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How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/22/2008 8:20:21 PM   
OnyxDelphi


Posts: 138
Joined: 5/30/2007
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So heres the situation down and dirty like.

I have this really hot friend who is at a point in her life in which she's not ready to date anybody. Yet...she still craves physical touch. So, out of a miracle given by God himself, she became my makeout (fuck) buddy.

Yet, although I'm smart enough not to tell her. I really want her to fall under my spell. I'm not dorky, I'm very smart, and I'm very suave. However...I scared of fucking things up.

So how do I get her to grow deeper feelings for me?
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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/22/2008 9:14:38 PM   
NaiveTempest


Posts: 345
Joined: 11/20/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline 		Hell, that's a tough one. You just have to feel her out on it. Different things work for different people so there is not right way to go about it. Sometimes you've just gotta take a chance. Do you think that she might like you enough to give a relationship a shot? What type of vibe do you get from her?

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"All the things I should have said that I never said/All the things we should have done that we never did/All the things I should have given, but I didn't.../Give me these moments back..."

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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/22/2008 9:21:48 PM   
OnyxDelphi


Posts: 138
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline 		not really sure.

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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/22/2008 9:32:32 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		You don't.  Bonnie Raitt sang it best, "I can't make you love me if you don't, I can't make your heart feel something it won't."

Cali


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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/22/2008 9:35:33 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		My take on this situation is that she needs to feel in control.
Let her set the pace and intimacy levels.
If you push or crush too hard, she will run away.
 
IMO,
 
Vendaval

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"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
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http://KinkMeet.co.uk

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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/22/2008 11:06:56 PM   
OnyxDelphi


Posts: 138
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline 		Yeah...that makes sense.

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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 8:18:39 AM   
samboct


Posts: 1817
Joined: 1/17/2007
Status: offline 		A slightly different take-

There's a reason that they call it "making love"- its an apt description.  Don't try to manipulate her (the Bonnie Raitt reference is appropos), focus on pleasing her both in and out of the bedroom.  Time will tell if the relationship will be successful.  From your standpoint- there's often way too much emphasis on what you asked about- how do I make her reciprocate my feelings?  In cases where the relationship doesn't work-the thought of that if you just played your cards better, she would have fallen for you is a terrible mistake.  There's nothing to play- and by attempting to manipulate you create a self fulfilling prophecy.  Your goal since you recognize that she is unwilling to commit to you at this point to the same level as you have to her is to make her comfortable in this decision.  Do NOT tell her of your undying love, if she's made it clear that such a statement isn't going to be recieved well.  A simple declarative of - "I really like hanging out with you." will be accurate and respectful.  If the sex continues to improve (and if you both really like each other- it will)- odds are in 6 months she'll be a bit more receptive to the idea of a serious romance.


Dr. Sam

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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 8:27:30 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

So how do I get her to grow deeper feelings for me?


You can't make her grow deeper feelings for you.
What you can do is adopt a wait-and-see attitude and allow things to develop.  It may happen, it may not, you may have other surprises. 


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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 8:36:28 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Make yourself unavailable.
People always want what they can't have.
 
the.dark.
(.withatouchofsarcasm.)

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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 10:06:54 AM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OnyxDelphi

So how do I get her to grow deeper feelings for me?


diamond jewelery, new cars, new house, and cash is always good.


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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 10:39:34 AM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Feel her out- see where her head is- delecately and non-threateningly.

Say sheld make a good partner in AND out of bed.

just maybe she has the same feelings for you.

does she look at other guys?   was she hurt by a love?  is she ready for a bf? 

it is a careful walk- if you trip you lose your bed buddy- i know i did myself. i expressed things that- he wasnt wanting to deal with. not between us- but my life at the time. it became to much for him to worry if my problems would wash up on him. so he put some space. i rang him up a month back- only to tell him i was fine and the problems blew over.

in our case we soon denoted this was a passing thing- at some point it would gracefully be the past. thats what happened.  mostly cos we had good communication.

notice what her buttons are. often the person hot in bed is the last one the works to hang out with....

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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 12:14:42 PM   
OnyxDelphi


Posts: 138
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

Make yourself unavailable.
People always want what they can't have.
 
the.dark.
(.withatouchofsarcasm.)

 
 
I read this somewhere else as well.

(in reply to RCdc)
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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 12:24:12 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		The only problem is after they catch you, the thrill is gone and they are after someone else.  You just have to be careful how you play that game.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 12:39:18 PM   
urtoy


Posts: 55
Joined: 4/23/2004
Status: offline 		Respectfully, I disagree with the "wanting what you don't have" theory. It seems that guys cherish "the thrill of the hunt" and want to persue the elusive, but us female types prefer a sure thing. While you can't force her to reciprocate your feelings, you can be patient and give her plenty of opportunities to see what a great guy you are. Only you know her interests. Be creative.T take her to a timy little ethnic restaurant that is short on frills but has wonderful food. Rent some roller skates or a bicycle built for two and enjoy a day outside (especially nice if you pack a fancy picnic lunch). Rent the new movie she's been dying to see and offer to come over to cook dinner and watch it together (be a sport and do the dishes). If she's healing from her last relationship, be the shoulder she can cry on. Listen to her, learn about her, let her know that you can be counted on. Even if she never reciprocates your feelings, the deepened friendship can only be a treasure to both of you as years go by. And don't focus so much on what you want (or think you want) that you fail to cherish what you do have with her.

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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 12:44:13 PM   
tigerstyle


Posts: 168
Joined: 5/25/2005
Status: offline 		Your suavity is of no use here. She has the "hand".

No matter how slick we are, there is always someone with "the hand" over us.

(in reply to urtoy)
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RE: How to get her to like me. Rofl. - 1/23/2008 12:45:51 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Being that you are a young 20 years old- Ild say to go for it. If you are wrong you have a lot of good years ahead- if you are right then everyone wins.

Have you tried flowers?

What makes this lady special?



I ruined a handful of "could have beens" simply because I ignored the cues.

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