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thougts on age - 2/5/2008 7:33:03 AM   
mhawk


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i am just curious to others thoughts on this.actually everyones be it Masters,Mistresses,Submissives,slave and switches.

from time to time here and on other boards i see the question coming from some of 'why is it so hard for the young"? i can understand the question there,we were all young once.

but what i am really wondering in all of this is it's not so much something i have had dificulty with but just as a thought for everyone,how about those who are much older when they discover who and what they really are.i'm sure most answers will be the same but i would like to see others "stories" and thoughts on older people let's say in their mid 30's and up who are looking for the frst time.

i'll say for myself it wasn't easy because i don't like to go and do group functions so my search and info was gained online.my first M/s did not go well but now i have found who and where i belong and it is more than i could have ever hoped for and work on this more every day.and in as such i have grown to care and cherish my Lord and His wofe/my Mistress more and more as we we continue to grow together.
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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 7:41:44 AM   
OmegaG


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quote:

ORIGINAL: mhawk

i am just curious to others thoughts on this.actually everyones be it Masters,Mistresses,Submissives,slave and switches.

from time to time here and on other boards i see the question coming from some of 'why is it so hard for the young"? i can understand the question there,we were all young once.

but what i am really wondering in all of this is it's not so much something i have had dificulty with but just as a thought for everyone,how about those who are much older when they discover who and what they really are.i'm sure most answers will be the same but i would like to see others "stories" and thoughts on older people let's say in their mid 30's and up who are looking for the frst time.

i'll say for myself it wasn't easy because i don't like to go and do group functions so my search and info was gained online.my first M/s did not go well but now i have found who and where i belong and it is more than i could have ever hoped for and work on this more every day.and in as such i have grown to care and cherish my Lord and His wofe/my Mistress more and more as we we continue to grow together.


What was hard for me was the transition process-- figuring out how I responded in relationships and why they weren't working, figuring out if I wanted to change my approach or if I wanted to find out where I fit as I was.  When I figured it out I had to figure out if I could walk away from people who wouldn't understand, if I could handle the misconceptions and assumptions made by people who don't really know but think they know.

The hardest part was figuring out how I could be a parent of teenagers and be myself without scandalizing them if they ever learned more then they should.

Once I got off the fence, I found that there were alot of people who felt it completely normal for a woman of 40 who finally figured herself out.  I've not encountered on person who felt that I should know more then I did, in fact most of my communications were with men who were excited of the prospect of introducing me to new experiences.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 7:49:26 AM   
atursvcMaam


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   Did someone say this would be easy?
    Savor the difficulties, it is what makes life interesting and exciting.  it is what helps one to grow and to learn.  Enjoy the ride. 

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live hard, die young and leave a good looking corpse when you die.
Love ya, but, when the zombies start chasing us, i am tripping you.
The glass is always full, the question is, "with what?"

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 7:53:43 AM   
mhawk


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oh beleive me i am. despite the bumps in the road we have,it's worth every moment :D

< Message edited by mhawk -- 2/5/2008 7:54:05 AM >

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 7:57:01 AM   
lateralist1


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Hindsight is a wonderful thing.
I wish I'd known at 18 what I know now.
The major difference now than when I was young is of course the internet.
Just imagine for a moment only being able to get to know people who you met in your vanilla life. And if you happened to live a long way from one another the only way to keep in touch was by snail mail or calls to and from phone boxes.
The freedom of having your own place or your own car was fantastic.
Then of course along came the pill.
I just feel sorry for anyone who didn't grow up in the sixties lol.

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 8:08:56 AM   
toservez


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There is the very true cliché “The older we become the more we know about ourselves and the less we know about everything else”. I am just thirty-two but every year this slaps me in the face more and more as true.

A large part of this life is about overcoming the shackles of societal behavior we are taught. From growing up seeing adult behavior and our own peer group these behaviors are just not normal things to think about let alone explore. I was lucky I stumbled into it and found a home but until that time I never once thought something was missing in my life.

So as we become older year after year become more understanding of whom we are and more importantly for most of us we become more accepting of whom we are. During that journey it becomes easier the farther down to strip the societal expectations and high school behavior of needing to fit in.

So I just think it is natural for most human beings to not look into this way of life until they are older because for most of us we just were not exposed to the possibility or even knew of this world outside of the physical things done for sexual purposes.

In terms of difficulties I do not see much difference because of age. It is just the difficulties themselves change with age.


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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 8:15:39 AM   
mhawk


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toservez,  i wanted to say this to you, your thoughts on "it is just the difficulities themselves that chage with age" is very true. i most certainly agree with you there.

so far the responses i am seeing on this is great,in a way some of this is what i had hoped for in this post. i really do beleive it helps to share with others on things like this. it is one of the many ways we can all learn from eachother.

i look forward to reading more thoughts on this as it progresses and want to say thank you for the posting in so far on this. it is very good to see :D

< Message edited by mhawk -- 2/5/2008 8:16:23 AM >

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 8:37:26 AM   
Dnomyar


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Older people in their mid 30's ???? What about dinasorus in their mid 40's or people older than dirt in their mid 50's. Is there any one alive older than mid 50's here???

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 8:48:17 AM   
mhawk


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of course i am hoping everyone knows i do mean everyone who is older here not just in their 30's, heck considering my Lord is in His 50's and His wife is in Her mid 40's.

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 9:01:06 AM   
Maya2001


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Right now it is also hard for many of those  that are now  in their 60's as  well, I would say the greatest majority of the crowd is in their 40's , for the Dom/mes it has gotten far easier as time went be,  they have established jobs,  so most by then are financially stable and they have built up a supply of toys,  so in a better position to entertained and provide for subs than one in their 20's,  by the time they hit their sixties the often have more time but many subs look at them as being over the hill, because no internet years ago there are far fewer 60 something players,  I am sure in 10 or 15 years from now as the current 40's crowd  moves up in age it will become far easier to find 60 something partners  and the current 20's crowd will then have their time in the lime light. 


Even in vanilla life a male with a high libido is going to go thru transitions on how they are viewed   the teen or 20 something  is just a randy immature stud,   their 40's they would praised for their prowness and by their 60's   they are views as old perverts or dirty old men.

We all go thru age discrimation  in the eyes of others . the sixteen yr old will think he is in hes sexual prime and will think the 40 year is over the hill and think the  60 year is too old for sex,  the 40 year old will view himself as is in his prime an the 20 year old as too young and immature to know what they want and the 60 year old as over the hill,  the 60 years old will has his own view with positives in his favour




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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 9:21:39 AM   
peppermint


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The hardest part was finding that first contact to the community that i felt i needed.  Online you get lots of guys saying that they're Dom, but it's not easy to know if they really are Dom without any experience.   This is probably true for anyone of any age.  I was fortunate to finally make contact with people who could show me the ropes and introduce me to munches. 

I was 53 when i was able to begin my search although i was probably 50 when i discovered all this wonderful kink.  The timing was not right to search any sooner.  I don't regret not discovering all this when i was younger.  I'm a firm believer in events happening when they are meant to happen.  Most likely i just wouldn't have been ready to accept this at a younger age. 

By the way, i met Gary at a week long BDSM camping event.  He is from a couple states away but we hit it off and decided to try the 24/7 thing a couple years ago.  We're having a great time despite the fact that he's older than dirt at 67 and i'm close behind at almost 57. 


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Revise that number. Just got 14 new chicks and 5 turkeys.

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 9:21:57 AM   
Dnomyar


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Maya I am in my 60's Looking at most of the yourger mens post on here saying they have a hard time finding someone I think Im doing very well. I have no problems  with meeting people of any age. I think that attitude has a lot to do with it. Age happens so why worry about it.

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 9:32:53 AM   
PanthersMom


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i was 37 and was going thru a major life changing period in my life, the divorce, a breakdown, health problems and all that had me re-examining my life and who i was.  some things changed, some were reaffirmed, others i'm still exploring.  it's been interesting.  they say life is never easy.  i say if it's lived the way it should be it's never easy because you don't take the path of least resistance, you take the path that is right, no matter what lies ahead.  it can be a hell of a ride.

PM

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 9:34:02 AM   
subtee


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Older people in their mid 30's ???? What about dinasorus in their mid 40's or people older than dirt in their mid 50's. Is there any one alive older than mid 50's here???


And I was already reeling from the "Damaged Goods" thread.

Maybe one way to think about this is not as a certain place on a continuum at which self knowledge was realized, but instead an unfolding of the knowledge, daily, along the continuum:

For self is a sea boundless and measureless.
Say not, "I have found the truth," but rather, "I have found a truth."
Say not, "I have found the path of the soul." Say rather, "I have met the soul walking upon my path."

Kahlil Gibran "The Prophet"

[Edited for punctuation]

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 10:21:37 AM   
Dnomyar


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subtee I still continuum to like you. What does that word mean.

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 10:57:57 AM   
OmegaG


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

subtee I still continuum to like you. What does that word mean.


con·tin·u·um      /kənˈtɪnyuəm/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[kuhn-tin-yoo-uhm] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun, plural -tin·u·a      /-ˈtɪnyuə/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[-tin-yoo-uh] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation.



1.
a continuous extent, series, or whole.



2.
Mathematics.



a.
a set of elements such that between any two of them there is a third element.



b.
the set of all real numbers.



c.
any compact, connected set containing at least two elements.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 10:58:16 AM   
subtee


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This ole damaged-goods bat likes you too...

neither here nor there, all along the way ~smiles~

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Don't believe everything you think...

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 11:00:10 AM   
mnottertail


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I am not assiduously devoted to the alternative to aging, neither.

Grampa Ron

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 11:06:01 AM   
Jeffff


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The older the goat, the stiffer the horn

Billy

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RE: thougts on age - 2/5/2008 11:06:02 AM   
subtee


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~moves her shaking, palsied arms around Ron and gives him a hug and a toothless kiss~

I am an old woman named after my mother
My old man is another child thats grown old
If dreams were lightning thunder was desire
This old house would have burnt down a long time ago


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Don't believe everything you think...

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