Help with understanding "Scening" (Full Version)

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mya75 -> Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 9:06:41 AM)

I have been reading a lot on scening lately and for me it still remains something like an act or play to me ...So I guess I am asking for input from people who are in 24/7's and how scening works for them...Thanks in advance for all the input *smiles*



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 9:14:12 AM)

A "scene" in bdsm parlance tends to be just a particular time structured to be focused on "playing together."

There are many definitions to the word scene- "He caused an awful scene"  "There was a horrible scene of a car crash as we drove home."

And there's also "The scene" which is used more generally to describe an overall sub culture.

However, it can also be used in the theatrical sense- costumes, lighting, props, stage direction.  Some people take this pretty literally.  But that's THEIR kink and it doesn't mean it's like stage actors playing out lines, it's taking elements of mise en scene and incorporating it into the flow of THEIR scene.

Use whatever language works for you- a lot of people don't like the word "scene" or "play"  For me I think they are appropriate and work just fine.  If someone wants to come up to me after a scene and say "You weren't scening, that was too real"  well that's their choice.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_272262/mpage_3/key_scene/tm.htm#272876
WHy is it called a scene?




bipolarber -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 10:38:31 AM)

There's a certain theatrical element to WIITWD, definitely. LA is quite right, the basic definition is just a time together, an encounter.

Scenes can be spontaneous, with just you "play acting" as you masturbate, or as carefully crafted as a Broadway production of "TheLion King," involving cast, props, lighting, music, and a script. Usually, they are more like "living theatre" where the cast becomes part of the surroundings, and spin the "reality" of the venue off into something of a heightened state of experience. Both for those involved in the actual performance, and possibly for those watching as well. (This is usually the case at parties, when someone is doing a demo, or possibly just an encounter that catches everyone's attention.)

Some people object to the implied artifice of calling BDSM "theatre"... My response is that Shakespeare was right: all the world is a stage, and all the men and women merely players. If you are going to play... then demand a starring role!



slaveofKaos -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 10:41:26 AM)

I agree totally with LA an bipolarber. A specific time set aside to "play."



eyesopened -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 2:59:12 PM)

i used to have trouble with the term myself because it seemed everyone in my munch group talked about 'doing a scene' or ask me why i wouldn't want to go to a play party and 'just scene' with someone.  It always sounded like playacting and i'm not an actress and would feel false to me.

But it doesn't matter what others do and they should not have projected their dynamics onto me.

When we are together, all that we do is part of our 'scene' from watching tv together or engaging in bondage (or watching tv while in bondage) or being chained to the cross, there is an easy transition, no playacting.  i was going to say that our 'scene' starts when i get off the plane on my visits there and ends when i get on the plane to go home, but since talk at least twice every day i guess it never really ends.  :)



slavegirljoy -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 6:50:16 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mya75
So I guess I am asking for input from people who are in 24/7's and how scening works for them

It doesn't work for me.  i don't 'scene' and, never have.  It just doesn't interest me.

slave joy
Owned property of Master David



mya75 -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 6:51:57 PM)

I am the exact way it feels like play acting I just didnt know if others felt this way...but its nice to know I am not the only one *smiles*



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 6:58:57 PM)

Would you tell me after waxing my partner for two hours using a dozen different instruments and a crock pot filled with melted wax that that we didn't have a "scene" because it was too real?  Or that what we experienced wasn't real because we called it a "scene?"



slavegirljoy -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 7:01:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mya75

I am the exact way it feels like play acting I just didnt know if others felt this way...but its nice to know I am not the only one *smiles*

Different things for different people.  Some people enjoy doing scenes and some don't.  i also have never had an interest in going to munches.  It just doesn't hold any interest for me.  i much rather spend my time being tied to a tree in the woods, blindfolded and geting my naked tits whipped by my Master.  That's a much nicer way for me to spend a couple of hours.

slave joy
Owned property of Master David



slavegirljoy -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 7:39:55 PM)

To me, doing a scene is very real for the people doing it but, i also think of it as being 'set-up' and not spontaneous.  While i have never been involved in doing scenes, from what i have read and been told, scening involves some prior discussion between the people involved in it and some negotiations about what will and will not be done and how long it can last and establishing the safeword that will be used, etc.  When my Master uses me, there is no discussion about it, no negotiations and no safeword involved.  It's spontaneous and lasts as long as He wants it to last and it stops only when He feels that it should stop.  To me, that doesn't make it any more "real" than a scene is.  It just makes it different.

slave joy
Owned property of Master David

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Would you tell me after waxing my partner for two hours using a dozen different instruments and a crock pot filled with melted wax that that we didn't have a "scene" because it was too real?  Or that what we experienced wasn't real because we called it a "scene?"



azropedntied -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 8:16:03 PM)

The term Scene to me is of a scriped or thought out act , thats the way i take it your definition may differ ,and thats ok too . Though i have done scene's where i think of the activity and somewhat plan , more often i feed off the energy with the partner .I tend to call what is shared  our exchange .I too am not big into the muches thing where we all sit around in a public place sip our drinks and chat .I think  there is no wrong answer here as i have done and been involved in both scenes and exchanges  and have enjoyed them.I do feel the same scene or exchange done time and time again  get tiresome and boring .Nothing wrong with scripting out a scene now and then  like making you subbie a well wrapped holiday package  adding some lights .brings a whole new use for tinsle.



mya75 -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 8:44:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Would you tell me after waxing my partner for two hours using a dozen different instruments and a crock pot filled with melted wax that that we didn't have a "scene" because it was too real?  Or that what we experienced wasn't real because we called it a "scene?"

Not at all ...thats why its interesting to see all sides of the topic



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 9:02:13 PM)

So you agree that scenes are as real as anything and that the term "a scene" has nothing to do with how deep or real the experience is versus anything else?

I agree that "a scene" is not the same thing as "playing" or "doing something kinky together."  I play a LOT more often than I have "a scene."  But the idea that one is "real" while the other is "play acting" isn't how it is for most people.



Archer -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 9:16:18 PM)

Another instance of a word having a charged meaning for some.
There are folks who can't get past the term "play" and instead use the term "work". (Many gay leathermen use this term).
There view being that children play mjen work.
OK if that's what works for them then great, does not mean that my play is childish or that my play is less than their work.
Scene holds a connotation for some that they just can't get past, to communicate it is only nessisary that we each know the definitions/word that the other uses.





mya75 -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 9:28:24 PM)

I can only answer for myself and for me it seems to be play acting that is why I havent gotten into it .....



mya75 -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 9:29:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Archer

Scene holds a connotation for some that they just can't get past, to communicate it is only nessisary that we each know the definitions/word that the other uses.




Nicely stated!!



daddyncherry -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 9:31:44 PM)

i was one of those that initially got squicked by the word "play"...it rang of faslehood and i thought that anything with beating (etc) was for punishment or discipline sake and i couldn't wrap my head around it when my Daddy would call it play....i didn't want to play-EWWWW....lol...if i were being beaten i wanted it to mean something. (i was not and still am not into play for the sensation of it)

my Daddy isn't a "punisher" so to speak so that is just about never the reason that he does something with "toys"..there is however a reason....He chooses to.

When we do "play" it is never scripted out (though i would love ad lib role play)..we never actually negotiated...there are no safewords..he goes as long or short as he chooses to...i guess it's a scene...where we mostly do it in public places (if it's something extended) and mostly there is some kind of audience in attendance. Soooo i guess it is like live theatre..like "Who's Whip Is It Anyway" or something...done totally on the fly and decided as he goes and how he feels....spontaneous.



azropedntied -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 9:35:36 PM)

Well put Archer ..
Work and job are not terms i peronaly would use either in bdsm as work to me does not indicate  fun . just my personal view .Again use what works around your  head space ,some terms  rub me wrong too , i just choose not to use them .



Jayxkes -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/4/2007 11:55:49 PM)

What's in a name?  Would not that which we call a rose,  smell just as sweet by any other name?

There is a danger in getting too hung up over the words people use,  the labels we each give things.   Whether you call a BDSM interaction play, a  scene, a spontaneous & serious D/s interaction between two consenting and risk aware adults, fun or fred,  it's all the same thing.

We need words to be able to talk about what we want to talk about.  As long as we understand waht's being said,  it really doesn't matter what words are used.  If someone is talking about play or scene and you are unsure, even from the context in which it's said, what the mean.  Then simply ask.  





SirMichealspeach -> RE: Help with understanding "Scening" (11/5/2007 4:36:14 AM)

To me "a scene" and "play" are two different things.  When Master and I go to a club or "play party", We do a "scene". some aspects of it have been discussed before hand and others not. When we are at home alone and He wants to "play", its not a thought out drawn out process. He may bend me over His knee for a short spanking, or He may put me on the cross and keep me there for an hour, doesn't matter when its just the Two of us.   None of it is ever a game. I personally prefer the word "scene" primarily because i don't like "play".  but as has been said in these forums 1000 times or more  " To each His/Her own" It all comes down to what the people in the dynamic at the time choose to call or not call whatever they are doing.
sub_peach_ 4 Sir Micheal



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