quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Well, I guess it does have its charms, you wouldn't have to kiss it right away after it blew you........so thats a plus right there.

Ron 

quote:

ORIGINAL: Scarlet28

I mean no malice, or disrespect.  All I ask is that you consider another perspective.

Most of you have been placed in unfamiliar situations.  Scary, isn't it?  Even with outgoing personalities.

Some of the bottom personals on this site are people completely new to The Lifestle.  Add the threat of cultural taboo.  Social backlash.  Recluctant "outing".  The not-knowing when it comes to the people you are speaking with on the internet.  Online dating is risky is it's own right.  Lifestyle dating?  Even harder.

I'm a submissive unwilling to relocate or travel, yet I'm still on the site.  Why even put myself out there?  I wish to learn from those who have experience.  Now that I've chosen to recognize and embrace it, this lifestyle is will be apart of my life forever.  It is who I am -- yet, that doesn't mean I'm willing to jump into something with someone in the near future.  I wish to learn and grow.

Online dating is hard enough.  Lifestyle dating?  Even harder.  This site is free -- as many of you have mentioned -- and therein lies the risk of those who either don't understand/don't care.

There are those who look at these sites in search of those who will withstand their emotional/physical/mental abuse easier than the average Joe.  These people are abusers, not Lifestylers.  They are predators.  Am I being paranoid?  Yes.  Am I being unrealistic?  No.

That's enough to make anyone reluctant.

No one person is alike.  We're all in different stages in our lifes.  Whether we are new, looking, experimenting, growing.  For all of those angry from messages left unrepsonded:  Did you really read their profile?  Grasp what they are looking for?  Did you relate to what they were looking for?  Were you local, and if not, did they say they were willing to relocate?

If there is no profile, and you are serious, why are you contacting them?  It doesn't make sense.

People are people.  There could be extreme social and familial repercussions for coming out as kinky, or a slave, or a submissive, *insert label here*.  We are not blow-up dolls, with no lives, no connections, no friendships.  There is more to a BDSM relationship than a few messages exchanged on some site.  It takes an amazing commitment to be a submissive, especially a slave.  There has to be an undeniable connection to even want to meet in person.  If they back out?  Oh-friggin-well.  Move on.  There's someone else just waiting for your message.

Anyways, the point of my post is that there is more to the story then most consider.  Period.

I wish you luck, all of you, on the search that completes Who You Are.  Just don't be so judgemental, so discouraged, so bitter, over failed communications.  It's the internet -- what can you expect? 

quote:

 Even with my LD friendships, some of them have slowly faded and some of them have become much deeper and personal.  So regardless if one is using this site for making friends, finding somebody for serious LT relationship, or even the proverbial fuck buddy.   The dynamics of making a connection still all apply.   We all are human with different desires, needs, wants and interests.