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ORIGINAL: oceanwynds


The struggle, though lessening, of switching from a vanilla relationship mindset to a Ds relationship mindset still exists. The art of finding ways to present an idea, instead of coming from an equal mind set and just saying, "Do you want to go and do this?", to Sir has been a major mountain for me to overcome. Understanding that it is fine to please him in any way he seeks, and it is his choice to sexually satisfy me too is different then what I experienced in my marriage.  I have finally grasped the why's to these two examples and know in Sir's and my relationship it is how it works. I understand now that I am in a BDSM / Ds relationship. I have even had many long conversations with myself, about why i am staying in this relationship and is this lifestyle really for me? The answer to the later is yes. Sir i just adore and desire to submit to him.
My question  is have others had trouble with going from vanilla to D/s mindset? If so how did you mentally process through this is not vanilla world anymore? For those who haven't experience this, but might have suggestions, please feel free to offer them.