RE: Men and Intimacy

RE: Men and Intimacy (Full Version)

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TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Men and Intimacy (5/31/2008 9:15:09 PM)
Well, although I am not male, I would like to chime in with my thoughts: *. What do you define as intimacy?* When you have relaxed enough to let someone see you at your worst moments, either appearance wise or emotional wise.. *2. What is one of the most intimate moments you have ever had?* When my friend of 20 years accepted my hair for a wig, as my locks of love for her... *2. Do you believe that D/s brings you more intimacy?* I think D/s encourages more intimacy as a basic tenant. It still comes down to the dynamics of that relationship..But I also believe that vanilla brings intimacy as well,so it still comes down to the people in the relationship...maybe, it seems to be more prolific in D/s because it is often discussed ,encouraged (without judgement),and often times part of negotiation, whereas with vanilla it is simply assumed and often times misconceptualized.....Tempting

SnowRanger -> RE: Men and Intimacy (5/31/2008 11:13:45 PM)
Men and Intimacy: I'm not the most articulate man in the world; so I had to formulate and reformulate my responces here. Here Goes Defined: A state of mutual openness and understanding. As many of the men here have pointed out; these moments are not always verbal. One of my most intimate moments involved myself, and nineteen other people on a running wildfire we hooked. We had just shared several hours of hard work, frantic activity, and more than a little danger. We found ourselves awe struck at what we'd just witnessed and somewhat astounded at our success. Few words were spoken but many glances were exchanged. A bit later when a tree explo.... Nope, thats a face to face story to be saved for good beer and fine friends. ;-) D/s versus Vanilla: Submission, is seems to me, requires openess. Further, insight and understanding are vital tools for a dominant. However, these are certainly not exclusive to D/s.... On the whole, I disagree with the premise of the questions. Answering the questions was a good excersize in communication. Mike

hardbodysub -> RE: Men and Intimacy (6/1/2008 6:55:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MladyHathor ... *1. What do you define as intimacy?* *2. What is one of the most intimate moments you have ever had?* *2. Do you believe that D/s brings you more intimacy?* 1. The state of something being inside Tim, such as a butt plug. 2. I have never played with anyone named Tim. 2. What? 2 again? I already answered 2! No fair! I'm so confused!

aliasmoniker -> RE: Men and Intimacy (6/1/2008 8:32:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MladyHathor ( This was originally going to be for the male subs/slaves, but I'd like to have all the men weigh in here)---we often accuse men of thinking with one head and it isnt where the brain is---and we often hear that D/s brings more intimacy than a vanilla relationship. ( Note not opinions, not generalist statements---frames of reference only)-- *So given that--and no references to your penis---I'd like to hear:* *1. What do you define as intimacy?* *2. What is one of the most intimate moments you have ever had?* *2. Do you believe that D/s brings you more intimacy?* Saying men think with their dicks is like saying woman don't think, they just express the stages of PMS. I define intimacy as closeness. One of the most intimate moments I ever had was January 12th, 2004 11:13:09-11:14:09 I believe D/s brings me less intimacy. It seems to be cover for people whose problem in the first place is just being themselves.

LPslittleclip -> RE: Men and Intimacy (6/1/2008 11:14:51 AM)
i feel like intimacy is when you feel as your are part of the other emotionally entangled for the mutual strength of the whole one of the most intimate moments was being held by my M'Lady and talking about my past. i think that D/s allows for more trust and with that more intimacy

MidMichCowboy -> RE: Men and Intimacy (6/2/2008 7:39:13 PM)
*1. What do you define as intimacy?* Sharing emotions, drives, passions and ideas with someone as they share with me. Admitting to someone that you have needs the rest of world will not condone or understand and realizing, she does too. *2. What is one of the most intimate moments you have ever had?* I had just ravished my lady, taking her every way, whips, crops, buildup and release. We lay together and we said at the same time "I love you ... thank you". *3. Do you believe that D/s brings you more intimacy?* YES

Suleiman -> RE: Men and Intimacy (6/2/2008 8:43:26 PM)
(Via fast reply) 1) My definition of intimacy is pretty close to the websters definition. I am intimate with those to whom I feel a close friendship. I prefer this sort of social and emotional bond to have already exist before having any sort of sexual relationship. 2) The most intimate moments I've ever had are not anything I am willing to share here. Not that I don't like y'all, but I consider very few of you to be my intimates. 3) I do not believe that any form of BDSM intrinsically inspires greater intimacy than any other sort of relationship. I do think that the potential dangers inherent to what we do makes most people take a little bit longer to get to know their prospective partner. It takes a lot of trust to let someone tie you up, but that trust is not in and of itself real intimacy. You can trust the rollercoaster to be safe enough to ride without ever getting to know every sway and bump on the track. Frankly, it takes a lot of trust to fall in love - which is not the same as intimacy. I know from personal experience that you can fall in love with very little real intimacy. Not everybody is willing to open themselves to the same level of experience. Being intimate requires having a set of mutual experiences and then acting upon them. Some of my most intimate friends are people with whom I will never have sex. It is also possible for you to be intimate with someone who is not intimate with you - if they do not open themselves to the experience, it does not diminish the sense of bonding that you feel, but it will hurt like hell when you find out they didn't get as much out of it.

MrRandallspe -> RE: Men and Intimacy (6/2/2008 9:07:21 PM)
Can B/D bring more intimancy? Humm,,,I feel that it does only if the ones involved have a dedicated relationship and have total trust and honesty. To say that those into B/D have more would not be 100% correct nor would a total vanilla relationship have 100%. It all depends totally upon the ones with-in the relationship. I have seen relationships,both B/D and vanilla fall apart due to the lack of intimancy.

UncleNasty -> RE: Men and Intimacy (6/6/2008 9:03:51 PM)
Intimacy is being safe in being 100% of who and what you are with another, and they with you as well. Uncle Nasty

Hippiekinkster -> RE: Men and Intimacy (6/7/2008 3:23:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: christine1 intimacy is what i crave when i'm alone. yes, nasty sex too, but mostly just intimacy. to me that means sharing the good and bad in a very personal way and still wanting each other. When you get all stressed out, baby, remember I taught you how to make good Sauerkraut. Don't lose perspective.

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