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Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 3:13:24 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

This is not a life altering problem. But lately he's had more free time and has started playing the same online games that I do. And a game I have played semi-regularly over a period of years is now something that he plays for two hours and has far outpassed my best score.

And I'm having trouble accepting that. Now I do know that since he's an engineer by training, he is better spatially speaking than I am. But understanding that intellectually and accepting it viscerally are two different things.

Suddenly having him beat my score is taking away my pleasure from the game. So how do I handle this?

See I said it wasn't a life altering problem. Just a small bit of ego deflation going on.

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Post #: 1

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 3:18:40 PM

hisannabelle

Posts: 1992
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Tallahassee, FL, USA
Status: offline

greetings celeste,

go beat someone else. or play a different game, if there's a similar game you can play. or - better yet - get him to play with you and help you get better at it. then turn around and stab him in the back and beat his high score (just kidding. sort of :P).

he and i are very competitive when we play cards and stuff together so i kind of get where you are coming from, hehe. i hope you manage to get over the ego deflation (just remind yourself of how brilliant you are. or get him to remind you!).

respectfully,
annabelle.

_____________________________

a'ishah (the artist formerly known as annabelle)
i have the kind of beauty that moves...

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 2

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 4:08:20 PM

Griswold

Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

This is not a life altering problem. But lately he's had more free time and has started playing the same online games that I do. And a game I have played semi-regularly over a period of years is now something that he plays for two hours and has far outpassed my best score.

And I'm having trouble accepting that. Now I do know that since he's an engineer by training, he is better spatially speaking than I am. But understanding that intellectually and accepting it viscerally are two different things.

Suddenly having him beat my score is taking away my pleasure from the game. So how do I handle this?

See I said it wasn't a life altering problem. Just a small bit of ego deflation going on.

He's an engineer. A numbers guy.

Guarenteed, he can tell you EXACTLY what kind of gas mileage he gets in his car.

Here's how you play this:

First three weeks...you sneak out at whatever time of the morning you need to and you start putting a gallon of gas in his car once a week, every 3 days...whatever it takes for him to come home and tell you "Honey...I don't know what it is...but I'm getting 3 kabillion miles per gallon on my 2003 Hupmobile".

Congratulate him, tell him how you've always been impressed with the way he drives and "I'm not surprised you get better gas mileage than me"....Mister Big Stuff has been established.

Next two weeks....siphon out a gallon every 3 days.

It's your game...you make the rules...and you win every time you play :)

(Glad I could help).

If the above doesn't do the trick....teach the cat to shit in his shoes.

< Message edited by Griswold -- 1/7/2008 4:14:05 PM >

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 3

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 4:19:52 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

You could always play more and practice more than he does.

I know the feeling. It frustrates me that Valyraen is consistently better at first person shooters than I am. Which is why I take a certain delight that, for whatever reason, I am excelling in our latest MMO and am 11 levels ahead of him.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 1/7/2008 4:20:36 PM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 4

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 4:20:19 PM

slavetaboo

Posts: 408
Joined: 11/30/2007
Status: offline

As a hardcore girl gamer, I used to manage a website strictly for girl gamers in order to provide tips, tricks, or simply an edge so that female players could keep up to speed with what the male gamers are doing. If you feel truly competitive and want to be better at this particular game then pick his brain. Find out what he's doing so that you can improve. One of the most important things to remember when playing online games is that they aren't perfect. Explore, try new things, try things that may or may not be possible and if it doesn't work the first time...try it again.

If you've been playing for years and he is instantly better than you then perhaps you might excel in a different game genre....just my two cents.

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 5

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 4:33:32 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

I'd say try to distance yourself and see how funny the situation is. Go ahead and make a competition game out of it if you really can keep it fun and enjoyable.

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"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to slavetaboo)

Post #: 6

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 5:08:35 PM

batshalom

Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

Mmmmmmmmmmm. Pretend it's some kind of bondage. He's Dominating you at your own game.

I'm buzzin' on wine so I might just be in a particularly ... eh ... submissively carnal mood ... but the thought is simply nipply to me.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 7

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 5:26:41 PM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

compete :)

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Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 8

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 5:35:31 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Suddenly having him beat my score is taking away my pleasure from the game. So how do I handle this?

Grow up.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 9

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 6:00:26 PM

Elorin

Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
Suddenly having him beat my score is taking away my pleasure from the game. So how do I handle this?

I don't know how to handle it, but I know that we bought an Xbox 360 game as a way to "do stuff together" and he stayed up until 3 AM every night for the first two weeks we had it perfecting his game. While I played for 45 minutes perhaps, 3 or 4 times a day. And it's just not fun to play with him because instead of it being something we do together, he has this goal to go out and defeat the game instead of enjoying it with me.

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'cause when i look down /i just miss all the good stuff / when i look up / i just trip over things

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 10

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 6:22:12 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Elorin

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
Suddenly having him beat my score is taking away my pleasure from the game. So how do I handle this?

I don't know how to handle it, but I know that we bought an Xbox 360 game as a way to "do stuff together" and he stayed up until 3 AM every night for the first two weeks we had it perfecting his game. While I played for 45 minutes perhaps, 3 or 4 times a day. And it's just not fun to play with him because instead of it being something we do together, he has this goal to go out and defeat the game instead of enjoying it with me.

Have you tried games that require co-op mode? I have one (though it's a kids game it's fun) where you control four characters no matter what and to make it through each area you have to use the special skills of each character. While you can play it alone and switch around between them, it's much easier and more fun to have another person handling two while you handle two.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Elorin)

Post #: 11

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 7:54:06 PM

Arrrchibald

Posts: 350
Joined: 1/3/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
And I'm having trouble accepting that. Now I do know that since he's an engineer by training, he is better spatially speaking than I am. But understanding that intellectually and accepting it viscerally are two different things.

Understandable. This is what a lot of psychologists would refer to as: OMFG u got pwn3d by a n00b!!!11

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 12

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 8:54:37 PM

Elorin

Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub
Have you tried games that require co-op mode? I have one (though it's a kids game it's fun) where you control four characters no matter what and to make it through each area you have to use the special skills of each character. While you can play it alone and switch around between them, it's much easier and more fun to have another person handling two while you handle two.

We went from Guitar Hero three...which he mastered handily while I slaved away at the easy level...to Rock Band, which he defeated similarly, again making the game no fun for me.

Most recently I was gifted a game for Christmas that he refuses to play unless I'm playing also, which I enjoy a lot more with him even though he's better at it than I am. (Dance Dance Revolution...all these damned music games and me with no freaking rhythm.)

_____________________________

'cause when i look down /i just miss all the good stuff / when i look up / i just trip over things

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 13

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 9:05:04 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

You could always try playing MMORPGs and make characters who need each other.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Elorin)

Post #: 14

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 9:05:38 PM

carlie310

Posts: 256
Joined: 9/23/2007
Status: offline

Maybe you could show him this video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSqFqhUzutg

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 15

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 9:12:22 PM

NaiveTempest

Posts: 345
Joined: 11/20/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

My friends and I love gaming. There are so many out there, be it PC or console, paper or board. If you can get over him suddenly coming in and betting your scores, find a new game. I suck at fighters, my friends whip me every time. Use to piss me off a bit, but then I realized it was only a game and I enjoy playing too much to let that ruin the fun of it all. Co-op/2+ player games are a great way to get over that feeling too, though you can end up jealous if they get a higher score on a mission....
I'm sure you'll find a way around the feeling, just remember, there is always another game around the URL, lol.

_____________________________

"All the things I should have said that I never said/All the things we should have done that we never did/All the things I should have given, but I didn't.../Give me these moments back..."

Kate Bush, "This Woman's Work"

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 16

RE: Feeling odd - 1/7/2008 9:30:13 PM

tinoketsheli

Posts: 50
Joined: 12/9/2007
Status: offline

start nibbling on his ear when he is concentrating really hard... that should work...

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 17

RE: Feeling odd - 1/8/2008 5:09:33 AM

SailingBum

Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

This is not a life altering problem. But lately he's had more free time and has started playing the same online games that I do. And a game I have played semi-regularly over a period of years is now something that he plays for two hours and has far outpassed my best score.

And I'm having trouble accepting that. Now I do know that since he's an engineer by training, he is better spatially speaking than I am. But understanding that intellectually and accepting it viscerally are two different things.

Suddenly having him beat my score is taking away my pleasure from the game. So how do I handle this?

See I said it wasn't a life altering problem. Just a small bit of ego deflation going on.

Find a 10 year old to teach you how to play

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 18

RE: Feeling odd - 1/8/2008 5:24:35 AM

MissMorrigan

Posts: 2309
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline

I don't think it's a simple case of feeling deflated. I've experienced this but with a family member (my mother). She loves to play Yahoo Games and when I stayed with her she would spend her personal time playing one specific game, focusing on upping her personal best each time. One night, I was bored and played it, loved the game and beat her score by over 1,000 points. The mistake I made was sharing that with her - okay, okay, I was bragging. What I overlooked is that when she played that game she shut out the world, ie family and background noise and immersed herself into that game... her own little escapism, and something she did on her own without anyone else disturbing her. I ended that by encroaching and it spoiled her enjoyment of the game.

It's important for submissives (and dominants) to have their personal space, something that's entirely for them. I think perhaps your gameplaying was your form of escapism - your 'you' time, and having your partner share in that, that's removed your bit of escapism.

On a side note. I loved playing chess, I still do, but recognise I'm not that good. My boy, Reality, on the other hand, has an excellent analytical mind, and I feel foolish when I play him and I subsequently lose within approx. 8 moves! He doesn't care about winning, he just loves to play with me... the hangup is MINE, not his. When I play, I am competative, when I play him I know that I will lose. I have learned that I am better at certain games on the Wii, so currently focusing on those

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 19

RE: Feeling odd - 1/8/2008 6:18:43 AM

mhawk

Posts: 509
Joined: 11/5/2007
From: Washington
Status: offline

this is exactly why i am glad my Lord has no interest in gaming of any sort.He'd rather sit and watch all the rugby He's recorded through the week.

now my Mistress(His wife) on the other hand likes gaming about as much as i do.what we found works so we are not out doing eachother in the game or making feel like a sense of competetion is this,i play World of Warcraft,we are installing it on Her pc in a few weeks so She can play when i do.but for now,sicne i know more the game, i log Her character on and help Her learn the game.and She enjoys learning it from me.

find a game you both enjoy and learn from eachother on it.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 20

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