Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Humans


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> Humans Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Humans - 1/25/2008 7:39:21 AM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline

The human race never ceases to amaze me.
 
I’m staying in a 3 story hotel.
 
I’m on the second floor.
 
I get in the elevator, a woman gets in beside me, I push one of the buttons, the elevator begins to move in a decidedly “not UPWARDLY movement”.
 
The elevator stops moving, and being the gentleman my Momma taught me to be, I wait until the woman opts to leave the elevator.
 
She doesn’t move.  I look at her as if to say “you first”.
 
She says (I ain’t making this up)…”oh…is this 1?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 10:20:32 AM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold
 
The elevator stops moving, and being the gentleman my Momma taught me to be,


I'm sorry... did you say something after that?  I couldn't read any further... brain just stopped.

Cali
(still waiting on the arrival of Gris' credit card for the shopping trip he said she could have... cuz he's so gentlemanly)


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 11:02:26 AM   
batshalom


Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline
Maybe it's opposite day. Ever thinka that?

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 12:46:27 PM   
PanthersMom


Posts: 2215
Joined: 11/26/2007
From: Cleveland Ohio
Status: offline
"i left my brainnnn.....on the second floor"
(sung to the tune of "i left my heart in san francisco")

PM

_____________________________

That which does not kill me, better run pretty damn fast

I miss my ex, but my aim is improving!




(in reply to batshalom)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 6:04:24 PM   
Marc2b


Posts: 6660
Joined: 8/7/2006
Status: offline
Cut the woman a little slack would ya? Maybe she’s got she’s got something on her mind (e.g. family problems) that has her distracted. We all have our dumbass moments, it’s what makes us so lovably human.

_____________________________

Do you know what the most awesome thing about being an Atheist is? You're not required to hate anybody!

(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 6:07:28 PM   
ThinkingKitten


Posts: 447
Joined: 6/15/2006
From: Ontari-ari-o
Status: offline
And what if there are a couple of underground parking levels below you huh? Or a basement?
 
Nope. I'm not blonde.
 
Hey - maybe she liked the look of you and it was an attempt to strike up a conversation, and being blown away by your handsome good looks and air of devastating charm, she blew it with the first stupid thing that entered her head. Did you ever consider that?

_____________________________

Thinking Kitten

If you can't stand the heat... tell the chef to get out of the kitchen.

(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 6:18:45 PM   
CuriousLord


Posts: 3911
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline
Man, I've walked to the wrong building about two times today when between destinations.  And that isn't very unusual for me.  Oh, and I had to return to my room about three times in a row (within about fives minutes) this morning after I woke up, constantly forgetting little things I needed.

Oh, and if you asked me, I couldn't tell you all of the classes I'm taking this semester off the top of my head.

PS-  I've had the same roommate since the start of last semester.  I don't know his name.  (Yes, the first name.  But I also don't know any of his other names.)

< Message edited by CuriousLord -- 1/25/2008 6:29:59 PM >

(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 6:23:34 PM   
christine1


Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

Man, I've walked to the wrong building about two times today when between destinations.  And that isn't very unusual for me.  Oh, and I had to return to my room about three times in a row (within about fives minutes) this morning after I woke up, constantly forgetting little things I needed.

Oh, and if you asked me, I couldn't tell you all of the classes I'm taking this semester off the top of my head.

PS-  I've had the same roommate since the start of last semester.  I don't know his name.  (Yes, the first name.  But I also don't know any of his other names.)


geesh!  and some people think i'm a dumb blonde!  (that is meant in  the most fun way of jesting CuriousLord.)

_____________________________

i am woman! er, godzilla! hear me roar!

http://wavcentral.com/cgi-bin/log/log.cgi?id=2856&sound=/sounds/movies/godzilla/roar.mp3


He's the "boom" overwhelming...

He is my Master, my lover, my best friend my everything.

(in reply to CuriousLord)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 6:31:28 PM   
CuriousLord


Posts: 3911
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline
Yeah.. I wonder a lot if I'm clogging my memory with too much other stuff, or if it's all the sleep deprivation, or if my memory is actually just that bad.

(in reply to christine1)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 10:30:18 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ThinkingKitten

And what if there are a couple of underground parking levels below you huh? Or a basement?
 
Nope. I'm not blonde.
 
Hey - maybe she liked the look of you and it was an attempt to strike up a conversation, and being blown away by your handsome good looks and air of devastating charm, she blew it with the first stupid thing that entered her head. Did you ever consider that?


No garage...no basement...however, your second point is valid.

That must be what happened.

(in reply to ThinkingKitten)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Humans - 1/25/2008 10:34:48 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Marc2b

Cut the woman a little slack would ya? Maybe she’s got she’s got something on her mind (e.g. family problems) that has her distracted. We all have our dumbass moments, it’s what makes us so lovably human.


Indeed we do.

Reminds me of a flight I had from Seattle to San Diego a few years back (for those of you not familiar with the cities on the West Coast....that's a straight line flight, right down the coast....about the same as flying from NYC to Orlando).

We landed, and the girl next to me looked at me (she lived in Seattle) with a completely straight face and asked me..."do you happen to know the time difference here?"
 
(I told her we lost 3 weeks on this flight).

(in reply to Marc2b)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Humans - 1/26/2008 1:49:22 AM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
Not long back I spent round twenty minutes wandering the streets of Manchester looking for... the nearest London Underground station.

_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Humans - 1/26/2008 2:00:30 AM   
seeksfemslave


Posts: 4011
Joined: 6/16/2006
Status: offline
In a 3 storey building you shouldn't have been using the lift (elevator) anyway.
Excercise and good health and all that.

You never said anything about luggage so dont fib. and mention it now!

(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Humans - 1/26/2008 5:38:33 AM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: seeksfemslave

In a 3 storey building you shouldn't have been using the lift (elevator) anyway.
Excercise and good health and all that.

You never said anything about luggage so dont fib. and mention it now!


But...but....but....I was carrying valuable crystal !!!!!

(in reply to seeksfemslave)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Humans - 1/26/2008 4:36:42 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
Sshhhhhhhhhhh stop telling people my secret alternate name... "Crystal".

Cali Swavroski


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Humans - 1/26/2008 5:24:11 PM   
thompsonx


Posts: 23322
Joined: 10/1/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold

Reminds me of a flight I had from Seattle to San Diego a few years back (for those of you not familiar with the cities on the West Coast....that's a straight line flight, right down the coast....about the same as flying from NYC to Orlando).

We landed, and the girl next to me looked at me (she lived in Seattle) with a completely straight face and asked me..."do you happen to know the time difference here?"
 
(I told her we lost 3 weeks on this flight).

Griswold:
San Diego is more than 300 miles east of Seattle.  Had you flown that distance directly east from Seattle you would be in Montana and the Mountain time zone.
thompson





(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Humans - 1/26/2008 6:14:33 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: thompsonx

quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold

Reminds me of a flight I had from Seattle to San Diego a few years back (for those of you not familiar with the cities on the West Coast....that's a straight line flight, right down the coast....about the same as flying from NYC to Orlando).

We landed, and the girl next to me looked at me (she lived in Seattle) with a completely straight face and asked me..."do you happen to know the time difference here?"
 
(I told her we lost 3 weeks on this flight).

Griswold:
San Diego is more than 300 miles east of Seattle.  Had you flown that distance directly east from Seattle you would be in Montana and the Mountain time zone.
thompson


GEEEEEEEEEEEEEZUZ!!!!!!!

(I just checked this out...because I knew it just COULDN'T be right!!!!  And it is!!!!)

I will spend the rest of my life finding this woman and apologize to her!

(in reply to thompsonx)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Humans - 1/26/2008 7:16:59 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
OMG Seriously.  If she didn't know that ALL of California is in the same time zone as she lived in, do you SERIOUSLY think that she knew that San Diego was 300 miles east of Seattle???

Cali Magellan


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Humans - 1/26/2008 8:22:15 PM   
DesertRat


Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord
...I've had the same roommate since the start of last semester.  I don't know his name... 


Dude...your roommate's name is "dude". But then, I can't remember my last girlfriend's name. It was either 'sweetheart' or 'baby'.

Bob (Desertwhatever) 

_____________________________

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro--Hunter S. Thompson
It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide!--Chief Dead St. Knockout, 1933, Liverpool
Damn the crops. I'll only find peace at the end of a rope.--Winston Van Loo, 1911

(in reply to CuriousLord)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Humans - 1/26/2008 8:27:37 PM   
CuriousLord


Posts: 3911
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesertRat

Dude...your roommate's name is "dude". But then, I can't remember my last girlfriend's name. It was either 'sweetheart' or 'baby'.


That's the beautiful thing about girlfriends; they're all named "baby".  :P

(in reply to DesertRat)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> Humans Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094