RE: Different strokes for different folks !!

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Different strokes for different folks !!

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Different strokes for different folks !!

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Different strokes for different folks !! - 6/4/2008 7:41:51 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation
His response was 'ok but if Dom 1 plays hard with you why cant i?'

This is a huge red flag to me.... What occurs with others is irrelevant... what matters is what is going to occur between the two of you.

quote:

Truth is i'm not sure why! I know i really like hard play but don't feel that hard play with Dom 2 would be right at this time.

trust your gut and stick to your guns.... and stop trying to figure out why... because it doesn't matter why Dom 2 can play with you like Dom 1.

What matters is what you want from that particular relationship.. if it matches with the other... great.. if not.. move on.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to missturbation)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: Different strokes for different folks !! - 6/4/2008 9:23:04 PM

kyraofMists

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
It's an essential part of polyamory to nurture and treat each relationship as its own unique dynamic (which it is) even as it exists amongst others.

I wanted to piggy back off this comment to add something else...

He, Alandra and I have a relationship together. We also have relationships with each other. Most people who have met us, can easily see the tight bond that we have with each other. However, the relationships that we have are unique. How Alandra and I interact when he is not there is not the same as our interactions when he is there. The same can be said for all of our relationships together.

It isn't about restricting ourselves or restricting interactions we have with each other; it is about appreciating and respecting the uniqueness of the individuals and of the relationships.

I just couldn't imagine it any other way.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: Different strokes for different folks !! - 6/5/2008 6:29:49 AM

RavenMuse

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
It's an essential part of polyamory to nurture and treat each relationship as its own unique dynamic (which it is) even as it exists amongst others.

Bingo. It is always a red flag to Me is someone is doing the comparison thing and expecting things to work the same just because there are superficial simerlaritys.

When I Owned a pair of identical twins.... they where only identical on the outside... whilst they could pull a switch and fool Me for a little while, I could tell which was which because they drew Me in different ways... the chemistry was different.

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Profile

Post #: 23

RE: Different strokes for different folks !! - 6/5/2008 9:31:55 AM

virgini970

Posts: 142
Joined: 5/28/2008
Status: offline

it's just different you guys have been playing hard for so long you have the need to slow down there is nothing roung with that and it has to be some thing you both want and you may trust him in some ways just not in others just yes and he should under stand that and just want to have a good time with out making you fell bad about want to take it slow

(in reply to Prinsexx)

Profile

Post #: 24