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softness -> RE: Does long disance really work between a Master and a slave (6/6/2008 11:33:18 AM)
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It can and it does ... and we are doing it now .. but there are several important factors that make it work for us
1) Timeframe- that has always been the understanding between us - that I would move to Him, with an emphasis on sooner rather than later. If that focus was lost, so would our relationship. We are both heavily real time people - this is a life we want to live, not a role to play at the weekend or a couple of nights a month in a hotel. We both want a no shit, real life, 24/7, TPE Master slave relationship. That just simply can't happen 10,000 miles apart. We have a plan to make that happen, and our LD online relationship will only last as long as that line does.
2) Intimacy - we cannot be physically intimate on a day to day basis, so we have to be intimate in other ways. We speak, on the phone - usually twice a day, often more, we skype for over an hour before I got to work in the mornings, often more. At the weekend we have been known to clock up 8 hours nattering away to eachother in a day. We email and IM while we are working .,.. and I bombard Him with text messages. We give each other access 24/7 .. I am involved with all the crapola and joy of His life, just as He is with me. I see this constant opportunity for access as very intimate, I am able to hear His voice whenever I want to (though not advised to wake Him) and He can rant at me and idly crush my butterfly like spirit whenever the urge strikes Him
3) Space - Having the man I love on the other side of the world .. is crappy .. like seriously crappy. I go to bed alone, I sleep alone, I wake up alone, I eat alone and I watch TV alone. I am 24 years old, and I live like a nun. I explained it to a friend a few weeks ago - I have all the drawbacks of having a partner ... with none of the perks - - - I cant sleep around, I can't grow out my leg hair, and I cant wear granny pants when no one is looking, but then neither am i getting the sweaty jungle sex, the protective arm around my shoulders, or the warm body to sleep curled up with. As I said .. 24 ... pretty foxy .. and living like a nun. but this is the life I have chosen, I can leave anytime I like. Knowing this doesn't make it any easier. Sir gives me the space to feel that bittersweetness, He doesn't berate me for it, or let it make Him insecure worrying every second I will be drawn away by someone closer to me. Sir gives me the space to socialise both in and out of the scene ... He gives me the space to be 24. This is crucial. If I felt smothered and curtailed, if I felt I was giving over mroe than I was being returned, then things would end very quickly. I cannot speak for Sir, but I hope He feels I encourage Him to make use of the same space, and am content with Him doing so.
With all relationships, but especially for me with long distance, I force myself from time to time to look very coldly at the relationship I am in and ask myself this
Is the price I pay for being His, worth the value of having Him as an Owner? ... Is the sacrifice of having someone with me, of having regular sex and play, of my astronomical phone bill, of stupidly early mornings on skype, of endless endless time apart and just being plain lonely ... is that worth it?
Usually I answer yes, without even needing to think all that long, without doubt every sacrifice is worth being able to be His property. He is my Master, and I am His slave. He owns me, I am His property. it really is as simple and perfect as thatI would be lying though to say I always answer yes, some days it really isn't worth the price, and I think Sir would agree with that - mostly when He has to make His own coffee .. and the meatloaf doggedly refuses to cook itself. .
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