quote:

ORIGINAL: Reflectivesoul

Dv, shawn and I had a discussion a few days ago that has left me wondering how the rest of the people in D/s view their particular play times.
 
My questions are based on a semi-casual play partner, meaning you know this person, have some sort of relationship with them ( friend for example but not boyfriend/girlfriend) and you choose to play with them but still remain only as a "friend", be is because of circumstances or distance or whatever. Also by sexless I do NOT mean that there is no sexual contact, what I do mean is that there is no penile to vaginal penetration.
 
Now that being said, the point of the post is I'm wondering how many of you seperate sex from your D/s play, how many of you see it as a vital part of your play, and how many/who expects it to be part of any D/s relationship they are in.
 
For the male submissives do you expect that when you meet a FemDom that she will eventually sleep with you, if not right away she surely will? Do you set expectations or limits that if there is no involved sex then there is no play?
 
For me personally I have a very rigid rule of no sex with someone that is a casual play partner, I have found this to be a difficult rule to have sink into many of the males that I know. They either end up with some deluded idea that *I* just havent met the right one, or for some reason that its a challenge to see if they can break that rule, but either way I find it highly disrespectful considering that anyone I meet is informed that I have no intentions of sleeping with them. Its caused a few really nasty seperations when someone has misconstrued the idea because I still play with them.  I feel that as a basic human right, you have the right to say NO and to put forth a limit on how far *you* personally are willing to go, just as a submissive sets their hard limits, why is it that people think that *My* sex limit would be any different than that?
 
Anyhow I look forward to hearing what you all have to say and hopefully this will cease to be such a nagging pain in my side...
 
~RS~

quote:

ORIGINAL: Reflectivesoul

Hi Raven  ( how ya been, and its great to see you again, been ages )
 
And see thats where the problem is, I tell them til I am blue in the face not to expect what I have already told them is NOT going to happen, but in the end I have had more than one pull a " rabbit" out of the hat. I've had it happen before hand ( atleast these ones I can tell to take a hike so it makes that a bit easier but still in the beginning its " oh thats fine thats ok I accept that, then BLAM), I've had it happen durring play time, hell its happend after play time, and someone ends up jaded....
 
( no offence guys I promise but I'm gonna use a blanket generalization here )
 
The way that it comes off to me a lot of the times is that " if my dick is hard it better get fucked"
 
And in my eyes, sorry that is your problem not mine, I was clear in what I wanted and you're ass outta luck.