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RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:11:40 PM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline 		It's so easy to use this kind of question to chest-pound about uber Dom- subliness...lovely for you. You "can't take a break from who you are." Okay.

What defines "the lifestyle" from which the question references regarding taking a break? I don't want to start another semantical, drawn out, agonizing definition thread, but if you're not actually, actively participating, then might you not be "in" the lifestyle? And if you weren't actively participating, might it be possible that you may, on occassion, feel like not pursuing that participation?

Or is it like saying "I am a Taurus, I can't take a break from being a Taurus?" A Taurus is not a lifestyle...

[Edited to change a word I didn't like.]


< Message edited by subtee -- 6/17/2008 6:12:33 PM >

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RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:17:32 PM   
Skully7000


Posts: 377
Joined: 7/22/2007
Status: offline 		I don't take a break from the Goth Scene...I'm only focusing more on Fetish events... I don't take a break from Concerts I just prefer Clubs more...
I'm sure eventually I will attend less fetish events and more of other stuff...am I taking a break...hell no...just redirecting my energies to my current interest... doesn't mean I can't do whatever I feel like whenver I feel like... I still go to plenty of Goth events... just on nights when there isn't a fetish event. etc etc.

as for play...dynamics...the move and change organically...While I will always put the effort into them to make them thrive I will also be realistic in doing what is right for me and my partners etc.

(in reply to subtee)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:20:19 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline 		I sit on the fringes anyway so I come in, go out, and somehow meander through.. Sometimes I disappear, and sometimes I come back.. I'm probably one of the few who are stable in their instability.

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:27:35 PM   
trappedinamuseum


Posts: 5066
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		When I get extremely frustrated with how things are going, or a lack of, or when I need time to re-evaluate exactly what I am searching for, or need to back away from an unhealthy situation, then I take a break.

But, I always come back.  I can't escape, or hide what I am.


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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:29:31 PM   
mztresn0w


Posts: 174
Joined: 1/12/2008
Status: offline 		I took a 3 1/2 year break from the lifestyle. My submissive and I parted ways and I was just not happy with my life in general. So I started to date vanilla and became involved with a vanilla man. He had no interest in the lifestyle so I spent those years in a wonderful relationship. It was part of my journey and I don't regret one thing that I did or did not do. We all have our journey in life and nothing is set in stone. I came back to the lifestyle and now really don't see me putting it aside. The people in my life at are inportant to me know who I am and accept that it.

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:29:42 PM   
chiaThePet


Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline 		Sorry, I was in the bathroom.

Did I miss anything?

chia* (the pet)

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You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:30:31 PM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline 		Those are activities. Is that what constitutes "the lifestyle?"

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:32:08 PM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b

I sit on the fringes anyway so I come in, go out, and somehow meander through.. Sometimes I disappear, and sometimes I come back.. I'm probably one of the few who are stable in their instability.


Very cool statements.


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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:37:05 PM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

Sorry, I was in the bathroom.

Did I miss anything?

chia* (the pet)


Hahahaha good grief I love the Pet, Chia.


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Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:43:31 PM   
angelwithhonor


Posts: 193
Joined: 5/16/2007
Status: offline 		...chia i just love those eyeeeeeeeeessssss..*winks*

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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:45:14 PM   
angelwithhonor


Posts: 193
Joined: 5/16/2007
Status: offline 		...off the subject but why does it take so long on new pics all i did was take one down and passed it around.lol.....damnnnnnnn them..

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:50:50 PM   
chiaThePet


Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: angelwithhonor

...chia i just love those eyeeeeeeeeessssss..*winks*


"They're breasts Momma, and every woman has them."

     (Sissy Spacek in the much beloved "Carrie")

chia* (the pet)

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Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Taking a break - 6/17/2008 6:59:11 PM   
angelwithhonor


Posts: 193
Joined: 5/16/2007
Status: offline 		but mine only has one stray hair that wont go away chia..why do you get all the hair and breast ...geeeeeeeeeeshhhhhhhhh

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Taking a break - 6/18/2008 12:29:37 AM   
SireKane


Posts: 105
Joined: 1/22/2004
Status: offline 		If being dominant or submissive is part of your core personality. I don't understand how you can take a break from being who you are.  Does taking a break mean for that period you are not dominant or submissive?  Does it mean that you temporarily have gone vanilla? Please enlighten me.

(in reply to angelwithhonor)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Taking a break - 6/18/2008 1:22:46 AM   
Strongmindbody


Posts: 264
Joined: 5/15/2008
Status: offline 		I see "taking a break" as a time to scale back on active participation in BDSM, but not necessarily as an attempt to become someone else.

I love to swim in the ocean. But when the water gets too damn cold, I take a break. Doesn't mean I no longer consider myself a swimmer. Maybe just a bit wimpier than I would like to admit...

So yeah, I took a break. After a very long term Ds marriage disintegrated, I simply needed time to get my head together. Seemed like the obvious thing to do.

Active participation in BDSM can be pretty intense, consuming a lot of time, energy, focus, what have you. At times, that might not be the best way to spend our lives. I can see any number of reasons to distance ourselves from the lifestyle for a while; even this water can turn cold.

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Taking a break - 6/18/2008 3:09:13 AM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline 		How can someone "take a break" from who they are?

BadOne

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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Taking a break - 6/18/2008 5:24:12 AM   
TNstepsout


Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
Status: offline 		I think I've taken more breaks than not. The whole concept was so new and foreign to me, that although exciting and fascinating, it required me to reexamine my persective and attitude about a lot of things, including myself. (mostly myself) So at times I just needed to sit back and let it all soak in. It's also taken me a long time to figure out what I really want out of it, and while I was "figuring" it didn't seem right to mislead other people. 

(in reply to kallisto)
Profile   Post #: 37
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