Subs list for sucess

Subs list for sucess (Full Version)

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LATEXBABY64 -> Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 8:11:22 AM)
In the past we have seen post about submission and slaves being a gift. Also the domanence is a gift. Lets say for a moment that it is what two put into it that makes it speacil.!! We can redefine this any way you want. I use the kiss method for success on either side of the fence (keep it simple stupid) For true sucess or at least a great chance in it you have to understand you. what are your values what is your goals or future plans what things you struggle with sheading of the past what your willing to accept in someone else and not stablity health and fiscal everything has cause and effect. When your sub you look for someone in a different ways to do certian things for you. as does a domme, dom . You will see on here people going there is no certian right way or wrong way to be in this lifestyle. HOW ever there is a certain right way and wrong way to live. taking care of your responsiblites is up to you this is a big one people seem to give this up to the dominate partner like they are suppose to be the fix all problem solver. You would be suprised doms dommes are not perfect lol . Do not expect them to fix you. It is up to you to take care of your life. Just because you have ums and have been through divocres and addictions and other things does not mean your not accountable

MontrealPhoenix -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 9:03:32 AM)
Please, i beg of you.....run a spellcheck. Most of this is impossible to understand. Thank you, Phoenix

HerLord -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 9:09:50 AM)
Again with the quote: "Did it feel good? Do it again." .

Kitte9 -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 9:31:52 AM)
Despite the grammatical errors, I think you are spot-on with this assessment.

SinergyNstrumpet -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 10:10:51 AM)
quote: everything has cause and effect. When your sub you look for someone in a different ways to do certian things for you. as does a domme, dom . You will see on here people going there is no certian right way or wrong way to be in this lifestyle. HOW ever there is a certain right way and wrong way to live. * taking care of your responsiblites is up to you this is a big one people seem to give this up to the dominate partner like they are suppose to be the fix all problem solver. You would be suprised doms dommes are not perfect lol . Do not expect them to fix you. It is up to you to take care of your life. Just because you have ums and have been through divocres and addictions and other things does not mean your not accountable There is a saying, two halves do not make a whole, but they do make a hole to fall into. I agree with that assessment for the most part. I do not expect others to take responsibility for me. At the same time the idea of making a life with someone that expected that they would never have to stand beside me when issues arose in my life is rather off putting to me. Why have a partner if they aren't there for you when things go bad? I have the natural inclination to do all I can for the person I am submitting to. I am a natural caregiver. If they do not feel that they would want to take care of me or return the favor if it became necessary... what the fuck would I want that person for? I think being independent is wonderful. But there comes a time when one trades independence for something more substantial. Now some people think they can have it both ways... be a self sustaining person giving nothing and taking nothing from the other person in their life unless it is "fluffy"... if their partner truly needs something from them, then they are all of the sudden "needy" and not worthy of them... all of the sudden the relationship is not one of independence anymore. I have seen this happen to many people. Once the going gets tough, their mate is gone. I desire a relationship that is interdependent. I desire to have that person that will shoulder my burdens, but I am shouldering theirs at the same time. I desire to entwine my life with another person. Now, that kinda flies in the face of the point of view that if they have a problem, it is all theirs and it isn't my concern. If they have UM problems, those problems become mine. If they have economic woes, those woes become mine.. if we are sharing a life, we are sharing it all... just my thoughts on the topic. julia Edited to add... some doms get off on fixing a submissive, and the sub likes that too. It is their kink...their kink is not my kink, but their kink is still ok. In other words, it satisfies the needs that they have.. one needing to be fixed and the other being fixer.. who am I to say it is wrong?

faerytattoodgirl -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 10:21:41 AM)
5 types of bread as many types of condiments as possible lots and lots of meat as many types of veggies as possible diet pepsi salt n vinegar pringles chocolate bar of choice

stella41b -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 10:51:27 AM)
I get the drift. However to me the right way to live for anyone is to be yourself openly and honestly, be responsible for yourself and all which emanates from you, and committing yourself to living in a way which is appropriate and normal for you. I don't see submission or dominance as a gift. It's just part of a transaction or an exchange between two people who wish to complete the transaction and share the experience of that exchange and relationship together for the benefit of both. I understand where the people who think that submission is a gift are coming from, in that it is more important to make the Dominant an offer and be willing to give, but if it is a gift then surely it's a gift with strings attached? I see a difference between being openminded about expectations and having no expectations. I don't believe that anyone goes into a relationship without having any expectations. Indeed, there's quite a few threads here from people who have given their 'gift' but who are terribly unhappy with what they receive in return.

Mercnbeth -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 11:07:22 AM)
this slave surrendered anything prefaced with the personal pronoun "her" to Master when she became Master's slave, from posessions to responsibilities. her life isn't "hers", anymore...it is His, to conduct as He sees fit. He has taken responsibility for this slave's life and has given this slave responsibilities that are pleasing to Him. we didn't speak of "gifting" each other with dominance or submission, or "fixing" each other---and for those that do, more power to them...it just wasn't/isn't our perspective.

sblady -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 11:54:00 AM)
I'm relatively new to the whole D/s dynamic. When I first became interested, I read everything I could and as a result, I romanticized D/s quite a bit. I clearly admit that I had a fantasy image in my mind of how a D/s relationship should be and in the beginning, this way of thinking caused quite a few problems. I'm certainly old enough to realize that some of my views were totally unrealistic, but D/s and BDSM can make you forget everything (for a little while at least). As someone said to me "this can be pretty heady stuff" as I experienced sub-frenzy to the nth degree. There were many times I expected my Dom to "fix" things and I'd become frustrated or angry when He couldn't or wouldn't as it really wasn't His issue and it was something that I would/should/could have handled quite well in the past. The level on which I elevated Him was "my Knight in Shining Armor". I'd read about other relationships and I'd want to pattern my relationship to match those who were obviously more experienced as it was the one "true" way. I've learned that the only "true" way is the one that works best in my relationship. I'm very thankful that my Sir has an infinite amount of patience as I'd attempted to revolve my life around Him and He was quite firm that I maintain certain aspects of my independence (which prior to meeting Him, I'd worn the independent label proudly, almost as a banner around my neck). He is always available as a sounding board and/or to instruct and advise where necessary, and He does it in a way which allows me to have a certain degree of comfort that He's fully capable and willing to step in when I'm unable to handle a situation (this has been evident many times, especially within the past couple of months). Since then, I've stepped out of the "fantasy" and am living the "reality". Sure, the fantasy is better played out, but the reality is much more fulfilling. I realize that I still have a long journey as I have a lot to learn; but I recognize that my desire to learn and be the best that I can for Him as well as myself will only make our bond stronger.

LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 11:58:11 AM)
In the past we have seen post about submission and slaves being a gift. Also the dominance is a gift. Let’s say for a moment that it is what two put into it that makes it special.!! We can redefine this any way you want. I use the kiss method for success on either side of the fence (keep it simple stupid) For true success or at least a great chance in it you have to understand you. what are your values what is your goals or future plans what things you struggle with shedding of the past what your willing to accept in someone else and not stability health and fiscal Everything has cause and effect. When you are a sub you look for someone in a different ways to do certain things for you. as does a domme, dom . You will see on here people going there is no certian right way or wrong way to be in this lifestyle. HOW ever there is a certain right way and wrong way to live. taking care of your responsibilities is up to you this is a big one people seem to give this up to the dominate partner like they are suppose to be the fix all problem solver. You would be surprised doms dommes are not perfect lol . Do not expect them to fix you. It is up to you to take care of your life. Just because you have ums and have been through divorces and addictions and other things does not mean your not accountable I type very very fast and forget my fingers gets ahead of my mind s lol

TheLookingGirl -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 12:24:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl 5 types of bread as many types of condiments as possible lots and lots of meat as many types of veggies as possible diet pepsi salt n vinegar pringles chocolate bar of choice Great. Now I'm insane with hunger. shakes fist

stella41b -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 12:30:13 PM)
True success is achieved from learning to fuck up your own failures and mistakes.

kallisto -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 1:10:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: stella41b True success is achieved from learning to fuck up your own failures and mistakes. I have to admit I had to read this a few times. I kept wanting to rework the wording, but it finally hit me. Very true words. Nice way to put it. [:)]

faerytattoodgirl -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 1:39:18 PM)
hunger for me?[8\|][8\|]

LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 1:47:36 PM)
wait food ?

UncleNasty -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 3:28:10 PM)
Accountability. Accountability to ourselves and to the others in our lives. I see it as a keystone for functional and healthy relationships. Without it what is the point of being involved with another? Just a good opportunity to relive our favorite bad feelings. This lifestyle presents myriad ways for people to avoid being accountable, all with an illusion fo extreme levels of accountability.

MontrealPhoenix -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 7:27:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LATEXBABY64 In the past we have seen post about submission and slaves being a gift. Also the dominance is a gift. Let’s say for a moment that it is what two put into it that makes it special.!! We can redefine this any way you want. I use the kiss method for success on either side of the fence (keep it simple stupid) For true success or at least a great chance in it you have to understand you. what are your values what is your goals or future plans what things you struggle with shedding of the past what your willing to accept in someone else and not stability health and fiscal Everything has cause and effect. When you are a sub you look for someone in a different ways to do certain things for you. as does a domme, dom . You will see on here people going there is no certian right way or wrong way to be in this lifestyle. HOW ever there is a certain right way and wrong way to live. taking care of your responsibilities is up to you this is a big one people seem to give this up to the dominate partner like they are suppose to be the fix all problem solver. You would be surprised doms dommes are not perfect lol . Do not expect them to fix you. It is up to you to take care of your life. Just because you have ums and have been through divorces and addictions and other things does not mean your not accountable I type very very fast and forget my fingers gets ahead of my mind s lol Ahhhh, that's better! I'm a great believer in personal accountability. And yes, finding a dom/domina or sub (as the case may be) won't fix what's wrong in your life any better than alcohol or drugs. I believe that we need to make sure our lives are straightened up before any new relationship is started. Otherwise the problems just follow and eat at the relationship. Geez LB that's what Spellchecker was invented for ;) Phoenix

tahlly -> RE: Subs list for sucess (3/16/2008 7:31:08 PM)
A list for success? The only thing I would put on such a list is 1) be myself Nothing else is needed.

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