RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (Full Version)

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cjan -> RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (6/7/2008 8:45:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Evility

It reminds me of Gordon Liddy holding his hand over a candle to prove that he could do it. I've always seen Buddhism as a somewhat strange religious practice. I have to confess that this article didn't alter that perception in any measurable fashion.


Evility, Buddhists tend not to judge other reiligious practices as "strange" or to  label them. Perhaps, you could take a spiritual lesson from their point of view.

Btw, the "practice " that they refer to in the article and label as "Buddist", is not the circumstance of living in such close proximity. The practice is to watch the mind and it's reactions to "unpleasant" phenomena. Just as watching the mind and it's reactions to "pleasant" phenomena can be a spiritual practice. It's not easy, but can take one a long way in becoming less reactive and, therefore, less likely to be swept away by circumstances.



NumberSix -> RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (6/7/2008 8:54:34 AM)

One would hope that the spiritual was set aside long enough to realize that the pickled eggs probably wouldn't be a good regimen prior to the 24/15

6



happypervert -> RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (6/7/2008 9:36:53 AM)

So if I send her to the kitchen to fetch me a beer I'd have to go too? No thanks!



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (6/7/2008 9:54:11 AM)

Nice reactions all!  At first my reactions was ugh- mostly because it wouldn't be a CHOICE then, it would be something I HAD to do and that tends to go against my nature of moving with the flow of what comes.

But I realized that my partner and I DO practice this regularly, so it obviously isn't that bad for us.  I noticed that the article and lots of comments made an issue about the bathroom deal.  I'm not really sure why that squicks people so much but my partner and I are often in the bathroom at the same time when one of us is using the toilet.  Don't see any reason why that should be off limits for us.

I also really enjoy the idea of being there in the moment and reall focusing on moving in tandem WITH your partner.  You're not allowed to see yourself as just an individual- you grow your life as a unit.  Focusing on breathing together, eating together, you can't really escape into the "I don't want" at that point.

And I can see why so many Westerners would reject that out of hand :)



YourhandMyAss -> RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (6/7/2008 3:54:24 PM)

I think it's cause most of us were raised that bathroom business was private and to be done in privacy. and the tabooness of following someone into the bathroom.

Plus there's the stink/embarrasment associated with being in the bathroom with someone, and yes, sometimes the smell of someones pee stinks and when james poops he stinks up the bathroom like a buncha dead rotten things sitting bloated in the sun, so for that part I have no desire to be in the bathroom or around it when he poops.

Me personally I am not shy at all about being in the bathroom together nor grossed out about it, my x and I used to make up little games to play when he followed me into the bathroom.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I noticed that the article and lots of comments made an issue about the bathroom deal.  I'm not really sure why that squicks people so much but my partner and I are often in the bathroom at the same time when one of us is using the toilet.  Don't see any reason why that should be off limits for us.




PanthersMom -> RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (6/7/2008 6:47:28 PM)

lol, tmi YHMA!   we've done the bathroom sharing thing too, hard to avoid it when there's only one in the house.  as we're both disabled, we spend alot of time together because there's really noplace to go.  i can't drive anymore so he takes me where i need to go.  we like being together alot.  we do need some space now and then, that's only healthy.  but for the most part, where there's one you can usually find the other close by.
PM



Emperor1956 -> RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (6/7/2008 10:17:39 PM)

quote:

cjan:  Evility, Buddhists tend not to judge other reiligious practices as "strange" or to  label them. Perhaps, you could take a spiritual lesson from their point of view.

Btw, the "practice " that they refer to in the article and label as "Buddist", is not the circumstance of living in such close proximity. The practice is to watch the mind and it's reactions to "unpleasant" phenomena. Just as watching the mind and it's reactions to "pleasant" phenomena can be a spiritual practice. It's not easy, but can take one a long way in becoming less reactive and, therefore, less likely to be swept away by circumstances.


Thank you.  both for attempting to educate one and many.  There is nothing at all "Buddist" about the actions the original couple take, it is the conciousness and sharing of the partner's concious that is the Buddist part. 

But, cjan (and anyone else who wants to chime in) did you find a dichotomy in what these Buddist teachers are doing?  In Buddism, one of the understandings needed to attain nirvana and a key philosophical concept is anatta, the concept of "non-self" or the rejection of a separate self.  I would think that the constant attention of another person, even the constant presence of another person, would make anatta very difficult as you would be constantly reminded of two selves...your self and the other person.  It would make rejection of the limiting self -- already a very difficult task for those of us who are no where near enlightenment -- that much harder, I'd think.

E.



popeye1250 -> RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (6/8/2008 12:42:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PanthersMom

lol, tmi YHMA!   we've done the bathroom sharing thing too, hard to avoid it when there's only one in the house.  as we're both disabled, we spend alot of time together because there's really noplace to go.  i can't drive anymore so he takes me where i need to go.  we like being together alot.  we do need some space now and then, that's only healthy.  but for the most part, where there's one you can usually find the other close by.
PM


I don't think anyone would want to share a bathroom with me.



YourhandMyAss -> RE: Intimacy- No less than 15 feet apart for 24 hours (6/8/2008 9:53:01 AM)

Sorry PM hehehe[:D] On his days off and even when he gets home from work early I want to spend every minute next to him, with him, doing something with him or with him in easy reach. The generally 8 hours he spends away at work everyday is my away time:)
quote:

ORIGINAL: PanthersMom

lol, tmi YHMA!   we've done the bathroom sharing thing too, hard to avoid it when there's only one in the house.  as we're both disabled, we spend alot of time together because there's really noplace to go.  i can't drive anymore so he takes me where i need to go.  we like being together alot.  we do need some space now and then, that's only healthy.  but for the most part, where there's one you can usually find the other close by.
PM



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