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Termyn8or -> RE: shutting someone out rant (4/23/2008 7:47:32 AM)
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My Mother would KILL me if she had no kitchen sink for six months. Either that or she would plot for me a fate worse than death. (probably show up with scissors demanding my testicles or something like that lol)
A kitchen sink can be a sore spot for us, because of what happened years ago. I tore her kitchen out and found a gaping hole under it where there was supposed to be floor. It was a mess. Of course it took longer than expected because I had to fix the floor, which involved replacing about ¼ of it.
I also had to rerun the drain all the way to the main stack. I also had to upgrade her electrical panel to accomodate more circuits and a 220 line for the new central AC. And due to conditions, everything had to be in conduit.
While she can pottymouth with the best of us (oh and we are the best), she has this tone of voice, it's partial anger and partial being on the verge of tears, and she does not cuss when she gets in that mode. I would rather listen to a thousand fingernails dragged across a chalkboard than to hear this.
Anyway, shutting people out, blood means nothing. You don't want friends to drag you down, I see no reason to let family do it.
And chosen family can be just as bad. I got a few of those I choose not to speak with. One guy drinks too much, now mind you I drink, but there are limits. This guy can drive, walk, do just about anything. But his mentality becomes that of a little kid.
Oh, and the thousand dollar toilet, tell her to tell him to shove it up his, well just make sure it does not get a sunburn. My buddy schooled me on this when I went to buy one. None of them use over two gallons of water to flush so what are you buying ? Junk. It's not that you are buying junk, but you are paying about five times what something is worth.
Nominal surface area of water in the bowl is a big thing, a very important spec. The bigger the better. And I don't see any reason to pay more than $200 for something you are going to shit and piss in. Mine was $160 and it is fine.
Your Mother is a Woman I presume, as such I can't see how she would ever put up with not having a kitchen sink for more than a few days. Is this an issue destined for Judge Judy or something ?
And if your bro works so much, why doesn't he just pay someone to finish the job ? When I don't have the time to do something, that's what I do. Actually anything I don't feel like doing.
One thing's for sure, when someone gives you grief, there is nothing wrong with returning the favor. And don't lament or fret about it, you think they are when they do it to you ? Hell no. One of the things I would say to him is "Yeah, and the old phrase 'everything but the kitchen sink' takes on a whole new fucking meaning with you doesn't it !".
Watch out when you take my advice though, I come from a family of very competitive people, to the point almost of being adversarial, but certainly to the point of being quite critical of one another.
And the thing is with people who are drinking, some listen, some do not. Your words might just go out the other ear.
Actually I must admit that CM helped me. I try to use CM rules in an adversary situation. Let's say the guy is a workaholic and a drunk. Well he either knows that or he doesn't. So calling him that is futile. If he knows it, he'll just say "yup" and your words go out the other ear. If he doesn't know it he is not going to believe you and again, out the other ear.
Like here, if you think someone's viewpoint is stupid, you don't just come out and say it. Just state your case and let the conclusions be drawn by the readers. In this case it would be listeners I guess but it boils down to the same thing.
And everything boils down to this, if you think you are wrong, I really don't know what to say. But if you think you are right don't let them beat you down, don't take any shit from anyone except occasionally from your boss if you did fuck up.
If he seems to be drinking alot, well maybe you need to quaff a couple and then call him. Heaven forbid he be sober and have to listen to you for a change. I didn't say get falling down, rip roarin' piss on the floorin' drunk. Just enough to adjust your attitude for the conditions that are coming.
T
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