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question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 1:47:14 PM   
lovetokissnylons


Posts: 117
Joined: 10/17/2006
Status: offline 		Sorry if this has been covered already, but I haven't found it.

For the new CollarMe.com "Circle of Friends" button:  is it necessary or desirable to ask someone (via a private message, etc.) first before adding them to your own Circle of Friends ?  

I'd like to hear responses from anybody who wants to respond, but especially hope to hear from people who've been added without first being asked, and whether they resent that or not.  Thank you. 
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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 1:51:22 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Resentment is a wasteful emotion.
If someone has asked us then we simply and politely decline unless we have met or speak to the person other than on the CM board.  Those that have asked us that we have met and who are our friends, we add because they are friends.  If one were to ask someone if who is owned - then asking  if their Master or Mistress allows it is just politeness from our POV.
 
the.dark.


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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 1:53:00 PM   
marieToo


Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline 		Ewwww.  You mean people can just add other people as friends without them knowing it? 

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(in reply to lovetokissnylons)
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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 1:57:44 PM   
LadyHathor


Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline 		Let's say it irritates Me, for as the.dark says, I want to be associated with people I know, chat with outside the boards and am aligned with in philosophy--I don't want to be a number, or associated to make someone look good.

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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 2:04:09 PM   
MissHarlet


Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
Status: offline 		My understanding is that you cant be added unless you agree to be added.  I personally agree with Dark and Darcy ... I dont agree to add anyone or be added to anyones list that I dont know personally or wish that I knew personally because I have known them online for a number of years and know that I share philosophies or at least that I consider them to be persons of integrity

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To be respected you must be respectful, to be loved you must be willing to love,
to be trusted you must be willing to trust.

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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 2:05:02 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I don't think a person can be added without the request being either accepted or denied. 

I'm with the others.  If it isn't someone that I speak with away from the forums, the request gets blown off pretty quickly.  The people that I do call friends are worth more than just someone who happened to like My picture.  Guess I just have a more stringent definition of 'friend' than some do.

BTW, anybody else think this is kind of a MySpace rip off?


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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 2:09:01 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		You can not be added unless you accept the invitation to be added.

I'll accept invitations from those whose company I enjoy, whether online or offline.

I wouldn't call it a "rip off" of MySpace anymore than LiveJournal, Yahoo360, or other types of blog spaces are.  I've accepted a few invitations, but I don't use it for anything as of yet.  I haven't really looked into it.

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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 2:12:02 PM   
Littlepita


Posts: 1430
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline 		I was just wondering about this very thing a minute ago because in the last three days I have had three request to add myself to someones friend list. I haven't spoken to any of these people before and I was unsure how to handle it. I would rather just ignore than to deny. Is that OK?

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(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 2:13:20 PM   
Gwynvyd


Posts: 4949
Status: offline 		Personaly I add folks to my friends list if I talk to them alot in here, or if I email them on the otherside.. none of you lovely people live any where near me. *sighs* But one. They do need to have a decent head on thier shoulders.. and I have to really like thier logic, and way of seeing things to add them. as for friends request well likewise.

I would think it sort of rude to ask me to be in your friends list if we werent well.. friends who constantly bantered about on the boards or in mail at a minimum. I have however found new and interesting people by looking at my friends friends... and I guess it is useful in that way.

Gwyn

< Message edited by Gwynvyd -- 1/19/2008 2:14:07 PM >

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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 2:19:04 PM   
Gwynvyd


Posts: 4949
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

You can not be added unless you accept the invitation to be added.

I'll accept invitations from those whose company I enjoy, whether online or offline.

I wouldn't call it a "rip off" of MySpace anymore than LiveJournal, Yahoo360, or other types of blog spaces are.  I've accepted a few invitations, but I don't use it for anything as of yet.  I haven't really looked into it.


I guess some people are more formal about it then others... *shrugs* and that is damn hard to determine beforehand if you ask me.. LOL

To me any one who is on the message boards as a regular.. and ya'll know who you are who post lots who like me as a buddy or a friend, spam my box away.. I like having friends.. It wont bug me a bit.

I can't limit mine to who I have met in person because that would be like maybe 4 people.. and ya know what.. most of em are already on my friends list. LOL More of you need to move to Florida dern it.

*smiles*

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 2:20:54 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

I would rather just ignore than to deny. Is that OK?


I hope so.  That is how I respond to it.


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(in reply to Littlepita)
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RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 2:26:13 PM   
shellzbythesea


Posts: 120
Joined: 5/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Littlepita

I was just wondering about this very thing a minute ago because in the last three days I have had three request to add myself to someones friend list. I haven't spoken to any of these people before and I was unsure how to handle it. I would rather just ignore than to deny. Is that OK?


That's how i've chosen to handle it, myself.  i'd rather "ignore" the request then leave them feeling "rejected."  i've had three requests, as well.  Only one is a person that i have spent anytime getting to know.  Because i admire that person, their request was immediately accepted.  Another has sent me an email or two but we really don't know anything about each other so i chose to ignore.   The last one completely confounds me.  i don't recall him ever so much as having *viewed* my ad and he's for certain never said as much as one word to me...yet he wants to add me as a friend?  Again, rather than "reject" him, i simply chose to ignore him.  When i pulled up his ad, it appeared to me that he's simply trying to add as many "friends" as humanly possible.
 
i did add a journal entry about not wanting to be added or asked by anyone unless we have already established some sort of "connection".  Yet it felt like other's then assumed i'm not open to friendships...and i am...so i removed that entry. 
 
i simply prefer to actually build a friendship *before* adding someone as a "friend."  It's sort of the cart before the horse for some, i think.

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 2:59:21 PM   
MissHarlet


Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
Status: offline 		Im not really concerned about someone feeling rejected that has sent me a request to be on their circle of friends ... that I have never spoken to ... never emailed with... and that has never even viewed my profile.  It is quite easy for me to quickly hit the reject button and be done with it.
Im not a notch/ number on anyones list ... or flogger handle <EG>

_____________________________

Protectress of hearts/souls of all submissives calling Bounty's Place home, by order of Bounty~Proprietor

To be respected you must be respectful, to be loved you must be willing to love,
to be trusted you must be willing to trust.

(in reply to shellzbythesea)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 3:02:15 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		We would find it kind of rude to not respond, but that's just us.  We simply let a person know the reason why, rather than leave someone guessing.  That way they know where and how they stand.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 3:44:21 PM   
softpjOS


Posts: 398
Joined: 6/7/2005
Status: offline 		I wonder...

now that they have made a "friends" list, will they change the "admirers" list to something along the lines of  "Stalkers"?  Seeing how you can't accept/deny/delete/hide/run from those that "admire" you so much as to have never contacted/met/spoken to yet lurk there like a well ummm stalker. 

(in reply to lovetokissnylons)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 4:05:28 PM   
heartcream


Posts: 3044
Joined: 5/9/2007
From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
Status: offline 		The new Friends thing is something I dont feel a call toward. I have had CM friends ask me to join in. I wrote back and said I didnt really want to get involved with it.

If someone I dont know contacts me, I go by how I feel, whether, and how I respond to them.

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Profile   Post #: 16
RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 4:32:36 PM   
Fnordstrum


Posts: 164
Joined: 2/14/2006
Status: offline 		I don't know why anyone would want to add someone as a "friend," on here or any other site, if it wasn't someone they knew/had talked to at least a few times...

But, fnord.

¤¤¤¤¤¤¤

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Power = Work / Time
Knowledge is Power and Time is Money, so
Knowledge = Work / Money, and Money = Work / Knowledge
Therefore, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity (regardless of work done), and vice versa.

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Profile   Post #: 17
RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 4:36:56 PM   
Rianne


Posts: 49
Joined: 11/30/2007
Status: offline 		I've played with it, but don't understand it.  I've think I've clicked on it to be able to find people whos posts I like to read....makes it easier.  A couple people have "subscribed" to my journal.  I have no clue what that means.

(in reply to Fnordstrum)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 5:54:16 PM   
Ebonybbw


Posts: 114
Joined: 12/2/2007
Status: offline 		I have been requested to be added and took advantage of the opportunity and added the person.  Most I have no idea who they are.  Maybe emailed once or twice.  I think it is nice that someone would want to be my friend or see me in their circle of friend.   Everyone can add me if you like.. hehe  More friends the better or is that the merrier.   

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Mistress Ebony
Miami's Newest Supersized Domme
http://yourebonybbw.googlepages.com/mistressebony

(in reply to lovetokissnylons)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: question about Circle of Friends - 1/19/2008 6:57:44 PM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline 		I haven't exactly figured out what the purpose of the "friends" things is.  If it makes it easier to send a quick note, or check message board posts, then that would be a good thing, I guess.
I have only accepted 2, (one is My boy, and the other is a Domina a interact with often and outside of this site) and haven't requested any as yet.  Until I figure out the usefulness, I probably won't.  And I have had a bunch of requests to get added.  From people I do not know.  I do simply ignore those, rather than decline and then feel I also need to write a note explaining why.  It just means more email replies to something on My part, when all they did was click a button.  (Is that how it's done?)  So I hope just ignoring it, kind of like chat requests, just makes it go away after a time.   
One boy did actually request, in an email, if he could add Me and I did respond with My feelings on it, i.e., that I did not know him, but I did suggest if he wanted quick access to My profile to write, I would be more than happy to have him add Me as a favorite which would land him on My Admirer's list.  I don't pay attention to that anyway, so...no harm, no foul!. 
Frankly, I would rather be able to mouse over a name here on the boards and get the salient facts of a poster (gender, orientation, location , age), rather than have to click and view the full profile.  That's a feature I could really get behind!  What say you, Mods?  Is that a possible feature we could look forward to in the future?

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom


(in reply to lovetokissnylons)
Profile   Post #: 20
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