RE: Knowing someone on here?

RE: Knowing someone on here? (Full Version)

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LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 8:45:04 AM)
I guess it depends on your line of work rofl like first thing you never do is come to this site when your working at a major companies second do not be working at anything to do with polictal circles or education third church organizations so it depends where you work how much you really are going to let people dictate to you cost is a terrible thing but thats our responsiblity

peppermint -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 8:53:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: panthersub If you knew that someone you work with is on here, how would you react to it? More so if it is inevitable that you can't not see them on a daily basis? Would it make you uncomfortable, nervous, excited? I have met people in vanilla settings that i've met previously at play parties or events. The diplomatic way to handle it is to ignore that we know each other. The other person might not be out to those who are with him/her. Why should i presume to mess up their life? No, having that knowledge does not make me feel uncomfortable, nervous, or excited. Even if i felt those things is no reason to out someone at their place of employment.

Soyokaze -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 9:04:06 AM)
I make it a point not to be recognizable in my profile. It'd be pretty bad for me if I was outed. Therefore, if I saw someone I worked with on here, I would just ignore them and treat them like I did before I noticed.

panthersub -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 9:04:23 AM)
It would depend on whether you think it's a hypothetical question. What i may deem as a hypothetical you may think it's not and vice versa. All depends on the person.

SirDominic -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 9:05:51 AM)
From the phrasing of your question, (hypothetical or not), my impression is that though you know they have a profile on this site, you don't know them personally. In such a case I would not say anything at work ever. But were I looking, and the other person was a woman who interested me, I would certainly contact her here! Or, if I just thought they seemed like an interesting person at work, of either sex - again, I would contact them here first. Really I consider this just basic manners. You can't know, without knowing the person, what issues affect their lifestyle choices. They may be completely open to discussing it, but it is just as possible they have a life situation where they have to stay in the closet. I would never presume.

panthersub -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 9:06:09 AM)
My workplace is quite small and there's not a lot of people who work there, so it's like everyone knows about everyone type environment. More like a rural town type like setting.

sublizzie -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 9:10:10 AM)
A few years ago someone c-mailed me here. As his picture loaded I went "Oh, Sh**! I work with him!" My response to his c-mail was that he knew me cuz we worked together. I didn't let on who I was until we met at a munch. It was quite fun then to recognize each other. At work we'd chat after that but only in the vaguest of terms about attending a munch, nothing more than that. Both of our jobs could have been on the line. Now we're working at different places so we only see each other at events of one sort or another.

alianora -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 9:15:26 AM)
There are several people who I work with who are also members of this and other fetish sites. While we acknowledge silently that we are aware of each other here, we do not bring it into the workplace.

Jeptha -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 10:57:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SirDominic From the phrasing of your question, (hypothetical or not), my impression is that though you know they have a profile on this site, you don't know them personally. In such a case I would not say anything at work ever. But were I looking, and the other person was a woman who interested me, I would certainly contact her here! Or, if I just thought they seemed like an interesting person at work, of either sex - again, I would contact them here first. Really I consider this just basic manners. You can't know, without knowing the person, what issues affect their lifestyle choices. They may be completely open to discussing it, but it is just as possible they have a life situation where they have to stay in the closet. I would never presume. That sounds good to me. I also wouldn't mention it outside of this site because if they are on here, that is part of their personal life and I want to respect their privacy.

candystripper -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 12:13:44 PM)
Well, I'm on here as well, and mean no one any harm. At a private moment I might* share that with them, provided they themselves seemed trustworthy and someone I'd want to know better.* Generally though, I think it's best if my private and professional lives do not overlap too much. I've met a few people at work I could not resist making good friends with, but on occassion things have later gone south and I've been given pause about anything personal I might have told them. After all, have to make a living. candystripper [sm=pole.gif]

monywildcat -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 12:35:21 PM)
This has happened to me in the past, meh no big deal since I don't shit where I eat. The work-me is pretty separate from the not-at-work me. If it happened again, I would take the same stance and keep my yap shut. I'm a lone-wolf and will bury my nose in a good book on my lunch and break times, so shutting my pie-hole is pretty easy. Mmmm, pie....

panthersub -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 12:43:05 PM)
SirDominic: i do work with them on a daily basis and know them, well now, quite well, which i didn't need to know about. Anyways, yes i do agree that just ignoring them at work is something that should be done.

LaTigresse -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 1:01:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: panthersub If you knew that someone you work with is on here, how would you react to it? More so if it is inevitable that you can't not see them on a daily basis? Would it make you uncomfortable, nervous, excited? I really have no feelings one way or another about it. It's their personal life. I already know stuff about them that others would think are "weird". No, it certainly would not make me uncomfortable, nervous and definately NOT excited.

pinkwind -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 1:34:32 PM)
Personally i wouldn't react at all, keep work and private life separated as much as possible. i would keep a healthy check on my emotions too. But then you have given little to go on. Do you mean that you might look on them as a potential partner? Or are you worried that they might recognise you and maybe out you?

windchymes -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 1:43:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Rover quote: ORIGINAL: leadership527 Yup John, I'm pretty intimately familiar with the relevant laws. I put in my time in the manager's desk too. It's just that I don't perceive WIITWD as a sexual act anymore than I think of my marriage as a sexual act. And as they say, therein lies the rub. It doesn't matter whether you view WIITWD as a sexual act, you are not the jury. I imagine you (or any of us) would have a difficult time satisfactorily explaining that to 12 of our peers. And even if not found liable, there is the time, expense and publicity associated with the case itself. It is a risk that I'm unwilling to take, though others will decide for themselves. John This is indeed the rub. It only takes one pain-in-the-ass loudmouth (and every company has one) to run to management about how she or he feels "uncomfortable" around you. Or, if you decide to wear black to work one day, she feels "uncomfortable". Or, if you make a double-entendre joke he is offended. It's not what you DO, it's how someone else FEELS that matters to lawsuit-phobic management. I'm fortunate in that I work for a company that is pretty "cool" about diversity of all kinds and my immediate manager would tell the loudmouth to shut up and get back to work, as would his manager, and the one above him. And I love them for that. But, I also keep that side of my life private and don't post a public pic. (Don't get me wrong, if there was true harrassment going on anywhere, they'd squash it in a heartbeat.)

panthersub -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 2:15:44 PM)
i would not consider this person as my partner, and the person as recognizing me, i have no clue. But at the same time also don't want to take that chance.

Misstoyou -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 2:20:08 PM)
It has happened. I ignored it, as it wasn't someone who interests me in on a personal level anyway.

WinsomeDefiance -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 2:30:56 PM)
I don't think I'd be moved much at all, either way, if I found out someone from wok was on CM - unless it was that sexy manager in the warehouse. I've yet to run across anyone in the alternative sites I'm on that I worked with, but there was that one time one of the salesmen I used to work with accidentally emailed his ALT profile using his professional and personal mailstring list (even his ex wife was on that list). That was pretty amusing... My boss and I had to make an account to log on and view his full profile - then giggled like school girls when all the sex ads popped up while we tried to keep them off the computer so the Democratic party renting our space downstairs didn't walk in on us and think (or in my case - know) we were sick puppies.

IvyMorgan -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 3:03:02 PM)
My first day at my current job, the first person I met was someone I already knew from a kink/swinger venue where I had previously "worked". I said nothing at all, and it was about 5 months before he said anything to me. Bless him, he was nervous.

Max1000 -> RE: Knowing someone on here? (10/31/2008 4:49:19 PM)
I bumped into a co-worker at TGs once which as marginally embarassing for him I think. He tried to hide behind a pillar but I just yelled his name till it got too obvious to ignore me. We had quite a strained conversation but it was cool. Best just to throw out there. Its like when my cousins came to dinner with my family and one of them had recently come out as gay. My mum, bless her, didn't know how to handle the situation so I just blurted out "O HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN SEEING YOUR BOYFRIEND?!" Potentially a risky maneouvre but once the proverbial white elephant had been pointed out things were fine Same principle here. Me and him don't mention it at work and I think we have an unwritten thieves code that makes it unspeakable by the photocopier. I think this reply makes some sort of sense.

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