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Toys - 12/7/2008 10:41:51 PM   
futuremilf23


Posts: 20
Joined: 12/3/2008
Status: offline 		Hey yall :-]
I'm new to the site..so please go easy :-]

I was just wondering tonight and wanted to get some opinions/comments/ramblings....

Obviously toys can be expensive. Especially the good ones ;-]...
Do you keep toys from partner to partner?
Of course there are ways to sanitize them, and I don't necessarily just mean toys used...internally...hehe
Even if properly sanitized, does it creep anyone else out the first time you see a giant toy box and wonder how well used those toys are?
Now I'm not the jealous type at all...and it's not about that.
It just gives me the heebee jeebees lol
Anyone else?
What do you do with your old toys when you get a new partner?
Who keeps the toys after a split? And for that matter...are kink toys often present in divorce settlement papers? haha
"Fine, you can have the dog, the car and the house, but I'm keeping the dungeon!" hehehe
Hope you're all having a great night :-]

Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Toys - 12/7/2008 10:46:03 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		~Fast Reply~

Depends on the toys and how they are used. Insertables that are used solely on me stay with me and I wouldn't be creeped out by using a girl's trusty vib on her and only her. A double-ended insertable would probably have to die with the relationship.

Floggers and crops can, in my opinion, be divided up. If Val and I were to somehow split they'd probably go with me since I amassed most of our collection when it was "my" toybox before it became our toybox.

Nothing we have is worth much more than a hundred bucks though. I have no idea how more expensive and sizeable equipment are handled. Perhaps they stay with the person who has the space for them?

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to futuremilf23)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Toys - 12/7/2008 11:16:21 PM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline 		Other peoples' toys, unless I know their history (Like, I was there when they were purchased), oog me out.  Mine don't.  Then again, I ammarkedly more paranoid than most about such things.  I can tell a potential partner what has been used on whom and if they wish it not used on them, that's cool.  Also, condoms can be used on some toys. 
  Davan

_____________________________

May you live as long as you wish & love as long as you live
-Robert A Heinlein

It's about the person & the bond,not the bondage
-Me

Waiting is

170NZ (Aka:Sex God Du Jour) pts

Jesus,I've ALWAYS been a deviant
-Leadership527,Jeff

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 12:07:37 AM   
DomDG


Posts: 63
Joined: 8/30/2007
Status: offline 		As the high and might Dom my vision may be altered by the higher altitude of my throne , but here's my view of it. (actually since the toys aren't used on me, I may very well have different feelings on it)

Insertables belong to the one in whom they were inserted.  They never go into my toy bag at all! nope never!  I don't need it there, I won't be using it on anyone else.

All other items like floggers, whips, etc are carefully cleaned with antimicrobials before being returned to the bag.  If the bottom has her toys they are laid on a different table (we use tv trays in our dungeon) than mine so as not to intermingle. 

So no, as a top I don't have a problem with other's toys.  And I have never really had anyone have a problem with mine either.  People in our group stress safer play, and to be honest I have seen members borrow or loan impact toys to so a Top could try a new one or because maybe they didn't think they were playing at the party and got 'lucky'.


_____________________________

D
A sub with too much time on her hands should spend more on their knees.

(in reply to DavanKael)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 12:16:09 AM   
futuremilf23


Posts: 20
Joined: 12/3/2008
Status: offline 		Those are all good points :)

I think I meant more of after a ltr or 24/7 type situation.
It would probably be rather unrealistic to expect to toss the bag out after each play party :)

Borrowing toys...now that's new. hehe. I'm sure it's a great way to test something out before you purchase.


(in reply to DomDG)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 12:37:11 AM   
DomDG


Posts: 63
Joined: 8/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: futuremilf23


I think I meant more of after a ltr or 24/7 type situation.



In a long term relationship, I think a toy that was associated with one person, one in which she may have a deep connection should go with her.  I encourage a sub to buy her own stuff when she can, and those while they may be mingled with mine over a course of time stay hers.  Once had a sub that spent a lot money on some great paddles.  When things didn't work out, she left them with me because she not looking to play with anyone at the time.  She has remained a good friend.  Recently she found a Mistress and she politely asked if she could get her paddles.  Of course I said yes. 

On the flip side, as a Dom I have no problem using a toy that another Dom has used on a sub, even one like I mentioned before might have personal connection for the sub.  For me it's a new toy!

quote:



Borrowing toys...now that's new. hehe. I'm sure it's a great way to test something out before you purchase.




One night a great and dear friend came to a play party from another 'vanilla' event.  She was not at all intending to play, she just wanted to socialize.  Well a sub begged her for a flogging.  (This woman is POWERFUL in her flogging).  I was already in the dungeon just finishing cleaning up from a scene.  She asked if I had any that were "clean" and for us that means not used that night.  I pulled out my deerskin and a heavy suede (made by the sub who was begging for the scene, ironically).  Another time I was interested in buying a violet wand.  One of the Doms there and I talked and he did a scene with his girl, then he set aside the probes he used on her and set me up with the body contact probe (I gotta have one of those).  I did a bondage and VW scene that was so wonderful I was flying!  His generosity went a long way that night.


_____________________________

D
A sub with too much time on her hands should spend more on their knees.

(in reply to futuremilf23)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 12:42:49 AM   
aravain


Posts: 1211
Joined: 8/26/2008
Status: offline 		May not be the healthiest approach...

but I try not to think about it.



It works every time

(plus I'd only be in a situation to use a 'used' toy after I know that it's been sanitized... that is, I've *seen* it, or *done* it myself)

(in reply to futuremilf23)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 12:47:39 AM   
futuremilf23


Posts: 20
Joined: 12/3/2008
Status: offline
quote:

that is, I've *seen* it, or *done* it myself)


Now that would be a good approach. haha
I would probably be much more comfortable cleaning things to my impeccable standards.
That could also probably be a pretty powerful and humbling task...to have to clean the toys of all their past....


(in reply to aravain)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 2:34:33 AM   
DelilahDeb


Posts: 429
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline 		Life isn't safe; if it was, it wouldn't come with accident, injury, illness, and death.

That said, insertables in general depend very much on the material they are made of…and whether they can be bleached, boiled, or baked.

  • Stainless steel and high-grade plastic insertables (butt plugs, anal probes, fucking rods)? No prob, as long as they are 1) washed with near-boiling water and liquid detergent; 2) "sanitized" with a fresh 10% chlorine bleach solution; and 3) routinely encased in condoms for use.
  • Art glass insertables…ditto. (caution: no sudden temperature changes when washing!)
  • Violet wand probes? no insertions, and wipe down with straight ammonia (or fresh 10% bleach solution in hot water).
  • Wooden spoons and paddles, rattan canes and the like? As long as no blood sports occur, my multi-part cleaning system is 1) and 2) above. If I feel the need, step 3) is a thorough coating of germicidal spray followed by air-drying for a few days. (Oxygen kills a lot of things!)
  • Leather crops, floggers, and such (including my hippo-hide sjambok) get 1) wiped down with a cloth dampened in the bleach solution if any contact with body fluids has occurred, 2) sprayed with the germicide, and 3) air-dried by fan. Periodically, the leather gets a good conditioning as I see the need.
  • Ropes go through the washer & dryer (I skein them first), with bleach or ammonia (which is generally color-safe) added in the wash.
  • My massage tables get fresh sheets with every player, and the bleach-wipe on the vinyl upholstery in between.
  • Leather cuffs and such don't generally get more than the simple air-cleaning and an occasional saddle-soap & conditioning, though summertime sweaty scenes increase the frequency of that latter.


Nothing is perfect. You want safety? You're on the wrong planet.

Lady Delilah Deb

_____________________________

"All acts of love & pleasure are My rituals."
--from the Charge of the Goddess, a Wiccan teaching

(in reply to futuremilf23)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 3:34:29 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Funny you should ask.  I was telling someone very recently that a lot of the things in My toy bag have a lot of sentimental value.  Even if I never used them to play again, I'd be rather sad if they were no longer in My possession.  Many of them are linked to fond memories of when they were purchased or were given as gifts.  That's why I have such difficulty 'thinning' the bag down.

So, yes, I'm one of those folks who has quite an extensive collection.   No, I don't think it's ever freaked anyone out.    More often than not, I get the opposite reaction.  There are some pretty cool pieces in there.   Everything from a simple wooden spoon up through the violet wand.  (I should kind of mention here that I have various 'bags' or kits for different types of play.)

There are certain toys that are used on clip and only used on clip.  Anything that can be inserted or come in contact with any bodily fluid (blood, saliva, etc.) are not only cleaned, but are kept separate from the rest.  Those are the kinds of things that I suggest any bottom have a toy bag of their own for.  Dildos, gags, sharps, and other things of this nature.  If you have your own, you don't have to worry about who else they have been used on.

As for the rest, Deb gave some pretty sound advice in the above.  Those things are just too expensive to replace after every partner.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to DelilahDeb)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 4:47:11 AM   
pompeii


Posts: 934
Joined: 1/4/2007
From: Silicon Valley, San Jose, California
Status: offline 		Condoms on the insertables ... The leather goes unwashed ... (which is most of the toys) ... Should I be dry cleaning them?

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 7:42:21 AM   
SteveAndJaz


Posts: 151
Joined: 11/22/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pompeii

Condoms on the insertables ... The leather goes unwashed ... (which is most of the toys) ... Should I be dry cleaning them?


Im a bit baffled as to what kind of insertables you use? Good insertables are silicone. Silicone is none porous and can be cleaned at high temperatures but even then I would use a durex on it if I intended to use it on more than one person.
I think the problem with leather is its porous and will hang on to nasty germs/viruses but then so will rubber and wood. That's fine for personal use but not something to be passed around.

I do a lot of medical play and always buy surgical steel which I can put in the autoclave but a pressure cooker will do exactly the same thing and costs a lot less.

I never lend my porous tools to anyone. Anything I can virtually sterilize I am happy to loan out.

(in reply to pompeii)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 8:26:25 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		It really depends on the relationships and the toys involved.

My girls and I are fluid bonded and any and all toys in my dungeon will be used on them.

However, that is not the case with many of the toys with others.  I don't use anything that I can't clean/santize.  So things like leather will not be used on person to person that I am not fluid bonded with.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to futuremilf23)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 8:35:14 AM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Yes, I use toys from partner to partner, obviously using common sense in the process though.

Nope. It doesn't. I am not so unrealistic as to expect experinced players ot run out and buy new toys everytime they play. Specially if they play with new people everyday or every week.


I keep my toys, they're quite expensive and I refuse to get rid of them just cause my x has become an x.

If he bought the toys for me then I keep them, since I do not believe that you take back gifts once given. If they were his when we we entered a relationship they're his. If we bought them together dureing out relationship, well then depending on what it is, and if I really want it, we'll decide from there what to do with it.



quote:

ORIGINAL: futuremilf23

Hey yall :-]
I'm new to the site..so please go easy :-]

I was just wondering tonight and wanted to get some opinions/comments/ramblings....

Obviously toys can be expensive. Especially the good ones ;-]...
Do you keep toys from partner to partner?
Of course there are ways to sanitize them, and I don't necessarily just mean toys used...internally...hehe
Even if properly sanitized, does it creep anyone else out the first time you see a giant toy box and wonder how well used those toys are?
Now I'm not the jealous type at all...and it's not about that.
It just gives me the heebee jeebees lol
Anyone else?
What do you do with your old toys when you get a new partner?
Who keeps the toys after a split? And for that matter...are kink toys often present in divorce settlement papers? haha
"Fine, you can have the dog, the car and the house, but I'm keeping the dungeon!" hehehe
Hope you're all having a great night :-]



(in reply to futuremilf23)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 9:26:41 AM   
FRSguy


Posts: 653
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline 		No, not even the same rope!

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 8:57:13 PM   
futuremilf23


Posts: 20
Joined: 12/3/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FRSguy

No, not even the same rope!



Really? Why is that? Just wondering your reasoning :-] :-]



(in reply to FRSguy)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Toys - 12/8/2008 9:07:26 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		My rope is machine washable, so it gets put into a lingere bag and washed weekly. (Crotch ties anyone? That rope is thrown away when done on anyone other than myself)

Floggers and leather stuffs are wiped down with hospital grade germicide, and then left to hang out to dry.

The wooden canes are wiped with bleach and/or germicide, and periodically restraightened in a tub of warm water.

My insertables are just that... 'mine'. Even still, I splurged for the silicone ones, and I clean them each time by boiling them. It took me a while to realize they weren't going to melt and make cream of kinky soup.

Steel medical tools get autoclaved, I don't have one of my own, but thankfully my friend lets be borrow hers




_____________________________

HBIC



(in reply to futuremilf23)
Profile   Post #: 17
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