To tell or not to tell??

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To tell or not to tell?? - 4/28/2008 12:03:08 PM

slaverosebeauty

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About 2 months ago, I discovered a lump [about the size of a large grape cut in half], and after waiting a month to see if it went away, my gp decided I needed an ultra-sound; and with the media attention in my area about breast cancer; we weren't taking any chances. I fall into one of the smallest catagories but it was still a chance. The ultra-sound showed something and after a biopsy earlier this month, we have the results, [not cancer].

Since my breast is still healing I have stopped my search for a Master since it's not exactly something most men would want to deal with, a slave who cannot have their breasts played with due to the ultra-sensativity and pain meds. I decided to try to date vanilla men for the time being, and keep my eyes open for a Master if he comes around, but as I meet these nilla guys, I get asked why I'm [obviously] not wearing a bra [wearing camis and things with built-in support instead].

I want to be honest about this, since it's nothing to be ashamed of, but should I tell? Do Top-types care about this??

I decided to NOT remove the lump, so it will be there when I do play again or I am intimate with someone; any suggestons on how I should address that?

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RE: To tell or not to tell?? - 4/28/2008 12:11:05 PM

PanthersMom

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just say they're uncomfortable and leave it at that. no reason for a man to be commenting on a lady's choice of undergrments anyway!
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RE: To tell or not to tell?? - 4/28/2008 12:13:10 PM

domiguy

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Most intelligent and sane people like to play with other intelligent and sane people...So, regardless of whether you have damaged tits or not this should be your focus and concern.

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RE: To tell or not to tell?? - 4/28/2008 12:26:18 PM

Mercnbeth

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rose,
First and foremost - "...after a biopsy earlier this month, we have the results, [not cancer]." That is GREAT news! I hope you are celebrating.

Second, we (yes WE because we went through it together) experienced the same thing last year. beth and I found a lump and needed diagnosis through ultra sound. Also similarly it was benign. It was, and is a 'Fibroadenma'; a function of her 'dense' breast tissue. Just last week we had our 1 year follow up. Although benign they need to check growth and fortunately this year's ultra sound determined that it didn't grow enough to consider having it removed.

In beth's case, she had similar pain due to the biopsy, and still has her pin-sized 'scar'. she's always experiences some tenderness; but its never been a deterrent to our play.

Regarding how others will react to you well, considering my personal preference you inability to wear a bra would be viewed as a plus! Seriously, though my response to disclosure would be no different regarding any personal, physical, aspect. You shouldn't introduce yourself by saying; "Hi, my name is rose, I've just had a breast biopsied and it hurts." However, when you get beyond that stage and are considering a relationship and/or play, you should disclose it and talk about it.

Do Top-types care about this?? Sure they do! If it becomes a deal breaker it only says that you may want to reconsider your current screening process.

I want to be honest about this, since it's nothing to be ashamed of, but should I tell? Never compromise or put yourself in a position to question your own integrity. Consider the alternative, you don't tell and the thought of the potential pain, or the pain itself, prevents your ability to experience pleasure. Is that worth the lie of omission?

Again - you got GOOD NEWS! Short term there is sensitivity and some pain which will dictate avoiding some forms of 'play'. It's not forever and doesn't, and shouldn't, effect your most important erogenous zone - your mind.

If you want any of the details regarding beth's perspective, feel free to contact her on the other side of CM.

Take care!

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 4/28/2008 12:33:09 PM >

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RE: To tell or not to tell?? - 4/28/2008 12:50:31 PM

DesFIP

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You have fibroids, non cancerous. Congrats on the results being negative.

Lots of us have fibroid lumps. If it causes you a lot of pain then maybe you'll want to reconsider not having it removed. Otherwise, it's just like mentioning a bum knee. You may want to mention it, as in no severe caning of the breast because of this. But kinky or not it's likely a guy will feel that lump. He'll get bent out of shape worried about the big C, so if you mention it matter of factly it will reassure him.

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RE: To tell or not to tell?? - 4/28/2008 1:05:40 PM

pahunkboy

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Diamonds are a girls best friend... :-)

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RE: To tell or not to tell?? - 4/28/2008 2:55:16 PM

ownedgirlie

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If you left the lump in tact it sounds like you had a stereotactical biopsy (needle biopsy)? If that's the case, you should be back in shape in no time, and can still play hard with the breasts (according to my OBGYN after I had that same kind of biopsy).

6 months later it was necessary for me to have the lump removed, however, and it took about 6 months to begin to feel "back to normal" again. It has been nearly a year now, and my scars are nearly non existant now.

If you have any uncertainty, yes, tell prospective dominants.

Most importantly, CONGRATULATIONS on being cancer free! I know it's a big relief!

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RE: To tell or not to tell?? - 4/28/2008 4:26:19 PM

christine1

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OP, i've gone through this as well and there is hardly a scar anymore...i had the lump removed and it was sore for a few months. i don't consider myself damaged in anyway and if this bothered a future man/dominant then they could move on, so far it hasn't been a problem with anyone, hell it hasn't even been an issue in the tiniest respect.

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