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Rover -> RE: Self Improvement for Dominants (12/1/2008 4:16:55 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
quote:
ORIGINAL: Rover
Any time I have given her instructions that she fails to fulfill, the responsibility (or irresponsibility) is hers... not mine. If I tell her to have dinner ready at six and it's not, that's on her. If I tell her to wear the red panties and she does not, that's on her. If she has been trained to make my coffee to my taste and she does not, that's on her. If I tell her to mail my nephew's birthday gift by Wednesday in order for him to receive it on time and she does not, that's on her. If I instruct her on what constitutes acceptable behavior and she misbehaves, that's on her.
Not to be picky.. but I am going to be.
I don't particularly agree with these examples.. maybe because they are more simplistic than situations usually are.
For example. You tell her to have dinner at six and she doesn't. Is it really her fault when you called her at 05:59pm to have it ready.
Things like this is why I presented the idea of DOMS (Direction, Opportunity, Motivation, Skill) It is just a process to help establishing responsibility of what went wrong when a failure has occurred. I believe to often those that are barking commands are too quick to shift the responsibily of failure to the obedient servant when the command is not obeyed. Poor Dirrection, Lack of Opportunity to succeed, No motivation for the task and Insufficient skills for the task are all reasons for failure.. sometimes that responsibility rests with the Dominants.. sometimes the submissive.
Ummm.... I called at 5:59 AM and instructed her to have dinner on the table at 6:00 PM. Sheesh, we could play "what if" all day long to no one's benefit.
John
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