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RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 2:16:06 AM   
HeavansKeeper


Posts: 1254
Joined: 5/14/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PyrotheClown

I irk my self when I read these threads.........



That's really quite inappropriate considering the mixed company, pervert.

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 5:23:50 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MidnightKat5000

What's with this "I am into forced ___."  If you're into it isn't really forced, now is it.  This is usually from guys in regards to forced "femme".  When you have self-taken photos of you dressed, how it the fuck is it forced?!  Ugh, morons.


I don't think you understand the concept of 'forced ____' and just because someone is into being 'forced' to do something doesn't automatically make them morons nor does it mean they secretly like it. Oh, some do, no doubt, but it's certainly not universally true. Yours is a gross generalization with little in the way of factual reality.

I am very much into force play. Some of it I enjoy a great deal, some not so much and some I absolutely despise, yet the force part is a huge turn-on even if the play part is not enjoyable to me. I hate fucking when I'm on my period. It's uncomfortable, often painful due to my endo and I would never choose to do it on my own. As Sirs slave, however, I am subject to that fucking at his whim and after he fucks me, then grabs me by the hair and 'forces' me to clean him with my mouth, it's humiliating, objectifying and pretty much all-around disgusting but the 'force' part is a huge turn on for me and I hate that I love it. I would rather 'not' get turned on but I can't help that I do. It's not the activity itself, it's the force; Sirs physical, viseral, animalistic nature coming out and taking what he wants, as he wants, that really does it for me.

Now, all that said, and given the number of journal entries you have written on the subject of cross-dressers, I'm thinking that when you wrote 'forced _____', you actually meant 'forced femme' which is rather disingenuous on your part to make it appear as though you meant any sort of force play. If you think everyone into any sort of 'force play' is a moron, well, that's just rather juvenile on your part but live on with your bad self. Each of us forms opinions on our own criteria and you may think me a moron for being into 'force play', but I have formed my own opinion of you for failing to see all the ramifications of your aversion to it.

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Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 6:23:35 AM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		After reading your profile and a selection of the OP's journal entries, it just seems that she is a very angry person all around.  People like that need to spew their venom everywhere and then always wonder why they aren't getting the responses to their profile that they feel they should.

To the OP, I don't know whether you feel that crossdressers have somehow affected you as a transsexual or what, but your unattractive attitude has shown through clearly on this post as well as in your profile (even before getting to your journal posts).  Whether you joined this site to meet someone or to just make friends and speak with like minded people, that kind of attitude simply alienates others.

As for the "forced" anything.  It is a TERM, just like rape play, kidnapping fantasies and the like.  If simple terms get you this riled up, I would suggest that you have much bigger issues than being annoyed or "irked" at what other people put in their profiles.

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 7:36:50 AM   
Apocalypso


Posts: 1104
Joined: 4/20/2009
Status: offline 		Yesterday I forced myself to spend a hundred pounds on Ebay.  I hated every moment of it.  

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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 8:00:01 AM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		Or, maybe, it's their fantasy. And does not mean they do not or do have guts.
quote:

ORIGINAL: beargonewild

I just see that as the person not having the guts/courage/maturity to take responsibility for their own actions. It's easier to place that onus onto another by saying, "I was forced to wear panties" or "She/He made me wear diapers" etc. Thus if any guilt is felt after the fact then they conveniently avoid the self abasement over their actions.

(in reply to beargonewild)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 8:30:51 AM   
MistressSunny


Posts: 29
Joined: 1/3/2009
Status: offline 		I myself had often wondered about the whole forced issue as well... I am alot clearer on my thinking after reading Bitatruble's response, i think mainly becasue of the physical aspect, but I am still not sure how you can force someone into things that are not physical...

I often read profiles of men who are into forces backmail or forced money transfers....they really have me perplexed....so if anyone can enlighten me on how that works.... and wants to transfer money into my account.. then who am i to say no..... GET TRANSFERING......hehehe

Sunny 

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 9:05:13 AM   
MidnightKat5000


Posts: 97
Joined: 1/10/2009
Status: offline 		After hearing peoples thoughts on the matter, the idea of "forced" makes more sense to me.  I am more open to the idea of what "forced" implies.  As for the CD issue, it's not for me and I have my reasons and justifications for the dislike.

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 9:07:16 AM   
MistressSunny


Posts: 29
Joined: 1/3/2009
Status: offline 		I just checked my account...... nothing.... damn....I better her Hubby up for work then

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 9:20:53 AM   
DomImus


Posts: 2004
Joined: 3/17/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MidnightKat5000
LOL, you're preaching to the choir!  I have learned this long ago.


Okay, so we see things the same way. Dominants crow about how dominant they are when they really aren't. The forced femme contingent goes on about their thing when it really isn't forced. Most submissives have a handful of limits that they alone dictate. It's all a game we do for fun. Why rant about it? Go have some fun.

(in reply to MidnightKat5000)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 9:28:24 AM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

Or, maybe, it's their fantasy. And does not mean they do not or do have guts.
quote:

ORIGINAL: beargonewild

I just see that as the person not having the guts/courage/maturity to take responsibility for their own actions. It's easier to place that onus onto another by saying, "I was forced to wear panties" or "She/He made me wear diapers" etc. Thus if any guilt is felt after the fact then they conveniently avoid the self abasement over their actions.



There is a huge difference between a fantasy and being forced to do something which the person would not do under everyday circumstances. It seems by general consensus that the term "force" strongly implies making another perform an action against their will, ie - forcing a person to wear articles of clothing usually worn by the opposite gender, or forcing a person to engage in an activity they wouldn't do. When I am talking forced, I am solely referring to a state where a person is made to do something which consciously they will not do unless they are egged into doing to please another, even though a small part of their subconscious has a a curiosity or desire to do so anyway.


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(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 10:09:05 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

i think mainly becasue of the physical aspect, but I am still not sure how you can force someone into things that are not physical...


Well, for example, take the Mistress who tells her sub that "You'd better do X (scrub my bathtub, rub my feet, give me your money, etc.) or I'll release you," and X is the lessor of those two evils, a lot of submissives will comply rather than get released even if it's not something that they, personally, want to do or get turned on by doing. Perhaps that's not 'force' per se, but in the end the threat of release maybe a consequence that is too high a price to a particular submissive to pay so they feel as if it is forced.

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to MistressSunny)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 12:25:55 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

 
Well, for example, take the Mistress who tells her sub that "You'd better do X (scrub my bathtub, rub my feet, give me your money, etc.) or I'll release you," and X is the lessor of those two evils, a lot of submissives will comply rather than get released even if it's not something that they, personally, want to do or get turned on by doing. Perhaps that's not 'force' per se, but in the end the threat of release maybe a consequence that is too high a price to a particular submissive to pay so they feel as if it is forced. 


As S. put it to me, “if you want to be in my life you will do X.”  I don’t want to do X, I would be a happy person if I never had to do X again.  But I do want to be in his life, I want to submit to him; I want him to dominate me. 
It pisses me off that I dread and crave it at the same time.  I am not just physically forced; there is an emotional component that creates a perpetual mind-fuck.  It is a delicious conundrum!


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(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 1:15:02 PM   
GYPZYQUEEN


Posts: 730
Joined: 4/14/2009
Status: offline 		ALL AND OP;;

The concept of forced  and forced in the BDSM world needs
needs clarification for

 each person and in EVERY situation
because each situation is different and each person!!!!!
 
therefore when
I am with someone and they say
"Are you into forced cock sucking by het males" or
"Do you do forced ass play?"

 I NEED TO REALLY CLARIFY..BIG TIME

I go in depth wheather this is a potential sub or possible PT play mate..
We have to be on the SAME PAGE and clear up dibilitating notions..
I Ask
what is force? to you?
DO YOU UNDERSTAND WE ARE PLAYING AT IT???PRETENDING..?
that it is symbolic..? that YOU are CONSENTING?
are you a slave?/ sub?? bottom? how do you know?

IF I get vague answers and I get MANY then I am not going there with them

If they do not know that forced in BDSM means "consent to force/"( my opinion)
then they are not sufficently emotionally intelligent for interaction with me.

The idea of force can be a HOT STRUCTURE for some around which they build
their erotic responses...
or a DYNAMIC needed to drive the submission and Domination for the couple.

I had a sub who loved the idea that I woudl "rape" his ass any time I wanted..he never knew when..we could be driving on a road and I'd say "stop" and "get out"
or while he did dishes etc..or was in the garden.
He felt he was being "raped" and used on a whim..and we wrestled as well during..it was something that WORKED for both
BUT WE BOTH KNEW it was consent

Structures are there to help the D get as big as she can the the s get as small as they can..in a erotic..expanded sensational way
with INTEGRITY TRUST AND ETHICS......

If the person I am with
 has no idea of the deep emotional safety..negotiations and trust required and just thinks "forced" is a hot thing to come on over and do up for a thrill they do not get near me..

I am shocked at the number of men who want to be ass raped and have no idea what a botched "job" could do( to mind and body)..no idea..

or as it has been said here already ..the amount of men who
want to have ME as a force( tool) in  their lives do do something they cannot come to terms with on their own.

I think we should not scoff ppl who cannot come to terms with it...belittle or assign a level of BDSM evolution...
We should not think one kink is ok and another is not

I THINK WE NEED MORE TOLERANCE and EDUCATION and to really
think about MINDS first a lot more..

I am often frighterned at what I have seen or the potential I see
around the whole "forced " concept by the ignorant and uninformed;
..... by this I mean not enough knowledge..or info or
insight into their OWN process"

WHen ppl such  as the OP post and inquire....
however angry or judging they may present 
 it gives an OPPORTUNITY for discourse and I thank her for that..
 
IT also gives an opportunity to perhaps save some from abusive situations..I recieved 3 messages in the last while  from "subs" who actually did not know that force..REAL FORCE without consent WAS WHAT WAS HAPPENING AND WERE IN horrible situations..HOW coudl they not know??
*No info...being conned...fragility and opportunity siezed by vile piranhas who await..


GQ




< Message edited by GYPZYQUEEN -- 6/13/2009 1:31:20 PM >

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 5:30:06 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GYPZYQUEEN

I NEED TO REALLY CLARIFY..BIG TIME

I go in depth wheather this is a potential sub or possible PT play mate..
We have to be on the SAME PAGE and clear up dibilitating notions..
I Ask
what is force? to you?
DO YOU UNDERSTAND WE ARE PLAYING AT IT???PRETENDING..?
that it is symbolic..? that YOU are CONSENTING?
are you a slave?/ sub?? bottom? how do you know?

IF I get vague answers and I get MANY then I am not going there with them

If they do not know that forced in BDSM means "consent to force/"( my opinion)
then they are not sufficiently emotionally intelligent for interaction with me.



Then maybe it would be a better idea and a way to avoid any misconception by explicitly stating that I (figuratively) am turned on by consensual force play in  A,B, C, X and Y? I know for myself and possibly for many others, we view forced as a negative action. And before anyone wrongly assumes I am advocating this way is the right way,; it's simply an option which can/may be taken into consideration.


_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to GYPZYQUEEN)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 5:45:39 PM   
GYPZYQUEEN


Posts: 730
Joined: 4/14/2009
Status: offline 		exactl
quote:

ORIGINAL: GYPZYQUEEN

therefore when
I am with someone and they say
"Are you into forced cock sucking by het males" or
"Do you do forced ass play?"

 I NEED TO REALLY CLARIFY..BIG TIME






..
I am not sure if the quote here changes what you wrote but
I meant I need to CLARIFY when I am approached with the above statements..
I need to ask what they THINK IT MEANS>.??
I understand what you mean by stating what I think..for sure..and it is a good point..

Can you tell me what you mean that you view forced as negative..
Do you mean as in not consenual??


GQ

< Message edited by GYPZYQUEEN -- 6/13/2009 5:51:44 PM >

(in reply to GYPZYQUEEN)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 6:03:04 PM   
LyraLaLaurie


Posts: 83
Joined: 4/14/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PyrotheClown

would you prefer the term "very strong encouragement" lol


looool.

they just say forced so they don't feel guilty afterwards...w/e.

(in reply to PyrotheClown)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 7:01:19 PM   
Ialdabaoth


Posts: 1073
Joined: 5/4/2008
From: Tempe, AZ
Status: offline 		A question: where does 'Forced ____' end and non-consentuality begin?

(in reply to LyraLaLaurie)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 7:35:26 PM   
KneelforAnne


Posts: 1011
Joined: 6/14/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Ialdabaoth

A question: where does 'Forced ____' end and non-consentuality begin?


Well, in a perfect world it doesn’t.

However, in reality…isn’t that what safe words are for?

I (personally) think it ends when that feeling of desire (to please, or even for the act itself) is overshadowed by that feeling of “absolutely not” or also known as “hell no”... and the top doesn't stop.

The not stopping is the beginning of non-consent, imho.



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(in reply to Ialdabaoth)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 7:48:11 PM   
NihilusZero


Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Ialdabaoth

A question: where does 'Forced ____' end and non-consentuality begin?

At the desire to receive it. From my earlier post, punishment is, I think, a good example of this. An act which the sub/slave may not like or want (want as in 'the pleasurable yearning for, for the sake of the act itself') but which is desired by the sub/slave because of (presumably) their understanding that it will satisfy/please/honor their D-type.

< Message edited by NihilusZero -- 6/13/2009 7:51:39 PM >

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I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
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(in reply to Ialdabaoth)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Just a rant. - 6/13/2009 7:50:25 PM   
Ialdabaoth


Posts: 1073
Joined: 5/4/2008
From: Tempe, AZ
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ialdabaoth

A question: where does 'Forced ____' end and non-consentuality begin?

At the desire to receive it. From my earlier post, punishment is, I think, a good example of this. An act which the sub/slave may not like or want (want as in 'the pleasurable yearning for, for the sake of the act itself')but which is desired by the sub/slave because of (presumably) their understanding that it will satisfy/please/honor their D-type.


Of course, that makes things really difficult, when people deliberately obfuscate their desires.

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 40
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