Exploring pain alone (Full Version)

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MasterRory -> Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 1:27:49 AM)

This has been prompted by an online sub I know who wishes to explore pain
Obviously it is more difficult to explore by yourself, but I would say that it is just more of a challenge, a discipline to be learnt.
So, does anyone have any ideas?
I was thinking self spanking, hot wax,cutting,hot then cold and vice versa.

thank you



MidnightMaiden -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 2:25:03 AM)

I would say it depends on the individual.  I tried something as simple as pegging myself with clothespins, and after pinning myself into a state of arousal and eventual climax, I very strongly felt the absence of any aftercare.  Obviously this isnt applicable to everybody, however it is something to consider.



ResidentSadist -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 2:34:06 AM)

Now you know a sadist had to come and read this thread right? 

I would think that spanking is more interactive and effective with two people.  Things like needles, clamps and electro torture seem to hold their bite whether someone else is involved or not.



Kellendra -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 3:04:20 AM)

Was going to suggest pegs.....has fond memories of pegs.
I personally did not find any issues with a lack of aftercare...but at the time was quite unaware such a thing even exsisited, MidnightMaiden makes a wonderfully valid point.
Is likely something people(myself included) wouldn't even think to take into account, kudos to you MM.



scottjk -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 3:44:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterRory

This has been prompted by an online sub I know who wishes to explore pain
Obviously it is more difficult to explore by yourself, but I would say that it is just more of a challenge, a discipline to be learnt.
So, does anyone have any ideas?
I was thinking self spanking, hot wax,cutting,hot then cold and vice versa.

thank you


Well, an idea I have in mind involves sitting/standing/laying on a plastic carpet runner with the spike side up. Not that I have an obsession of such a thing, (mentioned such a thing in another post), but it seems to lend itself to handily to pain management. (chuckle)



Rockbound -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 6:02:52 AM)


Certainly one can explore pain alone. Do some searches and you'll find that much has been written on topics such as self-spanking, self-bondage, electrical torture, and many others. There are many practitioners and they've covered the territory well in their writings.

You can learn much about your own reactions and limits this way. However, keep in mind that you probably won't push yourself as far as an experienced top would. Of course, you're also missing out on all the other benefits that a partner brings. Still, if you don't have someone readily available to administer the pain, doing it yourself is a good way of getting some experience. With that experience, you'll be better prepared to work with a good top when you find one.



juliaoceania -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 8:48:57 AM)

I played online for my first dom before we met in person because he was curious as to whether I had masochistic tendencies. I bruised my own nipples rather badly because it turned out I was far more of a masochist than he thought I would be... and as a result we did not play like that again until we met in person because he did not want me to harm myself... (the bruising was significant on my nipples).

Tread carefully... you are not there to guide the person and unexpected things can happen.



Switchblayde -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 1:31:53 PM)

I have done self needle play on cam as a video intro on another site.
You could train her on less sensitive areas first, directing her on cam.




quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterRory

This has been prompted by an online sub I know who wishes to explore pain
Obviously it is more difficult to explore by yourself, but I would say that it is just more of a challenge, a discipline to be learnt.
So, does anyone have any ideas?
I was thinking self spanking, hot wax,cutting,hot then cold and vice versa.

thank you



breatheasone -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 1:39:50 PM)

I personally would get zero enjoyment out of hurting myself...I joined collarme cause I was looking for a partner, and didn't want to play alone. Masturbating is only so satisfying,  before it gets old.



missturbation -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/13/2007 2:20:47 PM)

I tend to agree with breatheasone here.
Also i think to explore on your own is not a good measure of how much pain you can take or want. I am far more masochistic in Sirs presence than i am on my own.
The experience will be different, going solo vs having a person to interact with there.
Also as others have said i cant give myself after care.



laurell3 -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 10:39:44 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

I tend to agree with breatheasone here.
Also i think to explore on your own is not a good measure of how much pain you can take or want. I am far more masochistic in Sirs presence than i am on my own.
The experience will be different, going solo vs having a person to interact with there.
Also as others have said i cant give myself after care.


I agree.  While I still to some extent get aroused by causing myself mild pain, the mental stimulus of having someone else there controlling or participating makes it rather hollow for me.



slaveluci -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 2:49:32 PM)

Ever tried tickling yourself?  Doesn't quite work like someone else doing it.  Same goes for me with spanking or any type of bondage, pain, etc.  Doing it for or by myself just takes all the excitement out of it.  I'm sure it is very possible for some folks to do and enjoy it.  Just saying it isn't something that works for me personally......luci



petdave -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 3:27:44 PM)

Let's see... there are some good ones already mentioned. i'll add suction (pumping, cupping, etc), heating ointments, forced dilation with toys, TENS device, and bondage for discomfort (breast ties, having them maintain uncomfortable positions, etc.)



juliaoceania -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 3:29:25 PM)

fr

I find it interesting that I am the only one here that has found pleasure in inflicting pain on myself. I did so at the order of a dominant, which was a very erotic thing for me... but that is just how my wiring works I suppose



kyraofMists -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 3:39:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

fr

I find it interesting that I am the only one here that has found pleasure in inflicting pain on myself. I did so at the order of a dominant, which was a very erotic thing for me... but that is just how my wiring works I suppose


You are not the only one; I just hadn't posted yet  *g*

I used clothespins on myself before I even met my Lord.  I have used them and ripped them off at his instruction.  A couple of times he was even present when he made me do this.  I am regularly instructed to flick or pinch my nipples. 

I enjoy it and get pleasure from it.  I also get pleasure from the pain of exercising.  I have been so sore I can barely walk the next day and I really enjoy it.

Knight's Kyra



juliaoceania -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 4:50:02 PM)

quote:

I enjoy it and get pleasure from it.  I also get pleasure from the pain of exercising.  I have been so sore I can barely walk the next day and I really enjoy it.


When Sinergy and I were not seeing each other I threw myself into my exercise regime with full force and I lost about 25 to 30 lbs within a few months... it helped ease my masochistic tendencies[:D]

Fast forward with us being back together... he took me to the gym with him last week and gave me certain exercises to do... I have a question Kyra, have you ever visited a gym with KoM? Going to the gym with a sadist that wants to see you get better results is something I would only recommend for a masochist[:D]. I now have him fine tuning my regime, and I am seeing even better results in how my muscles are responding... ouch, but it is sweet torture[;)]



kyraofMists -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 5:10:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania
I have a question Kyra, have you ever visited a gym with KoM?


LOL  Just trying to picture him in a gym.  When I move, Alandra and I are going to join the local gym and his response to asking him if he would come with us, "not fucking likely" were I think his words.... 

Truthfully, though his job keeps him so busy it would be difficult for him to go to a gym.  I would love for the three of us to workout together, but at this point I am the one with the more knowledge and what I know wouldn't even fit in a thimble.  His strength comes from physical labor and he used to play hockey when he was younger.  From what I understand he used to be quite flexible  *eg*

The one thing that I do, is call him after going.  He wants to know how hard I worked, how tired I am and where do I hurt.  He tries each time to say, "Awwww, that's too bad" without laughing.  I don't think he has managed it yet in the past year.

I do see a physical trainer a couple times a month and I think he has a few sadistic tendencies...  I am not losing weight, but I am losing inches and getting stronger.

Knight's Kyra



petdave -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 5:44:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania
I find it interesting that I am the only one here that has found pleasure in inflicting pain on myself.


Oh, not at all... i can certainly enjoy pain without needing to to be applied by someone else. i just left it unsaid since it's much less glamorous when i do it [8D]



juliaoceania -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 5:48:48 PM)

Since I started lifting I have not lost weight, but inches too... that would be about 6 weeks now... and personal trainers probably have to be somewhat sadistic...lol. There are lots of ways to stay fit and be sadistic... I am sure KoM could think of a few ways to combine the two if he wanted...lol




happyplayer06 -> RE: Exploring pain alone (11/14/2007 5:51:00 PM)

It was my experience that exploring pain by myself was not a good base for play as a submissive.

When you play by yourself you have (almost) total and instant control of your sensation. You know exactly how close to your limit you are getting. With a partner there is that distinct difference of surrendering control and the delay involved in having to communicate your limit and having that communication interpreted and acted upon by the Domme.

Someone has suggested heating creams, this was pretty close to being out of control for me. There is that delay between applying it and the fully developed sensation, and the inability to do much about it once it has started. (We don't get "Bengay" here, or "Icyhot", Sloan's "Deep Heat" will make you seriously consider the apparently immenent development of blisters). Cold compresses provide some relief. If it is winter, immersion in cold water up to your waist might not be an option. As a first time experience there is a strong mental aspect as the pain grows and you have no real way of knowing how far it will go or how long it will last. Afterwards you become a bit more circumspect with regard to the total area you apply it to.

Self bondage can go someway to removing control but going the whole hog with locks and timers seems fraught with unaceptable risk and most of the info available on line seems to be more a form of masturbation for the writers than a fact based guide.

I never had much luck spanking myself, by hand was just a joke, with a cane I had trouble with the aim unless it was just a tap. I did have some success beating my own penis with a wooden ruler, that is intense if you set your self a number of strokes and don't make the last few lighter. Can't keep the rythm though.

If your online sub hasn't experimented with self inflicted pain yet it would seem that they are probably not really into it, or they have a really limited imagination. 

I think the real value of self inlicted pain is for a Dom/me to get a real experience of the sensation before applying it to a sub. So maybe you should knock yourself out experimenting and then have some real life with your sub.

happy happy



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