Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? - 3/27/2008 1:28:01 AM   
DelilahDeb


Posts: 429
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline
I do not see subspace as a stop sign; more as a caution signal.  A sub in subspace may not be verbal at all, for instance, so all the responsibility for observing safe limits devolves to me for the duration. A diabetic in subspace may float right past a needed dose of insulin...or a hypoglycemic past the need for some protein.  The fairly standard quiz for any masseuse seeing a new client is a guideline I try to use, so that I don't bump into surprises--any old or recent injuries I need to know about, any current medications, etc. (An ex-husband with a seizure disorder had once had a shoulder dislocated by some fool cop trying to hold him down (thinking that it was an LSD flashback, but it was a damn stupid move even if he'd been correct).

Nervous moments:  I once had a sub fall completely into what I would call a state of hypnotic regression (to a childhood traumatic event) and the moment sub called me "Mommy", I knew that sub was not with me even in subspace (I never MommyDomme). Rather than try to yank the sub out suddenly, we rode the event through together--I made sure of sub's physical safety and allowed sub's cues to guide my actions (extremely minor contact) until sub reached a catharsis moment--successfully breaking free of one cuff in the process! (What can I say, I had to wear both the domina hat AND the priestess hat at the same time.)  Once the sub was back with me, sub proved me correct:  there was no recall of the statements, typical of hypnotic regression in some therapeutic modes. (Yikes, I thought!)  So I made absolutely certain, first, that sub was mentally and emotionally back and physically here and now...and then, in gentle aftercare chit-chat, as sub said something about embarrassing itself, there was my opening, and I reminded sub that you never, never, blame the victim.  The remainder of that chunk of aftercare constituted pastoral counseling more than kinky aftercare.   Once again, I'm glad that I took time out from exploring the scene a decade back to conclude my priestess training...because it keeps coming in useful in the Scene and in the scenes.

Delilah Deb

_____________________________

"All acts of love & pleasure are My rituals."
--from the Charge of the Goddess, a Wiccan teaching

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? - 3/27/2008 7:08:59 AM   
subseeks1


Posts: 30
Joined: 3/12/2008
Status: offline
Soooo agree with that littlebitxxx
Its best when  its a long ride.
Have started video taping things in the past so i can watch it later.....because i rarely remember much when its going on.

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlebitxxx

Stop when entering subspace?!?  Gawd No!  That's too much like coitus interruptus! 


_____________________________

"Dont make someone a priority in your life that has only made you an option in theirs." ~~Maya Angelou~~

"Whatever you are, be a good one" ~~Mark Twain~~

(in reply to littlebitxxx)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? - 3/27/2008 7:46:07 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Having had the pleasure of scening with a fair number of doms over the years and watching many, many more scene with their subs I have noticed that a lot of doms seriously curtail their actions or even completely stop the moment they realize their sub has entered space. I've also, thankfully, scened with dominants who know how to use sensation to guide and prolong subspace for an extended period of time.

Do you stop when your subs enters space and if so why? Or do you guide the ride?

Subs, do you prefer your dominant to stop as soon as you enter space or do you prefer to take a long, guided trip?


It depends on the circumstances of the scene each time.  Like some, I view it as a Caution sign of entering New Territory.  Sometimes, you can use that space to explore things that have been consented to though I am not big on pushing limits in that space because of the potential for damage; if I do push limits, they know beforehand that if they get to space, I am going to push something...with extreme care.  Sometimes though, once they have reached this space, that is when I begin to bring them down by becoming more sexual.  Sometimes the space is an endpoint and I will do very little while they are there though I never stop activities completely...just begin to decrease the intensity as I move towards ending the scene.



(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? - 3/27/2008 8:36:46 AM   
ExSteelAgain


Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline
It varies, including whether she gets there or not. If she does space and I want to keep her there, I will greatly reduce the intensity of the flogging. I will flog lightly from then on because it is my experience that light plays works better when she is in a spaced state. Of course I can work hard things around her spaced state also.

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to CreativeDominant)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? - 3/27/2008 1:56:33 PM   
kallisto


Posts: 1185
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Subs, do you prefer your dominant to stop as soon as you enter space or do you prefer to take a long, guided trip?


What a great way to express it.   I much prefer the long, guided tour.   Lessening the intensity keeps me in the place He takes me too. 

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? - 3/27/2008 2:16:21 PM   
MariaIsabel


Posts: 57
Joined: 11/11/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin
Subs, do you prefer your dominant to stop as soon as you enter space or do you prefer to take a long, guided trip?

if i get in sub space and he knows it i would love for it to be long and guided as long as my body doesnt start to hurt in a bad pain, because i dont get to be in sub space very long or very often. i dont even know if i have truely experienced sub space yet but i might have.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? - 3/27/2008 2:22:59 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline
My Sir is a sadist, and so, when I hit subspace, and no longer feel the pain of the impact of the cane, he typically stops - because he isn't hurting me any more.
Once he kept on caning me, and pulled me out of subspace, and  I so did not enjoy that - but that wasn't my decision.         ...                  damn!

and yelling at the Dom during a scene?  -  I go through a period of fighting and yelling when I am heading for subspace, where the caning hurts like hell. I don't yell at my Sir (at least, not if I know what is good for me!), but it might sound disrespectful to others. Actually, my Sir likes to know he is hurting his girls, so he enjoys the yelling.  Don't know what the neighbours think though - lol.

(in reply to kallisto)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? - 3/27/2008 7:18:53 PM   
night101owl


Posts: 83
Joined: 8/15/2005
Status: offline
I think it depends on what you're playing for. If the play is for a sadist to seek pleasure, then she probably isn't going let the bottom drift in a tranquil high. Personally, my partner likes to keep me engaged, and if I get all spacey, she does something to make me scream.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? - 3/27/2008 10:35:49 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
erin,
 
For me, it depends on the sub, the goal of play, their positioning, and their personal reaction to subspace.  If subspace is the goal of play then I will guide them through as long a ride as the two of us can stand.  As has been mentioned, subspace can be a good place to explore the edges with out nervousness.  If subspace isn't the goal, then I just have to find a way to *snap* them out of it!
 


_____________________________

Tress


"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 49
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Doms...do you see subspace as a stop sign? Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094