RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (Full Version)

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LaTigresse -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 10:30:13 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Zensee

Big Momma's watching you!

Actually the holder of the mortgage at my house has no such right, legal or moral, since I pay the friggin' rent. If the OP pays any room or board their privacy comes with it. How about a little respect for other people for a change (and kids are people, at any age)?

Some people here have real control issues, apparently. You've got to stop being mommy sometime. When your kids reach majority seems like a good time to cut the apron strings.


Z.


I stopped being a mommy when my children began acting like adults. aka........got adult jobs and their own home. In my home it is my home and my rules. I have every right to inspect every inch of my home. If it is a single family dwelling I am LEGALLY responsible for every item and every action that is contained within that dwelling. If I feel there is something within that dwelling that will put ME at risk with the law, it is my responsibility to deal with it. Otherwise, I am held liable as though I was the one that brought it in. There is a big difference legally, between being a landlord and charging your kids $50.00 a week to live at home.

Example: 20 yo child brings illegal substance into dwelling and stashes it in his trunk. Invites friend over and they partake of said substance. Friend leaves house and gets pulled over by police. Friend tells police where he got substance. Police obtain search warrant to enter MY dwelling........ etc etc etc. Worst case scenario, I could spend time behind bars AND lose my home.

Yeah, I will be happy to be called a control freak, over bearing, bitch, momma. I like my happy home.

Fortunately, my two adult children have worked hard and now own their own happy homes.




Lynnxz -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 10:33:58 AM)

If you don't like the place you are at now, put forth the effort to change it. Simple.




LaTigresse -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 10:39:21 AM)

OMG, they might not be able to afford cable tv or internet service, living on their own!! The world would come to an end.




YourhandMyAss -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 11:52:29 AM)

LA that comment is kind of condesending, cause for some it's not just cable they couldn't afford. I get 800 a month, rent is either right at 800 or is more. Plus  most places have a 3 times the amount of income rule,  your income has to double the amount of rent.

I am not really capable of holding down most jobs, with my disabilities and other stuff, So I am stuck to a paycheck  amonth from SSI.

Now should I have to get an apartment even with a room mate I wouldn't be able to afford anything. You either pay your rent or you eat. not both.

My Dominant and I are looking for apartments, we're gonna need three thoughsand dollars before we can even BEGIN to think about a place. And we're looking at bare bone minimum, 2 rooms and it's not a roach motel.
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

OMG, they might not be able to afford cable tv or internet service, living on their own!! The world would come to an end.




christine1 -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 12:01:53 PM)

YHMA, LaT's comments were not condescending at all, they were realistic.  cable and  internet are not needs.  now, what you talk about with rent and stuff is necessary.  rent, transportation,  food, plumbing, heat, that is necessary.  cable and internet aren't....i think what most of the "moms" here are saying is, if, as an adult, you live in my house that i busted my ass for, then follow the rules, if you can't follow the rules then make it on your own, but don't cry and complain about not having cable and internet.

i hear you on how expensive it is to find a place and having to make 3 times what your monthly rent is...i'm doing that kind of thing on my own, believe me..i get what you are saying.




YourhandMyAss -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 12:31:05 PM)

I agree cable isn't nessisary neither is new tools and toys and gadgets. I do know some people do choose the easy rout and do stay home cause single life in your own place doesn't offer all the perks mommies house does.

quote:

ORIGINAL: christine1

YHMA, LaT's comments were not condescending at all, they were realistic.  cable and  internet are not needs. 




littlewonder -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 1:39:42 PM)

It's your mother's house. She can do as she likes. Don't like it? You're 20. Get a job and get an apartment or if you're in college, look into the dorms or stay with friends your own age but otherwise unless you're paying rent...her house, her rules.




LotusSong -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 2:21:00 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: conatus

well as nice as it can be sometimes to live at home with parents it tends to make ones kinkster lifestyle difficult.  over the last day or so ive had the ambition to tell my mom about my kinks,  i just dont know how to go about it.  before i put a lock on my bedroom door i know she snooped and saw/found things that would hit towards some of my kinks.  i just dont know how far her knolage goes.  i dont realy want to share every detail, but i want enough so she is not constatly wondering ( and snooping more).   im sure im not the only one who has gone through this,  i would like to know how to go about it and how others reacted.


If you walk the walk you better talk the talk.  It comes with maturity and with that comes accountability.  If you can't handle that, then you are just too young to be messing with it all. On the upside, your youth will probably cover it as a "phase" you are going through and your partent's concern will be based on if you are being safe or not.
 
If you want to run with the big dogs, you gotta leave the porch.




MasterKalif -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 2:35:10 PM)

While I see many people's point that if the kid does not like it to move out...many don't seem to think that there is more of a bond between mother and son or between mother and daughter and neither will want to just part ways or make it a money issue...I suppose for me it came naturally as I moved away for college...and then after that started living on my own. While I think the mother does have a right to look around or pick stuff up in the room of the son or daughter, she does have togive the "children" some privacy...just my two cents.




slaveboyforyou -> RE: im 20 and live with my parents need advice (4/27/2008 3:58:15 PM)

Years ago, my mother found some "novelties" in a drawer in my apartment.  She wasn't snooping.  My mother is a big time clean freak.  She has this habit of wanting to clean up when she visits.  I asked her not to do it repeatedly, but what am I going to do?  It's my mom.  I am not going to yell at her for trying to be helpful.  Anyway, it wasn't that big of a deal.  It was a collar and cuffs set and a flogger someone had given me.  I just told her they were gag gifts and shut the drawer.  I don't think she believed me, but nothing else was said about it.  It's not like she found a pound of heroin in there. 

I'm pretty sure my father stumbled onto some S&M website I had bookmarked when he used my computer years ago.  Again he didn't say anything.  Of course, my parents never wanted to know about my sex life.  They respected my privacy and never gave me the birds and bees talk as a teenager. 

Now if I was living in their house, I would have to keep my things in a locked trunk.  I would never try to bring home women for play or sex.  I just think that's disrespectful.  Motel rooms don't cost that much, man.  Don't put a lock on your bedroom door, that will just make her more suspicious.  She might start thinking you are a junkie.  Keep your stuff at a friend's house, or just put them away in a box until you move. 




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