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Hi I'm Kittenysoft :) - 7/21/2008 11:49:48 PM

Kittenysoft

Posts: 2
Joined: 7/19/2008
Status: offline

Hullo everyone,
I'm a sweet midwestern gal who has been very active in BDSM for many years...all in my mind.

I've always had relationships with normal "vanilla" guys, choosing them mostly for their looks, and got super excited whenever they did anything even slightly dommish. Even though my turnons are relatively mild, I've been told more than once I'm obsessed with sex. Well, who wouldn't be? If all the best sex is going on in your mind, why wouldn't you spend a great deal of time there? However, I'm ready for a new strategy. One where I'm the normal one. And where real life is better than imagination.

I'll try to respect protocol (capitalization etc) when communicating with serious BDSMers, but I hope no one will be offended if I sometimes mess up. I am not trained that way and it is just not my thing personally. I don't define myself as submissive, masochist, or slave. I also wouldn't say that I'd never switch. Every once in a while I like to feel tough and in control--it's just that I like to lose control much more often. Someone told me that the appropriate term might be "bottom." But doesn't that sound like a gay sex term? I'd think it would just confuse people even more. I have no idea.

Anyway, it has been great meeting all the people who have sent messages so far, and I look forward to getting to know even more people in this forum and via chat.

Best wishes,
Kittenysoft

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RE: Hi I'm Kittenysoft :) - 7/22/2008 2:29:30 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kittenysoft
I'll try to respect protocol (capitalization etc) when communicating with serious BDSMers, but I hope no one will be offended if I sometimes mess up.

I wouldn't worry about others online protocol. You do what is comfortable to you and anyo ne who respects you will accept that. Don't force, just do what comes naturally - that way you aren't placing up any false ideas about who you are and are being yourself from the start.

quote:

I am not trained that way and it is just not my thing personally. I don't define myself as submissive, masochist, or slave. I also wouldn't say that I'd never switch. Every once in a while I like to feel tough and in control--it's just that I like to lose control much more often. Someone told me that the appropriate term might be "bottom." But doesn't that sound like a gay sex term? I'd think it would just confuse people even more. I have no idea.

No, it abolutely is not sexual orientation related. Bottom refers simply to the person who is on the receiving end, nothing more. It will not confuse people because it is a well used term.

quote:

Anyway, it has been great meeting all the people who have sent messages so far, and I look forward to getting to know even more people in this forum and via chat.

I suggest you participate in the forums as long as you have a thickish skin! People are cool in general and for any questions - it is as good as place as any to ask them.

the.dark.

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RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: Hi I'm Kittenysoft :) - 7/22/2008 6:10:10 AM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

Welcome to the boards. Relax... enjoy... have fun.

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-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

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RE: Hi I'm Kittenysoft :) - 7/22/2008 6:40:03 AM

seababy

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Joined: 6/20/2008
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RE: Hi I'm Kittenysoft :) - 7/22/2008 7:47:34 AM

Kittenysoft

Posts: 2
Joined: 7/19/2008
Status: offline

Thank you for the warm welcome dark, ResidentSadist, and seababy.

I will seriously think about changing from sub to bottom, dark. Thanks for the info. Guess I have some researching to do!

All the best,
Kittenysoft

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RE: Hi I'm Kittenysoft :) - 7/22/2008 8:03:19 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

I have to identify as 'submissive' on the profile section of CM... but as a general rule, I just identify as 'his'.
I wish they did have another option... but on the whole most of the choices are pretty cool. Enjoy the forum!

the.dark.

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RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: Hi I'm Kittenysoft :) - 7/22/2008 4:51:59 PM

masterofdrkness2

Posts: 1697
Joined: 3/17/2008
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best wishes on finding what you seek.. enjoy your stay here at C.M.

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So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skys from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
(Pink Flyod)

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