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RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 11:07:12 AM

sweetwenchie

Posts: 1993
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Sacramento, California
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For me a great deal of my place in the pool depends on the situation. With the right people, i'm in the deep end, at play parties (for instance) i am most definitely in the light frivolous kiddie pool splashing around like the big overgrown kid i can be.

i do attribute a deep meaning to my kink and how i live it, but it is not the whole sum of my being, merely an intrinsic part of what makes me me.

Okay, i probably made no sense in my ramblings... i'm going to blame the smoke filled air and see if i can cannonball in a kiddie pool without serious injury

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Post #: 21

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 11:23:47 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
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I was wondering that myself.
I can't see being one of the flag wavers. But I have always done this. I have enjoyed bdsm since I was young. My sub side flips in when I am in a relationship. It is not live or die for me. It is more like it is just who I am, what I do, WHEN I do it. It isn't a role.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl

by "deep" do you mean devoting every waking moment living the ultimate submissive and/or Dominant BDSM experience in which some around flaunt like flags waving in the wind ...where they live 24/7 in this sans the vanilla part to themselves?

if that's what you mean, then you can say i don't. i'm submissive 24/7 for Daddy however i don't live it to the point that's all i am - there's a difference. being submissive and having a kink interests is only a tiny sliver of who i am.

in other words, you can say i'm only "deep" in the wading pool up to my knees.

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(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 22

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 11:30:59 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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It's everywhere. I haven't had as much time lately for the deep stuff that deserves real attention, but it's still there in the back of my head for when I can.

Why choose one depth?

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Post #: 23

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 12:58:25 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
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I tread water a lot, and the deeper the water, the easier it is to float, right?

Being kinky is just a part of myself that I don't think about, like having brown eyes.

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Post #: 24

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 2:06:21 PM

eyesopened

Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline

i'm not sure i fully understand the analogy. i have not spent much time in the "community" as i've never really felt like i fit in. However, who i am as a submissive touches every part of my life and is not something i reserve for certain occassions. It is deep enough to also be extremely spiritual, that my ability to surrender to my Master gives me the ability to surrender to my God. It reveals new things to me every day, it helps me to grow as a person, it gives me strength during the difficult parts of daily living.

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Post #: 25

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 2:47:41 PM

silkncarol

Posts: 318
Status: offline

Well said eyesopened.... it touches ever aspect of my life.

The kink now is a different story....lol.... sometimes i'm cutting cleanly across the pool doing the freestyle..other times i'm treading water.......BUT....i'll never be happy sitting on the steps watching!

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Post #: 26

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 4:24:50 PM

Prinsexx

Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I've been working and contributing to a lot of threads here, as well as real time situations. Some are easy and some take what I would consider, a serious time commitment. I'm not always the most articulate when it comes to what I have to say, and it takes a time investment to find the proper wording in a written medium.

I am well aware that it takes all kinds in this wonderful, mixed up world that is all of BDSM. I wanted to ask a general question to the CM populace. How deep is your kink pool? Where do you see yourself in it? Are you the light and frivolous type, or do you attribute a deeper meaning?

i attribute the very deepest meaning....for myself that is.
It does take a time commitment and that's just here on the forums.
but the pay-off is just so fantastic and well worth the effort.
I rarely feel 'stuck' about stuff because i know if an unanswered question pops into my head i can post it here.
(And if it's been dne before LA will alwyas set me straight). If it's a deeply dramatic rant there will be those who will just throw a bucket of cold water over me and there will be others who will not only respond thoughtfully but will also take the time to mail me on the other side and in many cases have mailed without judgemnet and in total support and depth and with a commitment to me wcich is breathtaking.
i have made the most valueable connections here.
Some days i feel quippy and chippy and frivolous and it raises my sense of humour here to snap back at others and get snapped back at.
i also am truly fascinated by the cultural differences between predominantly the UK and the US and indeed the differences of approach to bdsm across the differing states of the US as well. the micro inequities, the micro-advantages and micro observations of the use of language i also really treasue.
What more can i say?
My pool is infinitely deep and the ripples never cease. Often i drown and there have been those here who have truly saved me through heart break and burn out.
And i have my Master from collarme. And that's very very deep inded. Immersed and baptised.
Prin xx

< Message edited by Prinsexx -- 7/9/2008 4:26:36 PM >

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Post #: 27

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 4:34:22 PM

lusciouslips19

Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline

I think it is all things. Sometimes light and fun and sometimes deep and soulful with tons of meaning, enjoy it all The shallow end and the deepest depths of the ocean.

Just know how to tread the waters so ya dont drown!

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(in reply to Prinsexx)

Post #: 28

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 4:40:14 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

quote:

How deep is your kink pool? Where do you see yourself in it? Are you the light and frivolous type, or do you attribute a deeper meaning?

The kink part of our relationship is not very extreme but we continue to explore new experiences. However the feelings and dynamics of our relationship run deep.

MARCO!!!..........

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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

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Post #: 29

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 4:55:55 PM

WinsomeDefiance

Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline

Polo!

Right now, if BDSM were a pool I'd be sunbathing and getting wet from all the fun other peope are having! However, I am ever aware that the pool is there and soon (hopefully really soon) I'll be diving head first into the deep end. Or, more likely edging out onto the steps and working my way back in (Michigan waters are colder than I'm used to after all). S'all good.

< Message edited by WinsomeDefiance -- 7/9/2008 4:56:49 PM >

(in reply to proudsub)

Post #: 30

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 4:57:42 PM

SirDarien

Posts: 7
Joined: 6/17/2008
Status: offline

This discussion has been going on long before I got here and with a Vanilla rating, (how degrading) I may just be doing this for my own benifit.

I cant call what I do a lifeSTYLE for it is indeed a LIFE.
There is no onther way to be. How many have had their lives change for the better because of it? Of course there are some stories that are less than successful, but these are usually when one party is not what He or she says they are.

By-and-large in the communities in have been involved with and indeed the experiences that i have had, Done properly this life brings order to entire homes, saves lost lives, and fills otherwise empty hearts. Kink? I think not.

In Colour,
El Gayuo Negro

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 31

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 5:05:59 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Polo.

Thank you everyone for your input.

When I had the thought, it was more about how different people see things in different ways. To some, to use DominantJenny's phrase, it is "slap and tickle". For others, it's a part of life because it is who they are.

For Me, I can either be splashing about in the shallow end or I can be submerged because My feet don't touch the bottom. The thing about it is, I always see Myself as 'in the water'. I've gotten out of the pool before, but it's more refreshing to be in it.

I don't have a vanilla Me and a BDSM Me. I have the Me that I am all of the time.

Keep 'em coming, folks.

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Post #: 32

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 5:09:37 PM

Prinsexx

Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: housesub4you

I jumped into the pool before I learned how to swim.

Now with more experience I find myself hanging onto the rope that divides the deep end from the shallow end.

paddle harder......?

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Metawhore.... the sound of a metaphore when gagged
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Post #: 33

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 5:09:41 PM

ProtagonistLily

Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

I don't have a vanilla Me and a BDSM Me. I have the Me that I am all of the time.

Yeah I was sort of thinking the same thing. I'm like Popeye...I yam who I yam... However, I can pass pretty well in vanilla contexts, and I don't give myself or my proclivities away unless I aim to.

While we have a mostly regular suburban existance, our pool is fairly deep; though I'm not sure I'd recommend drinking the water ~grin~

PL

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Post #: 34

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 5:47:54 PM

KneelingSilently

Posts: 38
Joined: 4/15/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I've been working and contributing to a lot of threads here, as well as real time situations. Some are easy and some take what I would consider, a serious time commitment. I'm not always the most articulate when it comes to what I have to say, and it takes a time investment to find the proper wording in a written medium.

I am well aware that it takes all kinds in this wonderful, mixed up world that is all of BDSM. I wanted to ask a general question to the CM populace. How deep is your kink pool? Where do you see yourself in it? Are you the light and frivolous type, or do you attribute a deeper meaning?

Rarely shallow and at times so deep that I fear I may drown.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 35

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 6:15:01 PM

WinsomeDefiance

Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline

I've been affectionately referred to, by my Gorean friends, as their tainted vanilla friend. My thoughts on BDSM are never stagnant, and I find that at times I only have enough energy and time for splashing about in a sprinkler (thanks chia for that mental imagery!), even if I'm enviously eyeing those fearless surfers out there riding the big ones.

When I first became involved in BDSM - 10 years ago - I was enamoured with the concept. In my mind it was this wonderful community of like minded people who stood for a more honorable way of life. I loved the idea of it being bigger and better than the dreaded "vanilla". I believed that we were all misunderstood and all we needed to do was be better represented. That in our diligence, we could change the mindset of the misinformed and ignorant.

Now that I'm older, perhaps not wiser but definitely less energetic, I am still enamoured with the concept -HOWEVER - I do not necessarily delineate between Vanilla and Kink. My pool is as fathomless as my heart and mind and energy allow. And yet, I do not see slap-and-tickle as wading in the shallow end and full all-out Authority Exchange as emersing oneself in a fathomless depth, because I think sometimes that those in a full Authority Exchange have their feet firmly planted upon a solid substance and their heads held high (figuratively) even when they are bowed low in deference. The analogy is interesting, and appropriate and raises a great philosophical debate. But, as I have said. My thinking may tend to leave me viewed as more Vanilla than not, by many. Simply because I do not see it as any higher, or better or worse or debased than any other relationship dynamic.

I've seen what most would view as a Vanilla marriage, have a strong Authority Exchange dynamic - my parents and my marriage was like this. There were no BDM beatings, nor play nor swapping of partners. But, the man was the head of the household. The wife was submissive to the husband and the children knew who was going to be giving the discipline if they misbehaved. In my mind, this is really no different an Authority Exchange than what people seek to achieve in a D/s relationship. In my mind, D's isn't that big of a deal and hardly 'kinky' because it is performed all over the world. It is natural and right for those who embrace it, and for most of those who do - have no real notion of being kinky or vanilla.

I realize this is not a popular viewpoint on these boards. Many want to believe that WIITWD (did I spell that correctly?) is special. Many want to glorify it. To raise it above the standard. I think that, for those who are true to themselves, that what it is we ALL do is glorious - whether outlandishly kinky, or moderately tame. Again, I'm probably not as extreme minded as many. I can be as content, without kink in my life, as I can be with it in it. So, from the perception of some, my philosophy is more 'wading pool' than oceanic, and I'm ok with that.

Marco.....

< Message edited by WinsomeDefiance -- 7/9/2008 6:21:02 PM >

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

Post #: 36

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 6:18:43 PM

Danner

Posts: 16
Joined: 10/30/2007
Status: offline

I spend so many of my waking hours working and living in a vanilla world. yepper, that cone over there to the left is mine. But I couldnt last 5 minutes in the bedroom in vanilla mode...I hate balancing the two, but Wwe have been doing this for so long now, I probably would die of a stroke if I were to wear leather and carry a whip 24/7. I dunno...I probably need the balance of the two more than I admit to. All I know.is I get hard instantly when kyss[D] is laid out over My knee, creamy ass ready for a good spanking!

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 37

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 6:28:47 PM

kittinSol

Posts: 16926
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Quivver

I need to be light and frivolous in the deep end

Ditto.

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Post #: 38

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 6:35:05 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

OOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do I get to play with fun toys if I go deep?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TSQ1Q8YA6I&feature=related

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Post #: 39

RE: How deep is the pool - 7/9/2008 6:44:51 PM

petdave

Posts: 2479
Status: offline

My pool is far too deep to stand in, and the water is very cold. And me? i'm sitting quietly on the bottom, thinking i should probably go up for air eventually.... Just like in a regular pool, as soon as i relax and let out my breath, i sink like a rock
*bloop*

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 40

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