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MsSaskia -> Breathing techniques (11/20/2007 6:40:55 AM)
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Proper breathing can make a huge difference in your tolerance and stress levels during a scene. I teach a biofeedback technique to everyone I play with and my own collared girl has been doing it long enough that she has orgasms during all sorts of play. Even people who've been playing for years and have a very high tolerance have told me that it helps them get a lot more out of a scene.
The breathing technique is one of those things that works better the more you practice it, sort of like yoga. I initially studied this for migraines and it works beautifully for that and all sorts of other things, most importantly play.
The basic steps:
Inhale through your nose to a very slow, steady count of 4. Visualize air filling your lungs from the bottom to the top the way you fill a water balloon from the bottom to the top. Do it nice and slowly so that the entire time you're counting up to 4, you're inhaling. At no point should you feel like you're holding your breath.
When you exhale, you'll be doing it to a slow count of 6. Your exhale will always be 2 counts longer than your inhale. Exhale through your mouth, as if you're playing a flute or whistling. As you're exhaling, visualize all the tension leaving your body with the exhale. Let the tension radiate outwards from the center.
At the end of your exhale, let your body rest a moment or two before you start the inhale through your nose again. Just count 1.... 2.... at the end of your exhale, and then inhale again. During this time, visualize all that tension (the stuff that you were radiating out on you exhale) reaching escape velocity. Picture it being far enough away from your body so that when you inhale again, you're not sucking it back in.
If you practice the breathing daily, you can do it when you're sitting or walking or watching TV or reading or whatever. Try it for 15-20 minutes at a time. Try not to practice it when you're going to sleep, or you'll condition yourself to fall asleep when you do the breathing. The more you practice it, the more useful it will be for you. If you get to a point where you've been practicing for a month or more and the 4/6 count isn't doing anything for you, bump it up to 5-inhale/7-exhale. Just keep the exhale two counts longer than the inhale. You can keep bumping up the count as needed and as it's comfortable for you.
During scenes, if your top has a good rhythm going, just concentrate on letting all the pain radiate through you on the exhale. It's easy to tense up in the area of impact, but that just makes it harder for your body to let it go. If it's easier to visualise the pain washing through you, or your center filling up with more light with every stroke, try that. Your body holds less tension on the exhale, so paying attention to where your energy is going during that part of your breath is important. If your top does not have a particular rhythm going and wants to help you ramp up to more or increase your tolerance, have him/her strike at the top of your exhale, which'll give you a chance to release everything through the six-count (or whatever) of your exhale. They just have to watch your rib cage and shoulders to get the timing right.
Of the hundreds of people I've taught this technique to, only one rejected it. He said it took away too much of the pain and it wasn't intense enough. I trusted him enough to let him make that choice. Another person who hated it was the Mistress of a boy I played with. The breathing increased his tolerance enough that she had to work much, much harder to take him where she wanted him to go and she just didn't have the stamina, so she started asking him tricky questions while she beat him to break up his deep breathing.
EDIT: the breathing also helps while you're coming down from a scene. It lessens bottom drop considerably because it lets your body adjust gradually from the high instead of there being a sudden shift.
Let me know if you have any questions re the breathing.
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