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Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 8:41:38 AM

lobodomslavery

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Have you ever felt sorry for the many servants and Mistresses who get no one, who end up lonely cut off and unfulfilled
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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 8:43:53 AM

sirsholly

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it depends on why they are lonely, cut off and unfulfilled.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 8:52:12 AM

OmegaG

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there are people who are alone for a period of time in their life because they have things to do or to learn before they are in a place to have a healthy relationship.

The ones I feel sorry for are those that identify themselves as half a person without another and can't grow as an individual and get to the place where a relationship would be viable.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 8:52:14 AM

IronBear

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Been there myself and I know the reasons. I knew the odds were against me from the beginning and I accepted that. Feel sorry for them? No I feel sadness for those who are hurting because of their situation, but I emphasize with those who are on their own. I've even written a couple of poems about it..

< Message edited by IronBear -- 1/13/2009 8:53:25 AM >

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 8:59:58 AM

GreedyTop

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I agree with Holly and Omega

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 9:03:03 AM

colouredin

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I dont universally feel sorry for single people I am afraid. There are people who I think deserve to be in a relationship that was fullfilling to them (Greedy in fact was one of those people and I am so happy that she is now with someone who makes her happy) but thats on an individual friend level. Im single most of the time anyways and I wouldnt want people 'feeling sorry' for me. Many people are alone out of choice, you dont have to be in a relationship to feel fullfilled.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 9:06:32 AM

GreedyTop

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*smoooches my colourful girl*

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 9:16:09 AM

Lynnxz

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Sometimes people wouldn't be so lonely, cutoff, and unfulfilled if they'd quit feeling sorry for themselves and deal with life.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 9:19:58 AM

VampiresLair

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I have never felt sorry for someone who could not find a partner. Most of the time the reason they could not was because of expectations or lack of initiative for them to put the work into finding someone. Granted some people are unlucky when it comes to those things, but to feel sorry for them it would have to be something that even though they have put every concievable effort into finding a match they have failed. I have met very few like that.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 9:21:59 AM

sirsholly

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

Sometimes people wouldn't be so lonely, cutoff, and unfulfilled if they'd quit feeling sorry for themselves and deal with life.

and adjust their expections

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 9:22:06 AM

CarrieO

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OmegaG

there are people who are alone for a period of time in their life because they have things to do or to learn before they are in a place to have a healthy relationship.

The ones I feel sorry for are those that identify themselves as half a person without another and can't grow as an individual and get to the place where a relationship would be viable.

What a perfect way to describe it. I've chosen to not pursue a relationship aggressively at this time because I'm working on the next phase of my life.

I understand this period of growth and learning is necessary in order to be in the right mindset to be fully open to the type of relationship I desire.

Being alone is very different than being lonely. I enjoy the freedom being single allows me, personally. Having someone feel sorry for me because I chose to be single is actually a bit offensive.

I know people who have chosen to remain single (and um-less) and are quite happy and very fullfilled. Equally so, I know some very depressed and sad people who feel life has no meaning without another person in their life. They're the ones who tend to settle for the first man/woman that shows them any attention. That, to me, is sad.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 10:29:09 AM

myotherself

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Pity achieves nothing. I'm single, and I would very much like to be in a loving relationship. But I'm not.

I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me - hell, I refuse to let ME feel sorry for myself!

I've met my share of assholes, users and wannadoms. I've met some wonderful guys who just weren't meant for me. I've learned a lot about myself in the process and I'm growing towards being the person I need to be to successfully have a relationship.

When love kicks you in the teeth you've just got to get up, dust yourself down, paste a grin on your face and move forwards.

Well, that's the way I work things, anyway.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 10:38:45 AM

IrishMist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Have you ever felt sorry for the many servants and Mistresses who get no one, who end up lonely cut off and unfulfilled
kevin

Umm

No

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 10:39:32 AM

BondageBarbieX

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No,not really.That may seem cold but I don't really care enough to feel sorry for people I don't know.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 10:39:55 AM

chamberqueen

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I feel more sorry for one who settles for the wrong partner. While it can be difficult doing without it can be much worse trying to do your best to please someone who really doesn't either care for you or understand you.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 10:46:27 AM

thetammyjo

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Have you ever felt sorry for the many servants and Mistresses who get no one, who end up lonely cut off and unfulfilled
kevin

No.

With all the information available today and all the resources we can access to learn how to approach people, to learn about yourselves, and to make contact with others, I have to say that if someone can't find someone they need to re-evaluate how they are going about things and honestly ask if they are doing all they can.

Take a serious look at your excuses. How many of them frankly can you address if you try. Doing the same thing over and over is not trying, you have to expand yourself if you want to expand your possibilities and increase your chances for success.

Take a mundane example.

A person could have a desire to hold a particular job and then just use one resource to try and find said job. Why don't they make sure their skills are constantly upgraded? Why don't they try other networking? Why aren't they willing to move to an area with more jobs in that field?

We would probably say that that person just wasn't willing to do what they needed to do to succeed in their field.

I say the same about folks who "can't find a relationship" -- you may need to do a lot of work, a lot of uncomfortable self-work but if you aren't willing to do all of that, you won't succeed.

Some of us have an easy time than others but I honestly believe there are multiple potential matches for every person on the planet.

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 10:50:08 AM

lobodomslavery

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i neither have a job nor friends and it has not been for the want of trying. i dont know maybe its because they hear i have depression and they run a mile. still for being honest, would they rather i sprung it on them instead, no im not like that, life can be very hard for people not just me, i know plenty of guys like me who feel rejected not just in love but in life
kevin

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 10:51:29 AM

Lynnxz

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

i neither have a job nor friends and it has not been for the want of trying. i dont know maybe its because they hear i have depression and they run a mile. still for being honest, would they rather i sprung it on them instead, no im not like that, life can be very hard for people not just me, i know plenty of guys like me who feel rejected not just in love but in life
kevin

Do they just 'hear' that you have depression, or do they run away pulling their hair out because you use it for a crutch?

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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 10:51:30 AM

lobodomslavery

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i do take your points on board and your right tammyjo , still as you say, some people have easier times than others
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RE: Have you ever felt sorry for a servant - 1/13/2009 10:51:52 AM

agirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Have you ever felt sorry for the many servants and Mistresses who get no one, who end up lonely cut off and unfulfilled
kevin

Nope..I feel sorry for orphans who can't find loving homes, though.

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