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Sending pictures? - 1/22/2008 8:26:10 PM   
shysub0951


Posts: 132
Joined: 1/22/2008
Status: offline 		i am wondering if it is inappropiate or rude to tell someone that you are not comfortable sending them your pictures, i'm talking about being fully clothed with no nudity. There have been some rude messages sent back to me when i tell them that i will not send any pictures of myself. Is this common in the lifestyle? And no i have not talked to them since.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Sending pictures? - 1/22/2008 8:30:00 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: shysub0951

i am wondering if it is inappropiate or rude to tell someone that you are not comfortable sending them your pictures, i'm talking about being fully clothed with no nudity. There have been some rude messages sent back to me when i tell them that i will not send any pictures of myself. Is this common in the lifestyle? And no i have not talked to them since.


Not at all, shy..it's perfectly acceptable to refuse to send pics.  Decent folks will understand when you tell them you're not comfy sending pics, and the ones that get rude and insist on it are generally just looking for wanking material...

Don't let anyone pressure you.  If you're not comfortable with it, it'syour choice :)

(in reply to shysub0951)
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RE: Sending pictures? - 1/22/2008 8:33:33 PM   
LadyLynx


Posts: 1098
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline 		you do what is comfortable for you. just because your a sub, doesn't mean that you cannot stand up for yourself.  Now me, I prefer having a pic before I meet someone. if for no other reason then so I can pick them out of the crowd.   There are plenty of people within the lifestyle who choose not have pics in their profile, and to be extremely careful about whom they send their pic too.  And alot of reasons. Like fear of being outed at work/family. fear of losing custody of their children. and a hundred other reasons. but like I said before, You need to do what is comfortable for YOU. Period! Welcome to CM and the message boards

_____________________________

Our community maybe openminded as a whole, but it is still made up of individuals who bring in their own opinions,baggage and agendas!

Known as SwitchWitch in my local community,and on IRC Bondage.

I also go by the nic SwitchWitch on MDS.

(in reply to shysub0951)
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RE: Sending pictures? - 1/22/2008 8:33:34 PM   
Owned1


Posts: 847
Joined: 7/6/2005
From: Toronto, Ontario
Status: offline 		If someone is pressuring you to do something especially in the beginning phases of getting to know someone that is the clue to tell them to take a walk.

There are many many many wannabe/wanker/idiots online.  They have found this is a great place to pretend to be something they are not.

The rule of thumb especially online is ----if it does not feel right it is not right!!!

Truly if you want to explore this lifestyle find a local group and wander out to the real world.  You can still find idiots however you will also find real people who will be able to guide and assist you.

Feel free to email me anytime if you have any questions.

owned

_____________________________

~~in His Chains i am free~~

(in reply to shysub0951)
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RE: Sending pictures? - 1/22/2008 8:34:40 PM   
MissMagnolia


Posts: 3636
Status: offline 		It depends. If you have been talking to someone and think there may be a connection, you can't really wonder at their asking to see a photo of yourself. Eventually, I assume you would be meeting them, so why would you not send a pic?

You don't HAVE to do it, but I think most would forget about it if you couldn't provide some proof of who you are or show that you are attractive to them.

I understand people not putting pics in profile, because of work, etc., but not in a private email. I would want to know who I was talking to.



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(in reply to GreedyTop)
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RE: Sending pictures? - 1/22/2008 8:36:32 PM   
DomMeinCT


Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: shysub0951

There have been some rude messages sent back to me when i tell them that i will not send any pictures of myself. Is this common in the lifestyle?


You can find rude and polite everywhere.

You get to choose what you share of  yourself with others.

Would you want to meet someone who responded back to you with a rude message?  I'd consider it a warning sign for short temper and bullying, immature demeanor. Consider yourself lucky - you saved yourself time passing on a loser.

(in reply to shysub0951)
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RE: Sending pictures? - 1/22/2008 8:47:49 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		For me, if there's an outright refusal to send a picture after we've talked a bit and are looking to meet, I begin to wonder why. I'm not going to meet ANYONE, even in public, without a picture first. But, I don't have to have one right up front, nor do I have to have one until we've chatted for a while.

Master Fire


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The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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Ms Relationship Books
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(in reply to shysub0951)
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RE: Sending pictures? - 1/22/2008 8:54:41 PM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Good greif,  if you don't want to send any pictures then just say no and who gives a damn what anyone has to say about it.



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Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



(in reply to shysub0951)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Sending pictures? - 1/23/2008 3:25:09 PM   
shysub0951


Posts: 132
Joined: 1/22/2008
Status: offline 		i will send a pic to someone if i have a connection with and will meet in public, but if i don't have a connection or even want to meet them in public then i won't send a pic and that's usually what gets people irritated with me.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
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RE: Sending pictures? - 1/23/2008 3:29:12 PM   
CuriousLord


Posts: 3911
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: shysub0951

i am wondering if it is inappropiate or rude to tell someone that you are not comfortable sending them your pictures, i'm talking about being fully clothed with no nudity. There have been some rude messages sent back to me when i tell them that i will not send any pictures of myself. Is this common in the lifestyle? And no i have not talked to them since.


It should be whatever you're comfy with.

Okay, so if you're in an ongoing relationship, you may have some level of commitment to satisfy.  To random people, though?  Naw.

(in reply to shysub0951)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Sending pictures? - 1/23/2008 3:38:29 PM   
FatDomDaddy


Posts: 3183
Joined: 1/31/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMagnolia

It depends. If you have been talking to someone and think there may be a connection, you can't really wonder at their asking to see a photo of yourself. Eventually, I assume you would be meeting them, so why would you not send a pic?

You don't HAVE to do it, but I think most would forget about it if you couldn't provide some proof of who you are or show that you are attractive to them.

I understand people not putting pics in profile, because of work, etc., but not in a private email. I would want to know who I was talking to.


I whole heartily agree.

There are many on the Internet who will string someone along, all the time lying or lying by omission about their physical appearance. Some believe that a magic pill might pop up and save them, others figure that if they can make a great connection, or otherwise prove their value, that the person they are talking to will  eschew their own physical standards or desires and looks will not matter. 
Maybe so, but probably not.  The same is true of people who send outdated photographs.  A simple picture even at a distance to give the other person some idea who they are talking to, especially after a few conversations is probably a good idea.

(in reply to MissMagnolia)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Sending pictures? - 1/23/2008 3:45:58 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline 		It's like this; people who are rude to you, when you are acting within your own concepts of comfort and safety, aren't likely going to be people you're going to want to be involved with.

Are they rude?  No, they just have expectations that aren't compatible with yours.  They certainly might be rude people, but I don't think that's the reason why in this case.

Stephan


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"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to CuriousLord)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Sending pictures? - 1/23/2008 3:48:57 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		rude people are aholes that deserve nothing.  waste of time to deal with.  you should be happy not to send them anything.

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I am flawed.
Imperfect.
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SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

(in reply to Stephann)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Sending pictures? - 1/23/2008 4:06:17 PM   
soul2share


Posts: 7084
Joined: 12/18/2007
From: somewhere out there.....
Status: offline 		Well, the ONE time I sent a pic, clothed, just a head shot, I was suddenly told that I "wasn't what he was looking for"...go figure...and I did warn him that I take horrific pics!  I don't know.....I don't ask for pics, mainly because I don't have any good ones.....as for recognizing someone when meeting, I've never had any problems locating anyone just by a clothing and vehicle description.

When it comes to sending pics, follow your guts.....if you're not comfortable doing it, and the other person is being a dick about it, well, then, it's time to move on......no one has any rights to make demands on you until you are in an established relationship! 

Just my .05.

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I have to stop saying "How stupid can you be?"...people are starting to take it as a challenge!

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(in reply to faerytattoodgirl)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Sending pictures? - 1/23/2008 4:09:30 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: soul2share


Just my .05.


eh what happened to .02???  inflation i guess


_____________________________

I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

(in reply to soul2share)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Sending pictures? - 1/23/2008 4:13:26 PM   
soul2share


Posts: 7084
Joined: 12/18/2007
From: somewhere out there.....
Status: offline 		hey...between inflation and taxes, .02 just doesn't go as far as it used to! 

_____________________________

I have to stop saying "How stupid can you be?"...people are starting to take it as a challenge!

*Not a fuck was given.*

(in reply to faerytattoodgirl)
Profile   Post #: 16
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