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RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/4/2008 9:00:29 AM   
daddysliloneds


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

What specifications do you personally expect an individual to possess before you'd consider them competent rather than 'disturbed' (or needing psychological help...or just needing to be 'saved from themselves')?


someone can be 'disturbed' in my minds eye, as well as society on a whole, and yet still be competent...

a classic example is a friend who is a single mother, fighting for her life and losing in the hepatitis department, suffers from severe depression and mood disorders, is classified by psychologists and doctors as bi-polar as well as a dellusional and paranoid skitsophrenic(spelling is wrong and my brain is too tired to care), yet, she works full time caring for an alzheimers patient(the state certified her to do such), puts food on the table, has raised two wonderful children, has never harmed herself or anyone around her, is buying a house that she managed to get even after having to claim bankruptcy after a nasty divorce, has managed to find scholarships for her oldest child who is college student, does her own research regarding new hepatitis treatments and gets herself enrolled in the programs, understands more about blood plasma levels, etc, than anyone i know who isn't a doctor, and puts herself out there to help anyone she can along the way with any knowledge that she has that she finds may be useful to someone else...

so, for me, i judge a person by the life they lead; plain and simple.

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/4/2008 9:45:09 AM   
KnightofMists


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

I've reached the point of letting go of the idealism that I may have had to presume that folks (by simple virtue of being in what would popularly be considered a minority and deviant 'lifestlye') will unilaterally be more prone to display an anthropological worldview that echoes the empathy of being on the outside of someone else's ethical bubble.


I find it interesting that people hold to this idealism at all.  I find it incredible that people shift to the edges of the social fabric of society and actually pride themselves on being distinct from the mainstream and then suddenly feel that everyone on the edge should have some sort of empathy for each because they are on the edge.  I just find it very ironic that this idealism occurs in the first place... something that has never been a concept that I had to let go because I never embraced in the first place.

quote:


"Where does the line of "sanity" and the intellectual competence that qualifies one to make their own decisions (without outside derision) lie? "


We each have our own line...  I don't not thing you are going to find a universal answer... but there will be many similiar answers at the core of it.

quote:


What specifications do you personally expect an individual to possess before you'd consider them competent rather than 'disturbed' (or needing psychological help...or just needing to be 'saved from themselves')?


simple... they are able to maintain and promote there own well-being... that there actions are not going to be harmful to themselves and others.  However,... this line if you will is more than just a reflection of sanity... it is also a moral measure.


quote:


Now, the easier question related to this example is whether we would permit the individual to do as they wished with their own body (I'd like to think we would nearly all agree that they may, but if you have a dissenting opinion and wish to explain why, please feel free).


I do have a dissenting opinion.... Just because we have the desire... doesn't equate to it being good for us or another to fulfil the desire.  Many individuals do indeed fulfill there desires... and we call them psychopaths because of the desires they go out and fulfill.  It is easy to measure such individuals because they do these things against other human beings that are harmful...  I find it disturbing that just because a person does harmful things to others we want to stop it... but doing it to ourselves is suppose to be Ok!  This for me is a moral line and not just a social one.  I wonder how many think suicide is ok?  After all ... it just the individual that is affected.  Are we to have different levels of harm to the individual that is acceptable in our society and others that are not.  We can allow someone to willingly limit their ability to walk because they don't want legs... but we can't allow them to kill themselves... I find this to be hypocrisy at it's best.

quote:


But the secondary layer is how you, in the privacy of your own mind, would look upon this person for having that desire...and upon what logic that mentality is based.


It's not the desire that trouble me the most... it's the executing the desire or allow the desire to affect in a negative way himself and/or those around them.   Men.. me including have had desires to rape a women.  Does this make me a undesirable person.  Well... maybe I am not as pure as those that say they have never had the desire.... or maybe I am just more honest!  The fact is... my desire has not and will not be causing a negative affect on myself or others.  That is what matters to me.  If a person is having trouble with the desire... then it is advisable to seek help to manage it.  But we have countless desires... some not so good... that doesn't make us a bad person.




_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/4/2008 10:19:01 AM   
Ialdabaoth


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From: Tempe, AZ
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ialdabaoth

How that relates to consent: If I see someone who is striving to make the world a more interesting place, or someone who by their base nature is making the world a better place, then I am content to interact within the pattern of their behavior.

Does this mean, by virtue of those actions, you would consider that person "competent"? Is there something about an inner sense of altruism that you feel is directly linked to that competence?


I never said altruism. :) I don't mean "better" in the sense of "petting kittens and feeding the poor". I mean "better" in the sense of "more varied and interesting".

quote:

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ialdabaoth

If I see someone who is adding nothing I find interesting to the universe, then I'm going to try to shake things up a little bit. I never use the word "sanity", because I believe the very concept of "sanity" reeks of hypocrisy and hidden agendas.

I think I agree with you and the pejorative nature of the term...so I'm trying to amend it to getting people to switch to "competence" and "incompetence".


Except that you're carrying along the concept. You feel that the term "sanity" contains the hypocrisy and hidden agendas. I assert that the concept, whether you call it "sanity", "competence", or "decency", is so full of hypocrisy and hidden agendas that I'm not sure if they're semantically salvageable.

quote:

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ialdabaoth

But consent is a pretty straightforward process: First I attempt to communicate. If I connect with something in a way that causes true, empathic communication, then I have found something that I choose to illicit consent from before acting. If not, then I've got an object to do with as I please, unless something else connects with me in a way that causes true, empathic communication and requests that I not use the object - in which case I illicit consent from whatever is communicating. Does this make sense?


I'm not sure if you're saying that you use the empathic connection to suggest the capacity for consent of that person or whether you're saying that's what will prompt you to want consent from them. If it's the latter, then I'm still curious how you gauge them to be competent or not.


It's both, because "competence" has nothing to do with it. "Consent" is just shorthand for "I don't feel icky about doing X to something that made me care about what I believe to be its feelings".

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/4/2008 6:23:28 PM   
catize


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Joined: 3/7/2006
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quote:

  Just because we have the desire... doesn't equate to it being good for us or another to fulfil the desire.  Many individuals do indeed fulfill there desires... and we call them psychopaths because of the desires they go out and fulfill.  It is easy to measure such individuals because they do these things against other human beings that are harmful...  I find it disturbing that just because a person does harmful things to others we want to stop it... but doing it to ourselves is suppose to be Ok!  This for me is a moral line and not just a social one. 


And here is my problem:  where do we draw the line?  Several years ago I endured a continuing education workshop where the presenter made the statement “S + M is wrong, consent doesn’t make it acceptable. To hit anybody is always wrong.”  There was applause and cheers.
That man and most of the audience believe that I have no right to enjoy what I do, they believe it is not “good for me’’ to live my life the way I want.
I understand your point about psychopaths, and yes I believe there are many wrongs in this world. 
But again, where do we draw the line?
(Sorry, I know we’ve had this conversation before but it continues to be a struggle for me.) 


_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/4/2008 6:33:04 PM   
KnightofMists


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quote:

ORIGINAL: catize

[But again, where do we draw the line?
(Sorry, I know we’ve had this conversation before but it continues to be a struggle for me.) 



I can't tell you where "We" draw the line.... I can only tell you where "I" draw the line... and I expect that you can only tell me where "you" draw the line.  We might have the line that is very close to each other... or  our line is going to be vastly different.   The reality is that where we draw the line will have an affect on how we judge others and how we are judged.  These judgements can be postive or negative.  However, I don't draw my line because I seek to have others judge me postively over the negative.  I draw my line the way I do so I can judge myself postively. 

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/4/2008 7:20:33 PM   
catize


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quote:

  However, I don't draw my line because I seek to have others judge me postively over the negative.  I draw my line the way I do so I can judge myself postively  


Thank-you, that makes perfect sense and helped me 'get' it!

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/4/2008 9:02:27 PM   
sravaka


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This is a fascinating and valuable thread. 

When I think about it, I keep coming back to the idea that (at risk of being lit-crit-y) giving consent is a speech act, a communication with both illocutionary and (potentionally) perlocutionary force. 

Definitions:  if person A says "He has a gun,"  the locutionary act is no more than describing the fact that someone has a gun.  The illocutionary act may, for example, be giving a warning.  It gets perlocutionary if uttering the statement causes another to act, as in making person B run away or duck.

In short...  consent is an interaction.  This in itself doesn't particularly need to be said; it's obvious from every single post so far.   But the sticky point isn't really the intentionality (including competency) behind the locution.  It's in whether or not the communication gives rise to action.  Following from that (sort of)...   well, a few things.

* Sanity or competency is of necessity in the eye of the beholder.  (others have said this with less need for gymnastics.)  So is perception that an illocutionary act of "consent" is present.  (a whole other can of worms.)  Both of these things have a great deal to do with the perceiver's motivations, desires, ethics, "competency" etc.  I wonder if this can safely be left out of the equation.

Person A may wish to have his/her leg lopped off.  Ultimately, whether or not that desire is sane or rooted in competency is entirely academic unless someone else decides to aid and abet the desire.  (Of course, its being academic is not a reason not to discuss it.  I just wonder whether that discussion can be completely productive without accounting for all the relevant variables.) 

*Why would one wish to aid and abet that desire?  Just to make the aspiring amputee happy?  Maybe, if one were merely giving a referral; doubtful if one were seeking to be actively involved, to do the amputation oneself.

If (case 1) person A is an apotemnophile and person B an acrotomophile (person who likes amputees), shall we be happy that they found each other and leave it there, whatever squicky feeling we might have at a gut level?  What if (case 2) they both perceive it as a profound symbol of self-sacrifice on the part of the amputee, something he/she was willing to do for both of them, with the assurance that the amputator would cherish and take care of him/her and that the act would cement their intimacy?  (might two be the minimum necessary for argumentum ad populum?)  3)  What if (case 3) person A wants to give a leg as a gesture of self-sacrifice and person B just wants to feel his/her own power to maim?  Does any of this matter?  If it doesn't, would it matter if you substitute "beating until bloody" for "lopping off a leg"?

Finally, by what authority does someone decide to amputate the leg of another, or beat another bloody, or accept another's service?  Is competent consent all that's needed?  (and if that's the case, must not competently given consent also involve full knowledge and understanding of the do-er's motivations, etc.?)  Or must it also include something more-- concern for mutual pleasure?  Willingness to take responsibility?  Aesthetic considerations?  Defensible arrogance?

Sorry.   I suspect this will not help at all, in the end, and that it will render even more intractably difficult and undefinable something that was already intractable and indefinable enough.  But...  I'm also curious whether a slight shift of the frame might not yield other thoughts that will reflect back profitably on the original question.

Regardless, it has been very interesting to read all this.  I hope there will be more.
--sravaka








_____________________________

Miseries hold me fixed, and I would gladly cut these roots to become a floating plant. I would yield myself up utterly, if the inviting stream could be relied upon. --Ono no Komachi

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/5/2008 10:28:23 PM   
marieToo


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GR:

If I desire whacked-out shit and I consent to it because it fulfills me, is my consent invalid because I'm insane for desiring sick shit in the first place?

My next thought would be, who says sanity is good, and INsanity is bad?

I guess I'm not talking about psychotics and sociopaths, or mentally handicapped people, and things of that nature.

In general, I think people can and should do whatever they desire no matter how shocking, unless and until it affects other people who didn't ask to be involved.   I don't think sanity can really be defined.  And I view consent as an absolute.  Someone might consent to something for reasons that I personally find sad or 'wrong' or whatever, but it's still consent, even if their reasons aren't commonly viewed as healthy ones.





_____________________________

marie.


I give good agita.









(in reply to sravaka)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/5/2008 10:35:48 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CallaFirestormBW

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee

Okay but we can all agree someone should have said "no" to MJ about 4 noses and 6 pigments ago, right?


I -still- say he's trying to find a shortcut to becoming a zombie vampire version of Liza Manelli crossed with Elizabeth Taylor -- and if that's true, he's not quite there yet (especially because he hasn't gotten the breast implants!). *grins* But what is important is what -he- thinks he is becoming... so as long as he's not trying to dry hump the bookshelves at my house... it's his money, right?

*winks*
Calla



And here I've always thought he was going for a milky-androgenous version of Diana Ross...


_____________________________

Tress


"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


(in reply to CallaFirestormBW)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Sanity & Consent and the Veils they wear. - 10/6/2008 8:08:56 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: catize

quote:

  However, I don't draw my line because I seek to have others judge me postively over the negative.  I draw my line the way I do so I can judge myself postively  


Thank-you, that makes perfect sense and helped me 'get' it!


Glad you got it.... cause I lost it... can I have it back?

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 50
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