stella41b
Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007 From: SW London (UK) Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: SubbieOnWheels That's what safewords and safe calls are for. If you don't know, a safeword is what you say when the play is going farther than you expected and you feel in danger or extremely uncomfortable. (I'm sure I'm gonna see corrections to this, and definitions that are more exact - please feel free.) A safe call is where you set it up with a friend that you will call at a certain time. Have a code word set up that if you say that code word the friend knows you're in trouble. If you don't call at that time, or if you give the code word, the friend calls in the Cavalry. Whatever you do, be sure someone knows where you are going so that if the safe call is needed, they know where to find you. Also, don't play with someone without having name, address, phone number - some way that he/she can be located if needed. Sounds terribly untrusting and unsub-like, but it's your safety we're talking about. This is untrusting and unsub-like? How about getting to know a person sans label whether it be sub, Dom, switch, or whatever and waiting until you don't really need any safewords at all? What if you're so afraid or in so much pain you cannot get the safeword out? What if there's a misunderstanding? What if when there's a misunderstanding there's no understanding to fall back on? Please don't get me wrong, the vast majority of people who use safewords do so without ever experiencing problems and good luck to them. But whenever you're in a situation where you need a safeword it's also important to remember that a safeword does not guarantee absolute safety and there is some element of risk involved.
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