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Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 4:21:27 PM

grlneedstolearn

Posts: 728
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline

i'm going to hopefully make this post make more sense than my previous posts:
i may have to move back in with my parents and am wondering for those who have been through this or before you met your Dom/Domme, how you handled this. If i have to move back in with my parents, i will not be able to see my Dom due to reasons only him and i know that was in our agreement in the beginning, nor will i be able to play as much with my toys at home. Any suggestions on how to handle this, should it come about? i would still like to play but it would not be possible, and it would only a temporary situation until i get my feet back on solid ground.
Thank you

Post #: 1

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 4:49:00 PM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn
If i have to move back in with my parents, i will not be able to see my Dom due to reasons only him and i know that was in our agreement in the beginning, nor will i be able to play as much with my toys at home. Any suggestions on how to handle this, should it come about? i would still like to play but it would not be possible, and it would only a temporary situation until i get my feet back on solid ground.
Thank you

Temporarily, you won't be able to see him and it won't be possible to play. Therefore, temporarily, it seems you'll just have to survive without play. It's possible

.

Seriously, if you can't play at your parents' home and you can't see him for whatever those mysterious mutually agreed upon reasons are, you're just simply going to have to go for awhile without playing. A stable, serious relationship based on more than play won't suffer irrepairably............luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)

Post #: 2

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 6:42:02 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

I can only suggest to make the period as short as possible- as much as parents love us, I doubt they want to have the situation prolonged either.

Use the time to get a part time job so you can save more money faster.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to slaveluci)

Post #: 3

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 7:08:11 PM

grlneedstolearn

Posts: 728
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline

i may have a job come this wednesday so i'm hoping that i can hold out from moving back into my parent's place. slaveluci the reason in our agreement is that he has his own life and can not and will not commit to a full time d/s relationship.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 4

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 7:44:23 PM

SexyBlackMan2

Posts: 108
Status: offline

that may mean some time apart.

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)

Post #: 5

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 8:08:31 PM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

ok, after rereading and rereading and rereading, i finally understand the original question...i was a bit lost on the side tracks...

honestly...it sounds like a case of a "i made my bed and now i am not so sure i want to lie in it cause it kind of looks uncomfortable so i am gonna ask everyone what they think of how it looks before i get in"...

well, you made the agreement with your Dom, you did whatever it was that got you in the situation that you have to move back in with your parents (i am not saying that is an innately bad thing, so many people our age do, i did too, still there, it sucks...) and honestly...if you don't want to tell us a heck of a lot more details then we're just throwing darts blindly at a very small target as to what will help you get through the situation sanely...

i wish you the best of luck...
chelle

< Message edited by chellekitty -- 12/2/2007 8:17:25 PM >

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to SexyBlackMan2)

Post #: 6

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 8:39:50 PM

ClosetSinner

Posts: 77
Joined: 3/29/2006
Status: offline

I'm assuming that his life outside of you didn't effect your play while you were living presumably on your own, so living with parents I don't see why it should make a difference. You can get a hotel for the night. Preferablly ground floor. Try not to make too much noise that may draw attention in a sticky situation. Hotels do not cost that much. You can also meet in a "vanilla" setting and just talk. Who says play has to be every aspect?

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 7

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 8:54:21 PM

angelsub642

Posts: 57
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline

chellekitty, so i attempted at trying to not make it sound confusing. And it seems that your still with your parents, how do you deal with your Dom/Master/Sir in a situation like this?
And closetsinner, the only issue is that i can be very vocal

(in reply to ClosetSinner)

Post #: 8

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 9:00:02 PM

astarri

Posts: 265
Joined: 4/22/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I can only suggest to make the period as short as possible- as much as parents love us, I doubt they want to have the situation prolonged either.

Use the time to get a part time job so you can save more money faster.

great advice and all i have to offer as well. Do what you can to shorten your stay there as much as possible. Your parents will appreciate this as will your Dom.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 9

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 9:07:26 PM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelsub642

chellekitty, so i attempted at trying to not make it sound confusing. And it seems that your still with your parents, how do you deal with your Dom/Master/Sir in a situation like this?
And closetsinner, the only issue is that i can be very vocal

i respect my parents enough to not have sex in my parents house...i am loud when i have sex, and the other kinds of play are loud on my ass and back...my parents don't want to know about my sex life...

my suggestion....go to his place...if for whatever reason you can't go to his place, go to a hotel....if you can't afford a hotel, you have more serious issues than your lack-a-nookie....

chelle

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to angelsub642)

Post #: 10

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/2/2007 9:09:05 PM

MissSCD

Posts: 1185
Joined: 3/10/2007
Status: offline

I have been through a couple of things. Finances seem to be the reason behind the move..
I moved back in to my home when I lost my home due to divorce. My mother is also aging, and it works out that I am her caregiver now. I would have had to move in with her regardless.
Second, my slave moved in with us for a year, and it did not work out with my mother. He has his own place which is a refuge.
You just need to concentrate on yourself at the moment and allow yourself time to recover your loses if they are financial. Your Dom should be very considerate of this situation and respect your needs. Best of luck to you.

Regards, MissSCD

quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn

i'm going to hopefully make this post make more sense than my previous posts:
i may have to move back in with my parents and am wondering for those who have been through this or before you met your Dom/Domme, how you handled this. If i have to move back in with my parents, i will not be able to see my Dom due to reasons only him and i know that was in our agreement in the beginning, nor will i be able to play as much with my toys at home. Any suggestions on how to handle this, should it come about? i would still like to play but it would not be possible, and it would only a temporary situation until i get my feet back on solid ground.
Thank you

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)

Post #: 11

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/3/2007 5:20:09 AM

HalloweenWhite

Posts: 1028
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn

i'm going to hopefully make this post make more sense than my previous posts:
i may have to move back in with my parents and am wondering for those who have been through this or before you met your Dom/Domme, how you handled this. If i have to move back in with my parents, i will not be able to see my Dom due to reasons only him and i know that was in our agreement in the beginning, nor will i be able to play as much with my toys at home. Any suggestions on how to handle this, should it come about? i would still like to play but it would not be possible, and it would only a temporary situation until i get my feet back on solid ground.
Thank you

This something I've thought about Myself-My flat is not very comfortable at all in winter, but I know that if I go back to My parents it's kind of a dead end for Me due to My disablity-accessable homes are just not being built in this town.

If you do have to move then you may well need to make changes, but as you say, not forever. You and you Dom would just need to be a bit creative, and -you- may have to be creative with the truth with your parents.

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)

Post #: 12

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/3/2007 6:04:17 AM

MrDiscipline44

Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline

I have found that if a person really wants something bad enough, they will go to any lengths to achieve it. This applies to both you and your master. Maybe you both should take a good hard look at why you can't be together while you have to stay at your parents. I also agree with what luci said. If your relationship is based on more then play then it'll survive a little period of no play.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)

Post #: 13

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/3/2007 8:01:38 AM

grlneedstolearn

Posts: 728
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HalloweenWhite

quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn

i'm going to hopefully make this post make more sense than my previous posts:
i may have to move back in with my parents and am wondering for those who have been through this or before you met your Dom/Domme, how you handled this. If i have to move back in with my parents, i will not be able to see my Dom due to reasons only him and i know that was in our agreement in the beginning, nor will i be able to play as much with my toys at home. Any suggestions on how to handle this, should it come about? i would still like to play but it would not be possible, and it would only a temporary situation until i get my feet back on solid ground.
Thank you

This something I've thought about Myself-My flat is not very comfortable at all in winter, but I know that if I go back to My parents it's kind of a dead end for Me due to My disablity-accessable homes are just not being built in this town.

If you do have to move then you may well need to make changes, but as you say, not forever. You and you Dom would just need to be a bit creative, and -you- may have to be creative with the truth with your parents.

i have hinted a little to my parents with very little of what i do and it turned out to be an argument between the three of us, so telling them the truth of the lifestyle is not an option. And they do know about my financial situation so that's not a problem

(in reply to HalloweenWhite)

Post #: 14

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/3/2007 8:47:31 AM

Owner4SexSlave

Posts: 1311
Joined: 4/4/2007
Status: offline

There are times in life when you simply have to do what you need to do. It's just a temporary thing, and you'll survive not being able to play. It's good to spend the time being focused on getting back on your feet instead of playing anyways. Make the best of it.

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)

Post #: 15

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/3/2007 8:54:17 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

I'd ask to renegotiate the arrangement. After all, if you wind up living there for a year I doubt he'll be waiting for you at the end of that time.

And there's a lot of difference between seeing him for a weekend, or even a day at a hotel and fulltime.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to Owner4SexSlave)

Post #: 16

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/3/2007 9:09:26 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

My girlfriend had moved out of my house to go back to school about 3 hours away and I decided to go back to school myself. Since I wasn't single, and dating wasn't an issue I made a hard choice. I sold my home (at the peak of the market, made a killing) and moved in with my mother so I could go to school and not have to work.

It was a good decision on many levels. I will graduate without debt and still have some money. I have actually grown in many ways because living with my mother after all the personal growth I have done allowed me to see in her other things I hadn't yet changed in myself as well as where some of my issues come from. It isn't perfect, I have also fallen back into some old patterns, certain things are more difficult but I am glad I did it.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 17

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/3/2007 9:14:15 AM

grlneedstolearn

Posts: 728
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I'd ask to renegotiate the arrangement. After all, if you wind up living there for a year I doubt he'll be waiting for you at the end of that time.

And there's a lot of difference between seeing him for a weekend, or even a day at a hotel and fulltime.

i do agree with you on him not waiting a year for me to get settled, which it shouldn't if everything plays out right. But yes that is one big big fear of mine, is that i may lose him and have to start over from square 1 again. Right now i see him about 2-3 times a week, and then possibly having to switch to zero times per week will be hard, but it's what would be best for me.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 18

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/3/2007 9:56:49 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn
i do agree with you on him not waiting a year for me to get settled, which it shouldn't if everything plays out right. But yes that is one big big fear of mine, is that i may lose him and have to start over from square 1 again. Right now i see him about 2-3 times a week, and then possibly having to switch to zero times per week will be hard, but it's what would be best for me.

this may be a harsh reality to look at but....if you loose him because of this....perhaps you never had him to begin with?

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)

Post #: 19

RE: Moving back home with parents - 12/3/2007 10:55:30 AM

grlneedstolearn

Posts: 728
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline

chellekitty, that is a good way to look at it, i never thought about that. Thank you for the insight i would have never saw coming

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 20

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