RE: The Question (Full Version)

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MystressDream -> RE: The Question (11/14/2007 2:17:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

OK I am going to jump back to the original question, which is what makes me happy.
Now its tangent time. For me there are two separate ideas that get confused a lot, happiness and what for lack of a better word I will call joy.
           Happiness is something that is externally based. That means that things outside of me can affect my happiness quotient. If I hit the lotto, guess what I am going to be happy, shit I will even be thrilled. On the contrary, should I walk out for work this morning and my car is gone, I am gonna be unhappy, quite a bit. To say that I am happy all the time would be to deny my emotions and the capacity that events have to affect me. Stuff happens, good and bad and an emotional response is evoked. I would love to say that I am so spiritually advanced that nothing affects my even keeled approach to life, but that’s just not so. Maybe if I ever each the eighth rung of buddhism that will happen but for now, if I leave work and someone has burned my house down, I am not going to experience equilibrium, I am going to be pissed. So to answer your immediate question, lots of things make me happy. Sunny days, pretty women, obedience, new friends, old friends, success, raises, family, beaches etc... There are also lots of things make me unhappy, most of which boil down to things just didn’t go the way I wanted them to.  What I don’t do anymore is confuse pleasure with happiness. Au contraire.  Matter of fact some of the things that have brought me the greatest pleasure over the years have brought me the greatest pain. I cannot be the only one who has been with someone who is fantastic in bed but awful in life or made a decision based on short term pleasure that cost me tremendously over the long run.             Now joy is a different beast entirely. That’s something that is internal and no outside events can touch that. For me its simply being alive, the sheer exuberance of life. I wake up and know that today is a special gift, that there will never be another today as long as eternity lasts and that I am graced to participate in it. That enables me to approach life from a vantage point that dissapates much of the external affects. Am I unhappy if my house burns down, you betcha. But I still am alive, I still have hope and I still have the opportunity to see, taste, touch, feel and hear. So that cannot be shaken. That’s just my two cents worth, take it for what its worth.


Wow!!  Beautifully said, Sir.  Thank you for sharing and kicking some thought processes into high gear.




RumpusParable -> RE: The Question (11/14/2007 2:25:52 PM)

I read the journal entry...

... and to answer the question of "What would make you happy?" I'd have to in all sincerity answer:  Getting the damned leak in my bathroom fixed.

That the first, foremost and strongest answer to my happiness in life right now at this moment.

I'm just thankful that the leak is a constantly running bathtub faucet and not something running all over the floors or dripping through the ceiling.  We've been trying all the methods that don't involve me cutting a big hole in my bathroom wall, now it's come down to popping that tile of and opening it up...and praying that works.

Because I'm laying here right now listening to that water run and am sick to death of lukewarm showers.




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: The Question (11/14/2007 6:47:11 PM)

Padriag- Yay authority!

For me?  I'm all about the happy, increase happiness all the way, happy happy happy, more happy.

But in the end, it's not about happy.  Happy is so transitory.  Heck, some days bliss just means sliding into bed.  For a lot of people in the world, bliss means eating a full clean meal.

I'm all about the fulfillment.  Long term.  Serving self.

Oh and while I DO love taking control of my boss by forcing him to use the intercom because it annoys me when he yells over at me- I also recognize it's a fairly flimsy and small point in the larger scheme of things.  He is clueless on how much I understand and control how his world flows at work, but he has the ultimate authority to remove me.

The important thing is to not let that enter his mind as an option, and certainly not as an appealing one.




Padriag -> RE: The Question (11/14/2007 9:02:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: scottjk

I guess I should have quibbled just a little with juliaoceania. ;)

No, I don't consider it a service. :) I consider it a necessity for a desired result for both, rather than just my own needs. We're more similar than you realize. Just distracted or influenced by others. lol

We may be, I don't know enough about you to say yet and I based that one observation on what you wrote.  I am enjoying your posts and learning a bit more about you, you seem interesting and intelligent.  In particular I liked the post you made on another thread regarding the differences between the Gay community and the BDSM community, I thought you made a some excellent points and were very thorough.

Please do continue to share your thoughts, this has been among the more interesting discussions I've seen lately.




Padriag -> RE: The Question (11/14/2007 9:11:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Padriag- Yay authority!

Your legacy lives on. [;)]




scottjk -> RE: The Question (11/14/2007 9:33:27 PM)

quote:


(shrug) you've said what you said, whether you recognize it or not is the issue.  I didn't imply any of those things on that list however and I can see any attempt at a conversation on this isn't going anywhere.  Good luck to you.


Well, I had thought I had responded effectively. The problem is the assumption that I was speaking globally. I wasn't, I was answering from my point of view, not of the relationship. Now, my reply was one sided, but certainly didn't imply that I see such a relationship as one sided. I'm also not a service top, however, I'm not so self serving as to be only concerned with my own needs. Only a fool takes the one they care about for granted.

While I'm all for conversation, sharing of ideas, contrasting them, comparing them, I wasn't inviting debate, which is by definition not a conversation, but a tool to bring about opossing views and defending them. Honestly, I've had enough debate in my life. :) That isn't to say that I only interested in responses that agree with me either. You can disagree, you just can't tell me I'm wrong. You can always get your idea and thoughts across without telling anyone they're wrong.

Honestly, after seeing the responses, some where reading far more than what I said. I did meantion that I'm a poor writer, and I'm not much for subtlety because, simply put, I often miss the subtle and it frustrates me. So I avoid it in everything I do. Some people think that subtle is a sign of a sophisticated and complex mind. Perhaps, but is it really all that useful? I find simple things show a more sophisticated and complex mind, simply because it shows that such things should not be used when they're not really needed.




scottjk -> RE: The Question (11/14/2007 9:42:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Padriag- Yay authority!

For me?  I'm all about the happy, increase happiness all the way, happy happy happy, more happy.

But in the end, it's not about happy.  Happy is so transitory.  Heck, some days bliss just means sliding into bed.  For a lot of people in the world, bliss means eating a full clean meal.

I'm all about the fulfillment.  Long term.  Serving self.

Oh and while I DO love taking control of my boss by forcing him to use the intercom because it annoys me when he yells over at me- I also recognize it's a fairly flimsy and small point in the larger scheme of things.  He is clueless on how much I understand and control how his world flows at work, but he has the ultimate authority to remove me.

The important thing is to not let that enter his mind as an option, and certainly not as an appealing one.


You go girl!

LA got my point out of the gate. She looked at The Question, asked herself, and it turns out the simple answers are usually the best ones. :)

Right now, my answer to The Question is, spicy chicken teriyaki and a soda, I could make a peanut butter sandwich with a glass of water, but it wouldn't make me happy. :)

My advice? If you're looking for answers, keep it simple! It makes for a more peaceful life. :)




breatheasone -> RE: The Question (11/15/2007 7:50:12 AM)

You know...I don't think I want to be fixed, as much as I  wanted someone that would, or could put up with me lol. ThankYou Master for being the One! Be happy...breathe....




rmanrr -> RE: The Question (11/15/2007 6:05:47 PM)

Greetings
To no one in particular...I know what makes Me happy...waking each day ready to take on the challenges it will bring. What brings joy is a certain female who will be here in short order.




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