explanation

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

explanation

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> explanation

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

explanation - 12/27/2007 9:02:22 AM

simplewhispers

Posts: 232
Joined: 12/27/2006
Status: offline

I have asked lots of questions ,or tried to , most of the time stumbling over the words that I actually want to say. I have been offended and have been told that I also offend by my way of questioning. I would like to offer t his in way of explanation.

When I look at people who are already in a D/s relationship, it is in awe that I see you. The questions even though worded wrong are learning tools for me never meaning to poke at the particular section of the lifestyle that I ask about ie switches.

I do offer my apologies to those that took offense,but how else does one learn?

One last thing there have been a few of you here that actually did not take offense and have tried to help me via pvt message to you I especially thank.
To the rest awwww come on you were new once too.... have mercy on the rest of us ......

_____________________________

A silent woman is always more admired than a noisy one.
Season your admiration for a while With an attent ear. . .

simplewhispers

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: explanation - 12/27/2007 9:06:05 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

You are in awe of people because they are in a relationship? That's probably your first mistake. You only see what people allow you to see. You may be in awe of some scary, dysfunctional relationships.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to simplewhispers)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: explanation - 12/27/2007 9:10:11 AM

simplewhispers

Posts: 232
Joined: 12/27/2006
Status: offline

I may be who knows.

_____________________________

A silent woman is always more admired than a noisy one.
Season your admiration for a while With an attent ear. . .

simplewhispers

(in reply to KatyLied)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: explanation - 12/27/2007 9:28:01 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

Hello simple

I can only suggest that you do not focus on what people think of you or what they think you are saying. Anyone worth your time, will bother to find out and go deeper, everyone else is irrelevant - just a lesson to learn from. If your being yourself and true to yourself, who cares what others think? Remembering that this medium is a limited one, one where there are no vocal inflections or mannerisms or visual clues to what someone is indicating as they speak really helps when reading the words written here. Everyone was new once, but I never came across any negative vibes when I was 'new', but then I believe that depends on how you perceive things, as well as initiate a response. Plus I am responsible for how I feel and how people make me feel... not them.

If you are comfortable with what you have asked and you get negative feedback, let it run off your back and let them go. You will find it incredibly freeing.

Be safe
the.dark.

_____________________________

RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to simplewhispers)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: explanation - 12/27/2007 9:54:38 AM

EvilGenie

Posts: 1323
Joined: 9/10/2007
From: Morocco and Maine occasionally
Status: offline

Yes, the dark, I have been incredibly freed on many threads to which I have posted.

I look at it this way. If someone doesn't like what I have to say, then fine. That is all it is; what I have to say. It isn't who I am nor do many truly know all of who I am. For those few who do assume that they know me and make their negative statements regarding me or my character they are in essence then ''disliking pixels'' as they do not know me. Either way it has to roll off my back. Life is too short to be vexing myself with worry over a message board.

My motto is, disagree with me if you will. Slam me if it makes you feel better but in the end, you don't know me or what I am or do in my real life. I love it when I receive messages similar to ''they hate me.'' Well, if one dimensional words can define who you are in total then please write it down, you'd make millions.

The use of the term 'you' here is not specific to any poster, meaning the plural you.

Best,

EG

**edited to edit as I hit the ok and not the preview.

< Message edited by EvilGenie -- 12/27/2007 9:56:33 AM >

(in reply to RCdc)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: explanation - 12/27/2007 10:03:52 AM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

hi simple, .thedark hit it right on the head. this is an online medium and as such, only words.Nothing can be conveyed beyond a particular person's writing ability, some are better at the conveyance of emotion, intent, humor, etc. than others.

The other thing to remember, as katylied said is that you really cannot, or should not be in awe of anyone here; if indeed you are seeking a well balanced relationship, then there does SEEM to be some people who have them, but you never really know, do you?

My mother always says to me, that you do not know what goes on behind closed doors. And to me, everyone here represents a closed door with little intriguing peeks inside, if we let each other in. And even then, we don't know if what we are seeing is true.

It is far better to treat this online medium and forums in particular, as an exercise in fun, entertainment, and glean whatever knowledge you can but filter it through your own bullshit detector.

As for being new...well it does not matter if you are old or new, people are people and you can only be responsible for your own reactions, not those of others.

(in reply to EvilGenie)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: explanation - 12/27/2007 3:18:28 PM

PanthersMom

Posts: 2215
Joined: 11/26/2007
From: Cleveland Ohio
Status: offline

we all have to learn at our own pace, finding our own path in life. do not envy the path of others, find your own. you may stumble, as we all have done, but in the end, you will learn more about yourself and what you want. that is what is important, not what others have, but what you find in your journey.

PM

_____________________________

That which does not kill me, better run pretty damn fast

I miss my ex, but my aim is improving!

(in reply to sexyred1)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: explanation - 12/27/2007 3:58:25 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: simplewhispers
When I look at people who are already in a D/s relationship, it is in awe that I see you. The questions even though worded wrong are learning tools for me never meaning to poke at the particular section of the lifestyle that I ask about ie switches.

I do offer my apologies to those that took offense,but how else does one learn?

By going through what you are going through.

Sometimes it's best just to ask the question and keep your own thoughts out of it.

quote:

One last thing there have been a few of you here that actually did not take offense and have tried to help me via pvt message to you I especially thank.
To the rest awwww come on you were new once too.... have mercy on the rest of us ......

And how do you think those of us you are in awe of went from being new to the wise awesome people we are?

By going through what you are being put through.

Not that it's the only method, just the one we tend to force ourselves and actually make progress through the most.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to simplewhispers)

Profile

Post #: 8