RE: Defending your property (Full Version)

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TheGaggingWh0re -> RE: Defending your property (6/29/2008 8:29:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

Its stuff like that that made Angel pull his profile. I can handle the rudeness, really. WhatI dont get is the ones who get insulted I email them about Fox. They tell me it isnt my place...
Just gripy tonight, it seems.




I can completely understand where you're coming from. After a while, you're just like "ARGH". I just gave up after a while and when people pulled that one me, I was like, "Eat camel cock, goatfucker." It helped me release my 'argh'ness as well as made me laugh because goatfucker is such a hilarious insult.




Leatherist -> RE: Defending your property (6/29/2008 8:35:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheGaggingWh0re

quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

Its stuff like that that made Angel pull his profile. I can handle the rudeness, really. WhatI dont get is the ones who get insulted I email them about Fox. They tell me it isnt my place...
Just gripy tonight, it seems.






I can completely understand where you're coming from. After a while, you're just like "ARGH". I just gave up after a while and when people pulled that one me, I was like, "Eat camel cock, goatfucker." It helped me release my 'argh'ness as well as made me laugh because goatfucker is such a hilarious insult.


I prefer "May the fleas of ten thousand camels infest your ass crack" myself.




Evility -> RE: Defending your property (6/29/2008 8:37:55 PM)

"God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference."


There is a certain "cost of doing business" that goes along with online sites such as this and it also extends to chat venues like IRC. Getting all hyped up about something you have essentially no control over is pointless. When these folks get to the point of being inappropriate that is Fox's cue to cease communication with them. In person it might have to be dealt with differently but why get your hair in a twist over online nonsense like this? And why do you even engage these people and give them an audience?






scarlettjinx -> RE: Defending your property (6/29/2008 9:06:29 PM)

Papa and I usually giggle about the people that send me the messages such as "your submissive? Well, I am dominate so on your knees Bitch!!!!" And that is that. If I get more than one from someone, they will get a polite message from him that basically says 'please refer to her profile.' He has only responded strongly to one person that was extremly rude to me. I have to admit, I prefer when he addresses them, because I don't want to encourage anyone, and unfortunatly for some even no response seems to mean 'please continue bugging me'




DiurnalVampire -> RE: Defending your property (6/29/2008 9:11:40 PM)

Thats my position, it seems if Fox responds, positive or negative, it is an open invitation to converse. When I do, they like to insult me, but they back off of him. I block them after a message or two. Some get the hint, others hve their heads so far up their asses they can see last nights dinner.  Kill them with kindness as my boss used to say. They cant actualy ruffle me, but it is occasionally amusing to see how flummoxed they get when I am nice and polite while telling them they are idiots.
Maybe I should just lower my expectation of respect from others. Fox likes seeing me tell someone off, Angel used to as well. They like the protective side, even if it is just online. Face to face, it might be a touch scary.

DV




scarlettjinx -> RE: Defending your property (6/29/2008 9:29:34 PM)

Papa is a big fan of the line "She is being punished for not making it more obvious that she is collared and has no desire to speak to other Doms. Shame on her and thank you for bringing it to my attention."  The joke being that my first line states I am collared, and very soon after it says I have no interest in speaking to male Doms.
You would be surprised how many replies we have gotten that say something along the lines of  "just looking out for you man. Glad to help."  Pathetic really.




spanklette -> RE: Defending your property (6/29/2008 10:10:53 PM)

The idea of being protected gives me the warm fuzzies. The reality is a different story. Sure, if some creepy crawly gets in the house Protect! Protect! Of course, after a long lecture about topping from the bottom, the creepy crawly will move on to more exciting ventures or die of boredom.[:D]
 
I like the thought that I can ask for help, but I surely don't need it in most instances. To take it a step further, in my situation, it would be an inconvience to him. I'm all about making life easier for him, so why make needless taxes on his time?




candystripper -> RE: Defending your property (6/29/2008 10:46:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

Why is it, exactly, that when someone sends Fox an innapropriate message, they are disturbed or insulted that I message them to tell them to leave him alone?  He is more than capable of teling them off himself, and he does. But, since he is my property, I do not see anything strange about wanting to make sure that the purveyor of a rude message or an innapropriate comment or advance knows that he is an owned boy.
Is it because I am the Female in the relationship, and he is the male? Does that have to do with why it is looked at strangely if I stand up for him, though if a male dom were in the same position it would almost be expected that he do something?
Maybe this is a minirant. I get it alot. People want to talk to him, but not to me. I dont mind that, but when he has rules, they dont want to bother with "someone elses rules" and want to get around them. Of course there is someone elses rules... he is someone elses slave!

DV


DV, IME, no submissive is more sought after by a certain type of undesirable than the collared submissive.  If they are newly collared, or young, or particularly attractive, the behavior seems to increase drastically.
 
Anyone who would contact a collared submissive without first asking permission from her Dom -- if that is the protocol stated in the submissive's profile -- should be viewed askance.
 
I am not surprised it happens to both male and female submissives. Yes, the undesirables may also be mysoginists, but who cares?   Just makes the even more undesirable. 
 
May I ask a dumb question?
 
Why don't collared submissives and their Dom/mes have couple profiles?  Is it just that they haven't gotten round to it?
 
Thank you for replying Ma'am, sorry about the agro you and your submissive have been getting.
 
candystripper 




RavenMuse -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 12:35:04 AM)

It isn't that You are female Sweetie, I get the same reaction from dims when they get a responce from Me after they act inappropriatly toward My property too.It is a lack of respect for anothers Dynamic, which rather indicates a lack of respect and lack of understanding of the Dynamic as a whole.

Assuming that an Owned girl (or boy) shouldn't adhere to their rules for them, just shows they don't have the first clue as to what Ownership means... neither in general nor to the 's' type.




RavenMuse -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 12:43:02 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

May I ask a dumb question?
 
Why don't collared submissives and their Dom/mes have couple profiles?  Is it just that they haven't gotten round to it?



I am not going to speak for everyone candy, but in My case, I have no wish to speak here 'as a couple'. I am clearly indicated at the top of her profile, the fact I Own her is displayed clearly on Mine... other than that we both speak here as individuals (an Owned one in her case) rather than a couple profile where it is unclear as to which is speaking.

People often approach Me for advice and a number are now starting to do the same with her... Many who approach Me would probably not approach her and visa-versa (Even though it clearly indicates I have full access, it is still her they are approaching for advice, not U/us), the individual profiles work for U/us whilst a couple one wouldn't, I won't 'get around to it' because it isn't something I intend doing, end of.




missturbation -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 4:54:46 AM)

quote:

it seems if Fox responds, positive or negative, it is an open invitation to converse. When I do, they like to insult me, but they back off of him.


Don't feed the trolls springs to mind. [:D]
If i get a nasty message etc i just don't bother replying anymore. I don't even mention them to Sir.
These people just aren't worth yours or fox's or angel's time hun.




Sabella -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 4:58:51 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhisperSupremacy

In some ways I do find it slightly understandable.  My ex seemed minorly interested in another guy she met on the internet (not on this site)....  Having friends online is perfectly fine, but when another persons intentions become clear to me, that's when I have to step in and say "back the fuck off!". 
So you're "guarding" your ex from finding someone else? :stars: just a strange statement!

Why don't collared submissives and their Dom/mes have couple profiles?  Is it just that they haven't gotten round to it? Because I'm an individual, not a couple. In the conversations I have on here I want to be related to as an individual, not a couple.

I don't require the protection online. The internet snuggle blanket, as it were - it keeps nothing warm except the interaction between the couple if that is one of their little kinks "protect me! OOHHH!" "Oh yes honey I'm protecting you *draws flaming internet sword*" And there is nothing at all wrong with that [;)] if it's happening frequently and it really DOES annoy you you may want to eye your sub, seeing you get riled up and all protective may be part of his/her kink so they get the gooey glowy love feeling kicking.




TysGalilah -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 5:16:12 AM)

{Why don't collared submissives and their Dom/mes have couple profiles?  Is it just that they haven't gotten round to it? }

Maybe he just doesn't like me all that much.  Doesn't want to make THAT much of a commitment, yanno?

[:D]
 
 

 




thetammyjo -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 5:24:13 AM)

I'm going to play devil's advocate for a moment.

If Fox is "He is more than capable of telling them off himself, and he does." then why do you send them a message at all?

If someone tells me "I"m not interested" or "I'm owned" I figure I'm mature enough to stop so that person's owner also emailing me seems like an insult, a suggestion that I'm not capable of taking "no" for an answer. Feeling insulted, I react.

Add into the still existing sexism that says "as a man he should be able to care for himself and not need a woman to protect him" and the emailer might feel even more challenged. When people's paradigms get challenged, it is common to react again often without thinking or counting to ten.

Now I'll stop being devil's advocate.

As another dominant I can say that I understand your drive to protect. I've had to train myself to control that drive so that my own Fox is forced to stand up for himself, stepping in only when it is necessary.




Aynne -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 5:25:48 AM)

Christine I knew that was why you did that. I do miss seeing those gorgeous blonde locks and killer smile but I dont blame you. I took my picture down as well for the same reasons. I actuallt got rid of my profile too, at least for the time being. It is just easier to post here and talk to friends than to be explaining all the time that owned and taken means well...owned and taken.  Especially since this was not a decision that I came to lightly and I don't want any outside interference and I don't want Sir to spend valuable time answering inappropropriate cmails from men. Not that he does not love to do that but I can think far better ways to spend time...sighsss[:)] 


quote:

ORIGINAL: christine1

when i had a picture up here i got tons of those kinds of messages and my Dom would simply block the people who wouldn't leave me alone after i said no thanks.  now that my pic is down i only get messages from my friends here on the boards so it's all good.




RedMagic1 -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 5:28:16 AM)

Sorry, DV, but I agree with tammyjo.




DiurnalVampire -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 5:33:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

Why don't collared submissives and their Dom/mes have couple profiles?  Is it just that they haven't gotten round to it?


For me right now its diplomacy and not playing favorites. Which boy do I chose for a couples profile? There isnt a choice for a poly one, and though Angel doesnt have an active profile he does ghost on and look around the site on occasion.  I am not simply part of a couple, and though Fox and I have tossed around the idea of maing one and putting in mentions of Angel, we havent gottenaround to working out the specifics. Besides, I dont really care to give up my individuality nor does he. Even with a couples profile, we'd have our private ones... so what would that help when it comes to a situation like these?

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo
As another dominant I can say that I understand your drive to protect. I've had to train myself to control that drive so that my own Fox is forced to stand up for himself, stepping in only when it is necessary.

I think thats exactly what it is. I am a Momma bear when it comes to my boys. In real life, its obvious enough that we have seldom had problems I couldnt handle. Online, it is harder to growl at someone and make them back off. It isnt that Fox NEEDS me to say something, I choose to. He doesnt even know I have done so, unless I tell him.

Maybe thats the problem? Fox doesnt ask to be defended. He doesnt need to be defended. I want to and need to say soething to these people becasue I find it damn insulting that they act this way. I am also the type that would make a comment to someone who was flirting with my boy in a bar setting, just to make sure that even after he turned her down she knew he meant it and wasnt playing hard to get.

My time here when Angel had a profile made me jaded. He left because this was ALL he got after a time, and he just gave up. He was blocking every message, pretty much and taking a risk to log on to do so. I started replying to his "suitors" in an attempt to make them back off and hoping he wouldnt be driven to the point he was and jump ship. Fox is active in the forums and so he gets a better mix of mail, but hen I start seeing the same nasty stupidity in his mailbox, I want to make sure it never gets to the point it did with Angel before I stepped in. I'd rather be overprotective this time than allow another one to jump ship to avoid the negativity.




LadyPact -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 5:41:59 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

May I ask a dumb question?
 
Why don't collared submissives and their Dom/mes have couple profiles?  Is it just that they haven't gotten round to it?
 

candystripper 

It isn't a dumb question at all.  Like someone else mentioned, there really isn't an option for those of us who are poly to have a group/family profile.  For a while, I had a couple profile, shared with My husband, but I was very unhappy with the type of things that showed up in My mailbox.  I think it lasted about two weeks before I went back to a single profile, though I'm very specific in it about both My husband and My sub.

Both of them have profiles here and My screen name and picture are used in each of them.  There's little mistaking their connection to Me.




LaTigresse -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 5:42:43 AM)

If my girl/s were to be incapable of dealing with trivial internet bullshit, they would no longer be allowed access to the internet.

Problem solved.




mistoferin -> RE: Defending your property (6/30/2008 5:50:50 AM)

I agree with you there. I don't see ANY reason or circumstance where anyone should ever need protecting or defending on the internet. It's a medium that requires TWO way communication for a problem to be ongoing. If ONE of those involved stops communicating....problem is solved.




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