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He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 3:23:10 AM   
FirmhandKY


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This article is funny in soooo many ways, I just wish I could quote it all. Alas, copyright prevents that, so you'll have to click on the link to get the full impact ...

He ventured forth to bring light to the world
From The Times
July 25, 2008

The anointed one's pilgrimage to the Holy Land is a miracle in action - and a blessing to all his faithful followers.

And it came to pass, in the eighth year of the reign of the evil Bush the Younger (The Ignorant), when the whole land from the Arabian desert to the shores of the Great Lakes had been laid barren, that a Child appeared in the wilderness.

The Child was blessed in looks and intellect. Scion of a simple family, offspring of a miraculous union, grandson of a typical white person and an African peasant. And yea, as he grew, the Child walked in the path of righteousness, with only the occasional detour into the odd weed and a little blow.

When he was twelve years old, they found him in the temple in the City of Chicago, arguing the finer points of community organisation with the Prophet Jeremiah and the Elders. And the Elders were astonished at what they heard and said among themselves: “Verily, who is this Child that he opens our hearts and minds to the audacity of hope?”

In the great Battles of Caucus and Primary he smote the conniving Hillary, wife of the deposed King Bill the Priapic and their barbarian hordes of Working Class Whites.

And so it was, in the fullness of time, before the harvest month of the appointed year, the Child ventured forth - for the first time - to bring the light unto all the world.

He travelled fleet of foot and light of camel, with a small retinue that consisted only of his loyal disciples from the tribe of the Media. He ventured first to the land of the Hindu Kush, where the Taleban had harboured the viper of al-Qaeda in their bosom, raining terror on all the world.

There is much, much more ...

Firm

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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 3:42:34 AM   
camille65


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It had some clever moments but what I really enjoyed were the comments following it.
Good satire is so rare.


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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 6:30:22 AM   
bipolarber


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Which reminds me, I really need to get cracking on that parody of Mel Brook's and Carl Reiners "2000 Year Old Man", only substituting John McCain as the main character...

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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 11:57:16 AM   
philosophy


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McCain leant back in the old office chair and listened to the leather creak. It had been weeks since his last case and he had a landlord and a bar bill to pay. Not in that order. He turned the paper over in his hands, the dame that had brought it to him had smiled as she pushed across the desk to him. The neon from the street outside had made her eyes glow eerily. At least he thought it was the sign. There was something very strange about Georgina Bush.
........

(feel free to continue.....the satirical piece that Firm has linked to is very good, but satire is always a two edged blade.........)

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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 1:54:42 PM   
Thadius


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He did a live reading of it... which is so much better than just the text... background music and video.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThFvlybQYso 



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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 2:28:41 PM   
Sanity


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Gaa!

You should have warned us that it was on Fox News!!!

My eyes! My eyes, they're burning...

Quick, gimme an acid wash!!!

My eyes!!!


quote:

ORIGINAL: Thadius

He did a live reading of it... which is so much better than just the text... background music and video.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThFvlybQYso 




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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 2:32:09 PM   
dcnovice


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A friend sent me the YouTube link earlier, and I'm still chuckling.

Baker has quite a gift for KJV diction.

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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 2:33:46 PM   
Thadius


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quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

A friend sent me the YouTube link earlier, and I'm still chuckling.

Baker has quite a gift for KJV diction.


Yes, his voice and tone give the perfect feeling for the satire he was presenting.  I will definitely be looking for other writing by the man.

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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 2:44:49 PM   
Aynne


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Just soak the NYT in some water and apply compresses from that,  it should ease the pain.  As  far as the mental damage, no one knows for certain...



quote:

ORIGINAL: Sanity

Gaa!

You should have warned us that it was on Fox News!!!

My eyes! My eyes, they're burning...

Quick, gimme an acid wash!!!

My eyes!!!


quote:

ORIGINAL: Thadius

He did a live reading of it... which is so much better than just the text... background music and video.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThFvlybQYso 





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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/27/2008 4:29:52 PM   
kittinSol


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aynne

Just soak the NYT in some water and apply compresses from that,  it should ease the pain.  As  far as the mental damage, no one knows for certain...

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sanity

You should have warned us that it was on Fox News!!!

My eyes! My eyes, they're burning...

Quick, gimme an acid wash!!!

My eyes!!!






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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/28/2008 11:44:30 AM   
Aynne


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aynne

Just soak the NYT in some water and apply compresses from that,  it should ease the pain.  As  far as the mental damage, no one knows for certain...

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sanity

You should have warned us that it was on Fox News!!!

My eyes! My eyes, they're burning...

Quick, gimme an acid wash!!!

My eyes!!!








I try precious.  

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*Yes I know I have no profile at this time...

I looked in your eyes
Without saying a word
I told you what I am
And I hoped that you heard

~Owned and Loved by Master Sifu~

*founder of I Love Lushy Inc.*

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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/28/2008 12:18:24 PM   
slvemike4u


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ROFLMAO......but what would HE be doing with the NYT

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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/28/2008 2:37:44 PM   
Thadius


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quote:

ORIGINAL: slvemike4u

ROFLMAO......but what would HE be doing with the NYT


Using it for kindling?

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RE: He ventured forth ... (politics/humor) - 7/28/2008 5:33:47 PM   
Aynne


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because all of the big scary ideas upset him?  Truth to power.

_____________________________

*Yes I know I have no profile at this time...

I looked in your eyes
Without saying a word
I told you what I am
And I hoped that you heard

~Owned and Loved by Master Sifu~

*founder of I Love Lushy Inc.*

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