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This guy's really awesome..... - 6/19/2009 6:45:26 PM

LookieNoNookie

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http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090619/ap_on_go_pr_wh/us_obama_fatherhood

"Growing up without a father left a hole in (his) heart", President Barack Obama told boys at the White House Friday in a remarkably personal Father's Day weekend message. He implored fathers everywhere — and the kids when they're older — to be involved in the lives of their own children. "This isn't an obligation," said the father of two in a message to millions of wayward dads. "This is a privilege to be a father."
(I say we turn this fucker into a Saint....he's pretty fucking awesome).

Post #: 1

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/19/2009 9:41:53 PM

kuriouswitch

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it kinda depends on teh type of man the father is. some are best left out of the picture. but the good ones are the ones who should most definately stay.

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 2

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 5:32:29 AM

CatdeMedici

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sperm uniting with an egg makes a father, it takes hard work to be a Dad and IMHO that is a smack in the face to his Mom who played both roles-

My 19 UM never had a Dad because I did the AI/donor pregnancy route--I am Mom and Dad, she never "had a hole in her heart" with no "dad", she had plenty of male role models, is quite nicely balanced and feels no compunction to mourn a missing body when I provided all the ying and yang of values.

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(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 3

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 6:20:35 AM

lazarus1983

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici

sperm uniting with an egg makes a father, it takes hard work to be a Dad and IMHO that is a smack in the face to his Mom who played both roles-

My 19 UM never had a Dad because I did the AI/donor pregnancy route--I am Mom and Dad, she never "had a hole in her heart" with no "dad", she had plenty of male role models, is quite nicely balanced and feels no compunction to mourn a missing body when I provided all the ying and yang of values.

I never had a father growing up either, just an incredibly worthless mother. But what I did have was a grandfather, who did his damndest to be that father for me. But I can easily relate to what Obama's talking about. There is a special connection, or at least should be, between a father and a son. I'll always remember as I grew up what a sense of loneliness I felt when I saw my friends go off with their dad to do something special. And now I still feel that twinge of sadness when my co-workers who are fathers talk about what they spent their weekend doing with their son.

Women may not like it, but there are things only a father can provide for his son. They'll argue up and down, but the problem is they just don't know. The same way that a man will never truly KNOW certain aspects of the female gender and the issues they face, certain aspects of men can only be understood by other men.

And considering this is in celebration of that thing called Father's Day, I don't think Barack Obama's mother is dumb enough to consider her son's comment a slap in her face.

_____________________________

The smallest minority on earth is the individual. Those who deny individual rights cannot claim to be defenders of minorities.

- Ayn Rand

(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 4

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 9:21:51 AM

DarkSteven

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I have a lot of respect for Obama as a man, and for how he and Michele are doing their damnedest to being up their daughters as best as possible.

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The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to lazarus1983)

Post #: 5

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 9:52:51 AM

slaveboyforyou

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From: Arkansas, U.S.A.
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quote:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090619/ap_on_go_pr_wh/us_obama_fatherhood

"Growing up without a father left a hole in (his) heart", President Barack Obama told boys at the White House Friday in a remarkably personal Father's Day weekend message. He implored fathers everywhere — and the kids when they're older — to be involved in the lives of their own children. "This isn't an obligation," said the father of two in a message to millions of wayward dads. "This is a privilege to be a father."
(I say we turn this fucker into a Saint....he's pretty fucking awesome).

Why is he a candidate for Sainthood for saying something that is completely obvious? "Hey dads, don't abandon your kids and don't ignore them!" Wow, that's fucking enlightening! I never thought that fathers should be involved in their kids' lives until I saw that Obama said it.

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 6

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 10:05:07 AM

cpK69

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~fr~

Did I miss something, where were the young females?

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Post #: 7

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 11:29:08 AM

Loki45

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici
sperm uniting with an egg makes a father, it takes hard work to be a Dad and IMHO that is a smack in the face to his Mom who played both roles-

Whether you have a mom who plays both roles or not, the absence of a father is still felt. Moms can do alot, but they make for some REALLY awkward talks for a young son. They can't show you how to shave your face, how to defend yourself from the bully, etc.

He's not slapping his mother in the face, especially since he was raised by his grandmother since age 10.

Just as a single dad would find it tough to raise a daughter on his own, a single mom can have difficulties occasionally that a mom-dad couple would not.

_____________________________

"'Till the roof comes off, 'till the lights go out
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(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 8

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 12:18:42 PM

subrob1967

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I guess Bill Cosby should have been Canonized years ago by your standards.

ObamababyDaddy seems to have done alright with his bank VP Grandparents, exclusive prep schools in paradise, and under the tutelage of guys like Ayers & Wright

(in reply to Loki45)

Post #: 9

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 12:18:45 PM

cpK69

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loki45
Just as a single dad would find it tough to raise a daughter on his own, a single mom can have difficulties occasionally that a mom-dad couple would not.

So very true. (Why do they want to beat the crap out of eachother all the time?)

Then again, sometimes being there isn't enough. My dad was 'there', but was no match for my mother; he spent a lot of time hiding.

Kim

_____________________________

Humility is where weakness and strength meet and humanity begins.

one voice

(in reply to Loki45)

Post #: 10

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 12:27:19 PM

lronitulstahp

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quote:

ORIGINAL: subrob1967

I guess Bill Cosby should have been Canonized years ago by your standards.

ObamababyDaddy seems to have done alright with his bank VP Grandparents, exclusive prep schools in paradise, and under the tutelage of guys like Ayers & Wright

... *yawn* Seriously is it still the "babydaddy" stuff? Nothing new? At least it it were something new, it might be just a tiny bit amusing....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suaveqvlWP8

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(in reply to subrob1967)

Post #: 11

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 3:32:51 PM

Loki45

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quote:

ORIGINAL: subrob1967
ObamababyDaddy seems to have done alright with his bank VP Grandparents, exclusive prep schools in paradise, and under the tutelage of guys like Ayers & Wright

Statements like this show you really have no idea what you're talking about and thus, are not worth the effort.

_____________________________

"'Till the roof comes off, 'till the lights go out
'Till my legs give out, can't shut my mouth."

(in reply to subrob1967)

Post #: 12

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 3:34:05 PM

Loki45

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Joined: 5/13/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cpK69
Then again, sometimes being there isn't enough. My dad was 'there', but was no match for my mother; he spent a lot of time hiding.

The only thing I was to my dad was a weekend visit and a $100 a month child support expense. The only times I heard from him *not* on a weekend was when my mom ratted me out to him about my grades.

And he can't understand why he barely hears from me now that I'm an adult....go figure.

_____________________________

"'Till the roof comes off, 'till the lights go out
'Till my legs give out, can't shut my mouth."

(in reply to cpK69)

Post #: 13

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/20/2009 5:04:37 PM

cpK69

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loki45

The only thing I was to my dad was a weekend visit and a $100 a month child support expense. The only times I heard from him *not* on a weekend was when my mom ratted me out to him about my grades.

And he can't understand why he barely hears from me now that I'm an adult....go figure.

It sounds like a bad situation from both ends; one I have seen a variation of, all too often.

My 19 year old son’s situation isn’t much different, where the actions of his father are concerned. Our son was a trophy for family gatherings, but no regular visits; unless his dad thought he could get a piece of me.

One difference, however, is that my son went to live with his father for five years. The state he came back in was not a good one. Definitely could have been worse, but for awhile it was up in the air. It has taken a lot of work, and patients, to undo what he went through under his father’s, and grandfather’s ‘supervision’.

Thankfully, my own experiences served well in helping him to overcome most of it, but he is still pretty angry at both of them, and also rarely visits his father.

Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t been perfect either, but somehow, being able to admit to them that I screw(ed) up, seems to have made a big difference.

Usually, there is at least one of the three, sitting not too far away from me, often less than two feet. Hopefuly, that's a good thing.

Kim

< Message edited by cpK69 -- 6/20/2009 5:06:32 PM >

_____________________________

Humility is where weakness and strength meet and humanity begins.

one voice

(in reply to Loki45)

Post #: 14

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/21/2009 5:59:32 AM

CatdeMedici

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loki45

quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici
sperm uniting with an egg makes a father, it takes hard work to be a Dad and IMHO that is a smack in the face to his Mom who played both roles-

Whether you have a mom who plays both roles or not, the absence of a father is still felt. Moms can do alot, but they make for some REALLY awkward talks for a young son. They can't show you how to shave your face, how to defend yourself from the bully, etc.

He's not slapping his mother in the face, especially since he was raised by his grandmother since age 10.

Just as a single dad would find it tough to raise a daughter on his own, a single mom can have difficulties occasionally that a mom-dad couple would not.

I completely and vehemently disagree--that is based on gender roles, NOT parental roles---I can absolutelyy teach him to shave, I absolutelyy can help him tie a tie, understand wet dreams, standing to pee, relations with women, and the male psyche--it's called investment--just because a parent is one gender or the other does not mean they are invested---there are as many dead beat Moms as there are dead beat Dads--its the time INVESTED that makes a parent a parent NOT whether they can teach them to stand or sit to pee, or tie a tie.

IMHO Obama's mother struggled, I guarantee she did all she could to get him the best, do the best and knew she had to play both roles--sure she won't complain about his statement---she's freakin dead---I find his comments shallow and callous. Having TWO people in one's life doea not guarantee one has PARENTS.

_____________________________

I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to Loki45)

Post #: 15

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/21/2009 6:37:01 AM

cpK69

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A couple of thoughts to add to the conversation:

As a mom, I have been ‘blessed’ with some very interesting facts pertaining to the development of my offspring. I had no idea kids told their parents that stuff.

Another thing I wanted to mention; I realized a long time ago there’s a reason it takes two to make them, because it takes both to raise them. I wouldn’t have dreamed of trying to keep the fathers from seeing them, just one chose not to.

And, being raised with one or more parent absent, can mess with a child no matter which parent is missing, and what sex the child is. However, I agree that doesn’t mean it can’t be done successfully, and sometimes even better, than some situations with both parents present.

Kim

_____________________________

Humility is where weakness and strength meet and humanity begins.

one voice

(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 16

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/21/2009 7:26:47 AM

lazarus1983

Posts: 828
Joined: 2/25/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici

quote:

ORIGINAL: Loki45

quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici
sperm uniting with an egg makes a father, it takes hard work to be a Dad and IMHO that is a smack in the face to his Mom who played both roles-

Whether you have a mom who plays both roles or not, the absence of a father is still felt. Moms can do alot, but they make for some REALLY awkward talks for a young son. They can't show you how to shave your face, how to defend yourself from the bully, etc.

He's not slapping his mother in the face, especially since he was raised by his grandmother since age 10.

Just as a single dad would find it tough to raise a daughter on his own, a single mom can have difficulties occasionally that a mom-dad couple would not.

I completely and vehemently disagree--that is based on gender roles, NOT parental roles---I can absolutelyy teach him to shave, I absolutelyy can help him tie a tie, understand wet dreams, standing to pee, relations with women, and the male psyche--it's called investment--just because a parent is one gender or the other does not mean they are invested---there are as many dead beat Moms as there are dead beat Dads--its the time INVESTED that makes a parent a parent NOT whether they can teach them to stand or sit to pee, or tie a tie.

IMHO Obama's mother struggled, I guarantee she did all she could to get him the best, do the best and knew she had to play both roles--sure she won't complain about his statement---she's freakin dead---I find his comments shallow and callous. Having TWO people in one's life doea not guarantee one has PARENTS.

You can teach him all that, but you'll never know what it's like to be a boy growing into a man in this world. You point out very superficial things, things that, yes, anybody can teach anybody. But whether or not you want to admit it, there are some things only a father can provide a son.

And once again, you complaining that Obama making remarks about the importance of a father figure on FATHER'S DAY is a slap in the face to his mother is retarded. Maybe on Mother's Day, if Obama just sat around and talked about nothing but the father he wished he had, and completely ignored what his mother did for him, then you might have a point.

_____________________________

The smallest minority on earth is the individual. Those who deny individual rights cannot claim to be defenders of minorities.

- Ayn Rand

(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 17

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/21/2009 8:13:23 AM

CatdeMedici

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Personally, I would have been more impressed if he would have said"

" as a Father, I see xxx.."

" we fathers of today need to band together to do xxx"

"Fathers today face xxx when raising their children"

In order to get people's attention, one must make the present at times more relevant than the past.

oh and the superficial things I mentioned were in response to a post that mentioned superficial things-and I guarantee you, with love, affection, investment and attention, I can overcome any perceived obstacle to raising an opposite gender child.

It doesnt matter if I get what its like to grow in to a man, if I have failed to help him grow into an intelligent, contributing human being comfortable in his skin, because after all, all men who start out that way, don't end up that way do they? If I have raised him to be comfortable in his skin, no matter what that skin is, then I have done a damn sight better job that "be a man son".

_____________________________

I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to lazarus1983)

Post #: 18

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/21/2009 8:28:11 AM

lazarus1983

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Joined: 2/25/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici

Personally, I would have been more impressed if he would have said"

" as a Father, I see xxx.."

" we fathers of today need to band together to do xxx"

"Fathers today face xxx when raising their children"

In order to get people's attention, one must make the present at times more relevant than the past.

oh and the superficial things I mentioned were in response to a post that mentioned superficial things-and I guarantee you, with love, affection, investment and attention, I can overcome any perceived obstacle to raising an opposite gender child.

It doesnt matter if I get what its like to grow in to a man, if I have failed to help him grow into an intelligent, contributing human being comfortable in his skin, because after all, all men who start out that way, don't end up that way do they? If I have raised him to be comfortable in his skin, no matter what that skin is, then I have done a damn sight better job that "be a man son".

Yes, yes it does matter that you get what it's like to be a man.

Let's reverse the roles. Say a man comes along raising a daughter by himself. And he fully and completely believes that he can relate to and completely understand his daughter and everything she will go through in life, and that a mother isn't necessary at all. Would anyone believe him? Anyone? Nope. That man would most likely get crucified by mothers everywhere.

You see, I grew up without a father, and try as she might, my mother could never replace a male father figure. She could spend the rest of her life with me, she could invest all the time in the world, and it wouldn't help. I think deep down she knew that, despite her protestations that fathers aren't necessary.

_____________________________

The smallest minority on earth is the individual. Those who deny individual rights cannot claim to be defenders of minorities.

- Ayn Rand

(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 19

RE: This guy's really awesome..... - 6/21/2009 8:42:05 AM

lusciouslips19

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I have seen behaviors from women who grew up without fathers to be different than those who do. A need to make things work no matter how bad the boyfriend is,an attraction to losers that they can fix. Of course this doesnt go for everyone and some have had great male role models and stepfathers.

For all my father did to screw me up, he was still a mostly loving father thats own abusive childhood made him lash out in unhealthy ways and not give him a healthy example, but his heart was in the right place. The fact that he has been with my mother for 49 years has given me a stability that I do have a family to lean on and a solid foundation.

Though you can be ok without it is a given but I am sure all would prefer to have that foundation if it was available to them.

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(in reply to lazarus1983)

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