How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (Full Version)

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emy33 -> How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 12:21:15 AM)

Hello everyone,
I am new to the boards but not new to collarme though I havn't been back to this site for long. I was just wondering how many of you have let your intuition influence you when meeting someone from online and how much has it effected that same decision?

For myself I have noticed that depending on what the expectations are for that meeting, it makes a difference on my level of listening to my intuition.  What I mean is, if I know I am going to meet people to get to know them with no expectations other than friendship. I listen to my gut but at the same time I am more lax on some safety issue that I should in all reality be aware of all the time. Where as If I am going to meet a potiental partner or someone with the expectations of seeing how well we mesh together for a romantic relationship then I am much more cautious and rely more on my gut to tell me what to do. 
I am really curious how many of you find yourself doing the same type of thing and if you have ever found your intuition to be wrong?
Thanks for your time.
Emy



BitaTruble -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 12:25:08 AM)

My gut is first, my head second, my heart third. All three of those have to be talking the same language. They're not always right, but when the three are in sync, I have my best chance of a positive reaction.



DemonKia -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 12:49:51 AM)

FR

I've got some okay intuition going on, but it's my (un)common sense I rely on, too, especially for meeting up with barely known strangers & acquaintances . . .. . .

Regardless of what the 'goal' of the meeting is, I urge you to make use of 'safe calls / silent alarms' . .. . . I can be sloppy about all kinds of things, but this one I'm a bit of a stickler for . .. . .. In part because the very discussion of my use of a silent alarm has sent some would-be whatevers fleeing, turning that discussion into a litmus test all on its own . . .. .

Whereas 'quality' friend candidates & domly types should be supportive of you doing what you need to do to be safe . . . . .

I'm especially concerned about submissives exploring their world safely, so your post pushed that button for me . . .. . You deserve to treat yourself as the precious person you are . . ....



YoungBlondeSlave -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 12:52:49 AM)

i've been screwed over pretty bad more than a few times. All of my senses are on high-alert until i really get to know the person, meeting them multiple times and developing a realtionship...even then i'm still on my guard.



GreedyTop -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 12:58:01 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

My gut is first, my head second, my heart third. All three of those have to be talking the same language. They're not always right, but when the three are in sync, I have my best chance of a positive reaction.


likewise.



emy33 -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 1:03:38 AM)

Thanks for the reply.  I tend to do the same for the potential romantic partner but not so much for the friendship meetings.  It's just something I have clued into about myself. I do take some percautions but I go more with just my gut for a friendship meet and greet than the other.



EmelineRose -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 1:09:21 AM)

I almost never ignore my intuition.  The few times I forced myself to turned out very badly. I believe "the voice" is telling me something for a reason.



emy33 -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 1:15:12 AM)

Thank you for the concern and your reply. I guess I should have qualified a bit more on how I react to meeting a potential friend vs a potential romantic partner. For me with the friendship meet I will let people know where I am going, how long I should be there and I will call them when I am on my way home. However I dont always disclose who I am going to meet or why to the people I tell about the meeting.. Im more lax and it is something I just clued into about myself. I just go with my gut on it more than using every facility I have.  Which I freely admit is a bit on the stupid side and I am hardly stupid.  However when I go to meet a potential romantic partner I am so much more cautious it borders on paranoid.  Not only do I go with my gut on how I am feeling, I take every safety percaution I can think of during the meeting as well as before it happens. And Ive only met someone online for " romance" as it were once.  I just find it curious on how we( meaning people) can and do react and use are intuition plus are brains in these types of situations.  Thanks again.
Emy



masmiss -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 2:00:45 AM)

My intuition has been pretty reliable when meeting people online.  But, I also have over 50 years of life experience that has given me the skills to evaluate potential partners relatively safely.  I made some stupid mistakes in my younger years and those lessons stick with me.



DemonKia -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 2:13:35 AM)

Thank you for clarifying, it sounds like you're doing fine, then . . . . . .

I tend to overthink things a lot, but my gut is usually right about matters of emotion & social interaction, when I listen to it . . . . . For me gut & intuition are the same thing . . . . .



JonnieBoy -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 2:46:17 AM)

Greedy has guts and intuition,and a heart of gold.

Pirate



littlewonder -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 3:34:47 AM)

It's a balance of everything but then again I don't really think that much about meeting people. If I feel like meeting someone and I think we might hit it off then I just meet them.

It's never seemed that difficult a decision to me.



Rainfire -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 5:14:08 AM)

Like some have said, it's a combination of things. I've had contacts from people that my hair stands on end and the gut screams "NO WAY IN HELL!" and then I have others that I'm like "cool - they'd be fun to meet!" (Kia, you're in that group if I ever get back to NorCal!)

Sometimes, it's about listening, talking and deciding if you can trust the person. Something not commonly known, yet, is that Lumus and I never met face to face in person before I actually moved here a year ago. After talking with Him for long periods of time, opening ourselves to each other, knowing where we stood and how we felt, I moved up here and when we met that first time, I knocked on the door and said "Hi Honey! I'm home!!!"  Now this isn't something I recommend for just anyone and everything. I did have some safe calls in place and made them so people knew I got here and I was safe. I had never discussed safe calls with Lumus prior to coming here but when I made the calls, innocuous as they sounded, He laughed afterwards and said "safe call?"  Yep! [:)]

If I have to worry about my personal safety that much, I'd be questioning what was triggering that worry. Lack of respect? Something that was said? ("What do you mean when you say amputation is a major fetish for you?????") Something dodgy or fishy about the person? It's just a combo of mind, heart and guts.



Drakontos -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 5:31:55 AM)

zaphira met Master through an online site, much like CollarMe. Two days after contacting him on the site, she went to meet him for dinner. zaphira never had any fears or doubts about meeting Master, except for the fear that he may pass her by.

zaphira must say though that she and Master do not have a romantic relationship; Master cares for his property, but he does not love or feel any other emotional attatchment, other than that of possession.

In the three years that zaphira has worn his collar, she has never once regretted the decision of becomming his.



Padriag -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 5:37:32 AM)

These two quotes pretty much sum up my opinion on the matter.

quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

My gut is first, my head second, my heart third. All three of those have to be talking the same language. They're not always right, but when the three are in sync, I have my best chance of a positive reaction.


quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

It's a balance of everything but then again I don't really think that much about meeting people. If I feel like meeting someone and I think we might hit it off then I just meet them.

It's never seemed that difficult a decision to me.


That said, I've met some great people from online over the years, I've also met a few lunatics (one of whom is currently cyberstalking me, making a minor nuissance of herself).  There have been those who fooled me completely about who they were or what they wanted, I've been played a few times.  It happens, that's just life.  I don't view giving someone online my phone number or meeting them as being any different from someone I meet in a store or a bar or a concert, either way its someone you don't really know, it could go either way and you won't find out til you try.



oceanwinds -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 5:47:51 AM)

My intuition comes first 98% of the time, with the other 2% not listening to it. However, i never have used online to meet a person that might be of interest for a relationship. Sir i met in an on-line chatroom that was devoted mostly to astrology. i went to pick his brain occassionally for a year, and then we decided to meet. I had never heard of BDSM, and didnt really expect to see him again. Just was a coffee meet that worked out nicely.



JaDaMaGi -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 6:11:55 AM)

Its probably different for guys and girls.  I'll meet someone if I think there's a chance something interesting could come out of it.  ...even if I think there's a chance they could be up to no good.  I'm not concerned about being emotionally hurt, so I don't do anything to avoid that.  ....but there's always a chance, though pretty small, that they could be lying about who they are, and think it would be funny to lure a guy over to beat him up with their friends.  ....or some other sick joke.  I always go in combat ready.  ha ha.  This sounds so funny, but seriously... I wear loose clothing, shoes that are good to run in, and stay really alert.
It does seem sort of silly, but the internet is a perfect way to lure someone to a place and have them not tell anyone where they're going.  its not like I'm going to tell all my friend.  Oh... ya... "I'm going to meet this kinda girl from the internet.  Ya... she said she's into being gagged with big cock while being fisted in the ass, so I'm gonna go check it out."
On second though, maybe I should say that to them.  ha ha.  They'd have pretty hilarious looks on their faces.  ...especially because it would be believeable coming from me.  :-P

Anyway... ya.




emy33 -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 6:31:03 AM)

I find myself doing the same thing in regards to a meeting that I know is not going to amount to anything more than friendship. If I think we are going to hit it off I go and don't worry so much about it. But with a possible partner I am a lot more cautious.
Thanks for replying , it's interesting what others do.
Emy



DesFIP -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 6:34:09 AM)

Since I didn't agree to meet until we had developed a friendship, for me it's a moot point. But as in any case I don't meet except for coffee and lunch if it so develops, security wasn't an issue for me. I don't feel unsafe in a Starbucks inside a bookstore.



emy33 -> RE: How much does your intuition influence you on meeting someone from online? (5/22/2009 6:38:53 AM)

Thank you everyone for all the replies. I have come to realize that I listen to my Intuition for all online meetings but I also have recognized that when meeting a potential partner I use more than  just my intuition, a lot more than I would with meeting just a potential friend. I am not only talking about meetings from a social dating site such as this one. But from different online forums such as college or some classes for writing that I am taking.  It's interesting to me how when looking to meet a potential partner I listen to my intuition fitst and if getting the go ahead that way I then proceed with great caution. But if I'm going to meet a "friend" I am a lot less likely to be cautious and just use my intuition. I wonder if that has to do with the relationship and the online venue where I first came in contact with that specific person. It's given me some things to think about and I appreciate all the responces to my question.
Emy



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