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RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/22/2009 4:21:48 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		um thank you i think, RedMagic1. I am sure there are a variety of professional people on CM. I am not sure why you felt it was important to tell me that though. If a lawyer reads this and wants to post on the thread, well more power to them, and i hope they do. If they don't either because of not wanting to break some law or give it away for free or because they would want waay more facts before giving an opinon, well more power to them for that as well.



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RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/22/2009 6:09:45 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Have her see a lawyer. I think she could sue him for violating her privacy, attempting to have her be harmed/assaulted/raped. But this requires a lawyer to figure out exactly what he's doing wrong, and to bring it to the DA's attention if she wants it to go to court.

It seems as though the police could easily get him to say incriminating things. Offering to sell a human being for one.

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RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/22/2009 7:05:46 PM   
aravain


Posts: 1211
Joined: 8/26/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub
libel and slander is only when what people say about you that isn't true.


You also have to prove that they KNEW it was untrue when they said it. And that it greatly damaged your reputation or mental health or one of any number of other things, if I remember right.

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/22/2009 7:17:43 PM   
Owner59


Posts: 17033
Joined: 3/14/2006
From: Dirty Jersey
Status: offline 		What a low class loser.

My gut tells me fate will fuck this guy, the way it needs to be done.



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RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/22/2009 7:30:04 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
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Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: aravain

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub
libel and slander is only when what people say about you that isn't true.


You also have to prove that they KNEW it was untrue when they said it. And that it greatly damaged your reputation or mental health or one of any number of other things, if I remember right.



That sounds about right to me. Might be able to get him on other things but I don't think slander or libel applies here. Naturally if a lawyer says differently, listen to them!

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/22/2009 7:35:38 PM   
slaveboyforyou


Posts: 3607
Joined: 1/6/2005
From: Arkansas, U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

I wasnt talking about criminal law as such, but civil law where you can sue about almost anything and the burden of proof is often on the defendant. But a friend of mine had a (sort of) similar thing, where a man was running around showing a phone pix of her and telling people she was this and that. She got a lawyer to write a cease and desist letter with the threat of a civil case for defamation of character (in this case that person x would have anything to do with the dom) and slander and libel (because the defendant would have to prove that person x REALLY did things, like pictures and stuff).  In some states person x might be able to get the letter for free from a kink friendly lawyer or at a reduced rate.


I've sued someone before.  It costs you money to file it, and it costs you a great deal of your time to deal with it.  The burden of proof is never on the defendent.  The plaintiff has to prove everything they are accusing the defendent of.  From what I read in the OP's description, that would be rather impossible.  She'd have to prove that this person is the one doing this online.  Emails on collarme aren't proof of jackshit.  You're also forgetting that this might be a tad embarrassing in court for the woman in question.  I know I wouldn't want to explain my sexual fetishes in a public courtroom.  Hell, the local newspaper might even find it amusing enough to write a story about it. 

quote:

I am not even suggesting that it wouldnt get thrown right out of a court, but then the wanna dom would have had to spend alot of money for it to even get to court to try to defend himself and might think twice about continueing to be a jerk.


He won't have to spend one dime to defend himself.  He can even sue her for legal fees in the event she loses. 

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RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/22/2009 8:32:26 PM   
redwoodgirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SoulPiercer

Take him up on his offer. Once you have ownership transferred, command him to leave your friend alone.



Best answer Ive heard!

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RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 6:27:11 AM   
UncleNasty


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Joined: 3/20/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

Seriously.  Seriously?  You understand the whole "innocent until..." thing?

Cali



That is the impression most have of our judicial system. It is operative far less than most realize.

Uncle Nasty

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 6:50:31 AM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		I don't mean to down play the potential danger your friend is in with this post. I do understand that someone walking around saying that person x is a slave and up for sale is potentially very damaging for their mental health, physical health, privacy, and professional life, potentially to their romantic life as well. That said...

We got to joking about how hard it would be to get the fraud squad to pull a sting (gotta love the movie lingo) on the jerk for human trafficking and misrepresenting the product. We got the best laugh out of trying to think of how to get jerk to pretend to be person x in front of others in an attempt to "sell" the product. Imagine if you will jerk dropping to their knees in front of men in black (make 'em nice and cute) in a wine bar at happy hour. For pettiness' sake make person x the biggest jerk YOU know and put your favorite dommy characters in the black suits. Or the most icky people you know in the black suits if you want another layer of humiliation.

Again this is in no way to belittle the very upsetting and dangerous place your friend is in, but rather an escape of the mind from reality, making danger into farce.


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RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 6:56:22 AM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		I would just laugh at him and then put him on ignore. He's obviously just trying to get to you and your friend. He most likely knows you're her friend.


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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 7:13:02 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: aravain

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub
libel and slander is only when what people say about you that isn't true.


You also have to prove that they KNEW it was untrue when they said it. And that it greatly damaged your reputation or mental health or one of any number of other things, if I remember right.



There are three elements to slander.libel:

1. The statements must be untrue and known to be.
2. There must be harm done to the victim.
3. The lying must be done with malicious intent.

Proving #1 will be he said/she said and almost impossible.  Proving #2 will be impossible.  I'm not sure about #3.

In addition, even when all three are met, there is a very high bar to meet.

The best thing to do is out this idiot to the local community.


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RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 7:21:14 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: redwoodgirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: SoulPiercer

Take him up on his offer. Once you have ownership transferred, command him to leave your friend alone.



Best answer Ive heard!


Oui......however that would be too easy and low drama.

Obviously we have several drama addicts involved. One feeding another......and on and on it goes.


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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 6:42:49 PM   
GodlessJezebel


Posts: 5
Joined: 10/13/2008
Status: offline 		The sub in question used to correspond with the "Dom" a year ago and as my original post stated, she shot him down after a bit for her own reasons.  I also know the "Dom" is referring to my friend because of the details he presented as well as the pictures.  When I asked my friend about it, she confirmed to me what I've stated in my posts.

I initially played along without letting the "Dom" in on the fact that I knew her because I wanted to see how far he'd go.  He offered to give me her phone number & IM (both of which I already have, obviously) but I said I'd rather wait for her permission. (He DID give me her correct home address.)  He suggested a 3-way IM.  As you can probably guess, the minute I expressed interest in "owning" her, she was suddenly no longer available.  Forbidding him to contact her after ownership was transferred was exactly what I had in mind until he realized his bluff had been called.

I finally told the "Dom" that he needed to ensure the people he contacted didn't already know the subs he was allegedly presenting and that he needed to leave my friend alone.  I read him the riot act but now he's just being an asshole.  I don't see legal action being a realistic option.  I just want this guy to stop copying my friends pics & presenting her as "his."

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 6:46:27 PM   
GodlessJezebel


Posts: 5
Joined: 10/13/2008
Status: offline 		And to those who think I want any type of drama, you obviously have not read my posts in their entirety.  I loathe drama, but I'm protective of my friends, particularly the more naive ones.

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 6:56:32 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		The only thing you can do is report his actions and as cali suggested, get a restraining order.  If he is giving out her home address then he is placing her in significant 'danger' and if you have written proof, then you have no other choice really if you want to assist her - if that is what she wants you help that is.
 
the.dark.

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 7:01:56 PM   
marie2


Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/4/2008
From: Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GodlessJezebel

And to those who think I want any type of drama, you obviously have not read my posts in their entirety.  I loathe drama, but I'm protective of my friends, particularly the more naive ones.


Ok, but if you're that concerned about this, why not go get a consultation with an attorney, and see if there is anything you can do about this.  Or go to the police station, it's free.  And explain the situation in general terms ( a guy online who used to know a friend of mine, is now giving her pictures and address out to strangers on the internet)  and see if they can recommend that she file some type of charges.  That would seem the route to take if this has been going on for a year, and if you're genuinely so concerned about this.  But you're sitting on a message board with people who can't do anything other than suppose.   I'm not trying to flame you, but it seems like there are other details missing from the story.  Otherwise, what has kept you from going to your local police station with this?

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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 7:33:49 PM   
slaveboyforyou


Posts: 3607
Joined: 1/6/2005
From: Arkansas, U.S.A.
Status: offline 		Fast Reply:

She's an adult I assume, so it's really up to her to do something about it.  From the information you provided, I don't think she has any legal recourse.  It's not illegal to give out photos, phone numbers, or the address of another person.  If he was actually directly harassing her or making threats, than that's a different story.  But it doesn't sound like that to me.  Depending on the laws in your state, she can go the restraining order route.  But that only stops him from communicating or having contact with her.  He can talk about her with whomever he pleases. 

If I were her, I'd change my number and be more cautious in the future with her online correspondence. 

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 7:41:11 PM   
GodlessJezebel


Posts: 5
Joined: 10/13/2008
Status: offline 		As I said earlier, I came here to see if anyone had been through this before and if so, what was done about it.  My friend is considering legal action of some sort but has the obvious discretionary issues.  I wanted to try to help, plain & simple.

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 9:32:26 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveboyforyou

Depending on the laws in your state, she can go the restraining order route.  But that only stops him from communicating or having contact with her.  He can talk about her with whomever he pleases. 


Actually, the judge can tack other stipulations onto the restraining order.  Such as destroying any photos he has of her.  Such as forbidding his use of the internet for a certain amount of time.  Such as forbidding him from disseminating any personal information about her, including her address.

Cali


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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Is there any recourse? - 1/23/2009 10:10:01 PM   
slaveboyforyou


Posts: 3607
Joined: 1/6/2005
From: Arkansas, U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

Actually, the judge can tack other stipulations onto the restraining order.  Such as destroying any photos he has of her.  Such as forbidding his use of the internet for a certain amount of time.  Such as forbidding him from disseminating any personal information about her, including her address.

Cali


Maybe it's different in California.  I've never seen a judge tack on stipulations like that in a restraining order.  A restraining order is not a conviction of a criminal offense.  He could always deny doing any of this, and it's not on him to disprove an accusation. 

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Profile   Post #: 40
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