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interesting findings - 12/9/2008 2:55:21 PM

LittleMissModern

Posts: 72
Joined: 12/7/2008
Status: offline

So, I have one of those things at the bottom of my profile that says "if you've read the whole thing, type this word" or whatever...

NOTHING that routes to my bulk mail has had my code word in it... I think that's interesting. I think it's like routing spam, where it's probably a copy and paste message, or something... it's "bulk mail" of some kind, I'm sure.

The few messages I've received in my actual in box have all contained my code word. (most of what I receive routs to spam)

Now for the question portion of this post:

I don't understand why someone would send me a message if they don't at all fit my "requirements". I've been on the site for a few years, and I still can't grasp the concept of someone who's 18 messaging me when my profile says 21+, or why a poly couple would send me a message when I specifically say I'm not interested in that. I understand that maybe some people want to build friendships, but these messages aren't friendship related... they're D/s related.

It's easy enough to ignore, but I just wonder what the psychology behind that is... are they going to change my mind with a block of text? No... not very likely. So what's the appeal of writing someone who isn't interested in you?

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RE: interesting findings - 12/9/2008 4:02:56 PM

came4U

Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline

If you go to mail options in your mailbox....you can only re-route other mail according to age, location, sex, couples, or no profile. Mine is set for no one under 36, no couples, no other continents, etc. and it does just that. It shuffles it to bulk mail. If you have it set so that it does not set off the alert for regular mail, don't complain. If it bothers you that much, don't open your bulk mail folder at all. I actually merely forget the bulk folder is there 90% of the time, so why reply??? They have forgotten all about even writing to you by the time you even read it.

Some people write, they don't read. Ignore it and move on. Poly couples as separate profiles do not get blocked as above, so sometimes they will write you because they have fewer options than a single guy/single woman have, they are merely trying, so no reason to worry. Treat them as any other, reply or don't. To open any mail takes a mere 10 seconds to see it isn't to your liking or not...get over it.

< Message edited by came4U -- 12/9/2008 4:10:39 PM >

(in reply to LittleMissModern)

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RE: interesting findings - 12/9/2008 6:24:25 PM

windchymes

Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
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What I found out recently is that many people read what comes up on the home page, the first couple of sentences of your profile, a little bit of journaling if you've done some. Your pic. They don't read the ENTIRE profile. If that little bit on the home page appeals to them, they write. They focus on what they read in the first sentence or two and nothing else.

My profile begins something like "Recently relocated and would like to meet some new people...." and I went on to describe what I'm looking for in more detail, which was single and emotionally available men. Well, the male half of a poly couple emailed me and became indignent when I pointed out that I SAID I was looking for single men and he kept insisting I wrote "I want to meet PEOPLE" and that I didn't specify what kind of people. He finally left me alone when I said to read the entire profile, it's all written further on down...not to mention the journal rant about married men.

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RE: interesting findings - 12/10/2008 10:54:13 AM

LittleMissModern

Posts: 72
Joined: 12/7/2008
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I guess, just because I know my own behavior, I would think people would read a little further before they contact.

I always do.

I guess I believe that if I want someone to read my whole profile, I should read all of theirs too. Plus it gives me isight. I'm not going to contact someone who states that they're not interested in females, or something else that qualifies as part of who I am, and I'm not going to contact someone who has qualities that I'm not interested in.

It's an interesting psychological thing... here we're given a box to tell about ourselves, for the specific reason of letting others read it, and apparently they don't. They have a chance to select you, or not, based on the details you've given about yourself and they don't take advantage of it.

It doesn't bother me when people contact me... whether they've read the whole thing or not... it's just interesting and it says a lot about the person.

If someone is asking to submit to me, and they haven't read the whole profile, that's not a good sign for them, or for me.

The sad thing was when this seemingly really cool guy contacted me without reading my whole profile. I just feel like if you can't take 5 minutes, then you're not worth a response.

(in reply to windchymes)

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RE: interesting findings - 12/10/2008 12:10:13 PM

Raechard

Posts: 3513
Joined: 3/10/2007
From: S.E. London U.K.
Status: offline

I can speed read any profile in less duck than sixty seconds and scan for hidden code.

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(in reply to LittleMissModern)

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RE: interesting findings - 12/10/2008 2:29:47 PM

UncleNasty

Posts: 1108
Joined: 3/20/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

What I found out recently is that many people read what comes up on the home page, the first couple of sentences of your profile, a little bit of journaling if you've done some. Your pic. They don't read the ENTIRE profile. If that little bit on the home page appeals to them, they write. They focus on what they read in the first sentence or two and nothing else.

My profile begins something like "Recently relocated and would like to meet some new people...." and I went on to describe what I'm looking for in more detail, which was single and emotionally available men. Well, the male half of a poly couple emailed me and became indignent when I pointed out that I SAID I was looking for single men and he kept insisting I wrote "I want to meet PEOPLE" and that I didn't specify what kind of people. He finally left me alone when I said to read the entire profile, it's all written further on down...not to mention the journal rant about married men.

Isn't it funny that he tried to force you into a non-consentual conversation? Probably would be the first to say consent is important to him.

Uncle Nasty, happily back to 1 1/2 hands.

(in reply to windchymes)

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RE: interesting findings - 12/10/2008 7:00:59 PM

bluepanda

Posts: 328
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline

I'm frightened of turtles. I know goddamned well the beady-eyed little bastards are up to something no good in there.

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(in reply to UncleNasty)

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RE: interesting findings - 12/10/2008 7:31:13 PM

Aileen1968