RE: Question of etiquette

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/1/2006 4:20:59 PM

SirDarkside357

Posts: 138
Joined: 8/7/2005
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All Masters do not assume that.....period.....any that do make an ass out of themselves..in my opinion.....what may or may not happen in the future is a different story.

(in reply to bloodredrose)

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/1/2006 4:33:02 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 823
Joined: 7/29/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: bloodredrose
Do all Doms/Masters assume things like this,or have i just been unlucky?It just strikes me as both presumptuous and rude!

mmmmmmmmmm well I don't know all Doms/Masters... but since I wouldn't take this persumptuous and rude action... then I have make the conclusion not all Doms/Masters would take this type of actions. mmmmmmmm now since I don't take this type of action and I consider my self to be a person generally polite and well manner in the interactions of with someone that is new to me... well I come to the conclusion that a Dom/Master of quality would demonstrated polite and well mannered behaviors and not be persumptuous and rude..... So... I have to question then.... was the person you talking to actually a Dom/Master in the first place in your opinion? I this type of behavior that this person the type of behavior you think a Dom/Master should or could exhibit? What I am saying... no matter how another labels themself... you have a right to agree with their label or not... if the behaviours demonstrated do not fit with the label as you see it... then well you have to reconsider their self-proclaimed label and Identify them with your own label... Wanker seems to be a good term for this person! but I am sure you have a more refined label than mine.

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/1/2006 7:14:03 PM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1199
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

was the person you talking to actually a Dom/Master in the first place in your opinion? I this type of behavior that this person the type of behavior you think a Dom/Master should or could exhibit?

Maybe I am missing something, but what, exactly, is un-domly/wankerish about letting a perspective slave know that when she belongs to him, he expects her to be open to involving her friends in their sex life?

It seems like a pretty reasonable request of someone's property. I don't ask my cat if I can use it's toys...I certainly wouldn't expect my slave to tell me who and whom she will play with.

I don't get monogamous Master/slave relationships. That isn't ownership, it's marriage... That isn't slavery, its matrimony.

Taggard

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 5:12:27 AM

Slaveless1

Posts: 47
Joined: 11/22/2005
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[presumptuous yep and just maybe....he is looking for it and not saying anything. I would bet that most men (master) want a poly situation if given the opportunity

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 5:33:53 AM

HoosierScorpio

Posts: 118
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I never assume every subs play with each other if they are together. I would had said I would love to meet your friends. It is nice to get to know the one you are with friends. If he changes that quickly then what else is he hiding deep or will he goes from nice then abusive. You got to feel convert able and safe with the one who will be your owner or Master. How long has this guy been in the lifestyle for if he been in it for very long that should not had been brought up but if he is a player would just see what else he will do. I would not lie I would love to play with two girls but I also know that I never assume every sub or slave I meet must play with me.

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 6:12:07 AM

KnightofMists

Posts: 823
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you right you are missing something.

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 6:32:56 AM

wetrope

Posts: 97
Joined: 8/9/2004
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Methinks that majority of dom's would not expect or anticipate such an attractive package as 2 for price of 1. But then all dom's r not all the same. Some are learning the hard way that sub's/slaves r not just sand that we use to keep from slipping on the ice. Stand up girl and let him have it 'tween the eyes.

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 6:41:28 AM

Tristan

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Getting back to the original post, are you sure that dinner did not simply mean dinner? I don't think there is any way near enough information to know what was misinterpreted and by whom. Besides, very little real information is communicated in online chats. All either sees is a few words and sentences. None of the non verbal communication occurs that let's a person understand the intensions of the other person. Both put a lot of assumptions into their communication. If you are looking for r/l, I agree with some of the other recent posts on CM...get off the internet within a couple weeks.

Tristan

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 8:15:22 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1199
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From: Rochester, NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

you right you are missing something.

I bet I'm not the only one... *wink*

Taggard

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 12:38:11 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

you right you are missing something.

I bet I'm not the only one... *wink*

Taggard

yup the world if full of "ill-manner presumptuous people" that can't seem to understand that there is a distinct difference between informing their potential sub/slave that they they could/would be involved in a variety of possible scenes with others including possible friends as compared to making the assumption that a potential submissive's roommate(friend) is going to be a play partner and they they are interested in him. Such a person is a wanker... idiot and simple.... Not Dominant in my sense of the word.

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 12:42:40 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Tristan

Getting back to the original post, are you sure that dinner did not simply mean dinner? I don't think there is any way near enough information to know what was misinterpreted and by whom. Besides, very little real information is communicated in online chats. All either sees is a few words and sentences. None of the non verbal communication occurs that let's a person understand the intensions of the other person. Both put a lot of assumptions into their communication. If you are looking for r/l, I agree with some of the other recent posts on CM...get off the internet within a couple weeks.

Tristan

well... considering she was obviously offended... since she did pose the question here... It is obvious she gained that perception from the wanker.... now maybe he was joking... or maybe a hundred and one things could of been.... But anyway you cut it... she got this perception for a reason.... At best... he poorly expressed himself... at worse he meant exactly how she preceived it....

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 12:47:36 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: wetrope

Methinks that majority of dom's would not expect or anticipate such an attractive package as 2 for price of 1. But then all dom's r not all the same. Some are learning the hard way that sub's/slaves r not just sand that we use to keep from slipping on the ice. Stand up girl and let him have it 'tween the eyes.

aaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwww now wouldn't that be nice thou... 2 for the efforts of 1 .... wet dreams of many I bet *G* That is almost as good as having the HOT sisters like the dang Fonz always got... my Hero!

But, your right... I am thinking that the great Majority of Dominants can appreciate that effort is matched with what one recieves in return.

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 1:09:04 PM

nephandi

Posts: 872
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Pepole, dont the other lady get a word in this to, it is not that one have to agree to play whit a Dom even if you are submissive and your frind is his.

Also, the man asked a question, dont shoot the poor guy, talk whit him, find out how he feels, how is he not a gentlman for asking a question, you are not even in a relationship yet, and he can not ask a simple question.

KnightofMists has a point when he says that the man may have expertations that dont overlap whit those of bloodredrose, that do not mean he is a bad person, only that he wants somthing differant and be thankful you find ut before there is a relationship there.

Bottomline is, this man is getting yelled at alot, when he is not here to defend himself, he may not be a dishoset, lowlife, jerk, only one that asked the wrong question, and pepole, we all somtimes ask the wrong question.

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 1:16:34 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 371
Joined: 7/1/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty

Maybe I am missing something, but what, exactly, is un-domly/wankerish about letting a perspective slave know that when she belongs to him, he expects her to be open to involving her friends in their sex life?

Actually, he's assuming that he will have access to her friend, simply because she is her friend. Which is wanker-ish.

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RE: Question of etiquette - 1/2/2006 4:07:10 PM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1199
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From: Rochester, NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
Actually, he's assuming that he will have access to her friend, simply because she is her friend. Which is wanker-ish.

Nowhere does bloodredrose say her paramour assumed he would have access to her friend. He simply informed the girl that when she became 'his' they would be inviting her to "dinner". A perfectly reasonable, and quite dominant, expectation of one's property.

I can only assume, if the dom in question is a safe and sane person, that the choice to play would be entirely with the other girl...but he, quite reasonably and dominantly (is that even a word?), did not want a D/s relationship with a girl who was going to say "no" to such things.

It seems to me, that there is quite range of ideas of what makes a "wanker" and what makes someone dominant. It is my (never humble *wink*) opinion that the man who expects his property to be the willing and eager participant of whatever the owner wants is much less of a wanker then the man who would be willing to own a girl who got to say no to bringing friends over for some play.

YM, of course, MV.

Taggard

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