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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 7:29:46 AM   
RRafe


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quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

Right, sammie? I read RRafe's post very early this morning and couldn't function well enough to respond. RRafe, you gots talent, at least with turning a phrase and setting up an imaginary scene.


I'm quite real-I can provide quite a few refferences of local bdsm people who know me-and have seen me playing in clubs here-or bottomed to me.


< Message edited by RRafe -- 11/3/2007 7:30:21 AM >

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 7:55:27 AM   
batshalom


Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline 		No worries, RRafe. I wouldn't need refs. I'm pretty well experimental. The only problem is I tend to equate play with deeper feelings, and after such an intimate and personal scene I'm afraid you'd have a sub with a bad case of the LoveBug.

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 7:58:53 AM   
RRafe


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Joined: 8/29/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

No worries, RRafe. I wouldn't need refs. I'm pretty well experimental. The only problem is I tend to equate play with deeper feelings, and after such an intimate and personal scene I'm afraid you'd have a sub with a bad case of the LoveBug.


I do quite expect such things to happen. Which is why I am in no particular hurry to rush back into a relationship right now. I really don;t want to get into one of those annoying things where somone wants to follow me home-just because she liked the way I played with her in the local dungeon-been there, done that.

Friends first-then-we'll see.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:19:27 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		17.92 minutes exactly. 


All kidding aside, I'd be hardpressed to give a time.  Time tends to lose meaning in these situations.  I guess I've never been in a situation that was a full-on, really long, extended exposure to pain in one area only.  Don't get me wrong, I've taken quite a bit and enjoy it, but if we're talking about stopping and interchanging sensation with other types of things, which is probably more realistic for many, then the timeline is extended much more.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:25:43 AM   
batshalom


Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline 		"Friends first then we'll see" is equivalent to

"Mommm, can I have a puppy?"
"Hm. We'll see."

She didn't say no so she must mean YES!

It's that excited "Ohhhh, this is great!" feeling, anticipation, waiting ... but the only problem is ... sometimes "We'll see" means "Mommy does not want to get into a battle of wills right now so go build a doghouse to keep your little self busy for awhile. If I wait long enough, you'll forget allllll about that puppy."

I was one of those kids who didn't stop at the doghouse. I named it, made clothes for it, saved my allowance for its food, and called for fence estimates.

(As a woman of 40-something, it is why I don't do casual play or scene with "we'll see friends". I know myself too well.) It's all a matter of knowing one's limitations. Although after considering it for awhile, it's definitely on my list of regrets. "I regret I didn't scene casually with RRafe."

Ohhh dear. And that seems so easily fixable too. I hate regrets.

Maybe in your case I could make an exception.

(I'm such a pig.)

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:29:23 AM   
RRafe


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quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

"Friends first then we'll see" is equivalent to

"Mommm, can I have a puppy?"
"Hm. We'll see."

She didn't say no so she must mean YES!

It's that excited "Ohhhh, this is great!" feeling, anticipation, waiting ... but the only problem is ... sometimes "We'll see" means "Mommy does not want to get into a battle of wills right now so go build a doghouse to keep your little self busy for awhile. If I wait long enough, you'll forget allllll about that puppy."

I was one of those kids who didn't stop at the doghouse. I named it, made clothes for it, saved my allowance for its food, and called for fence estimates.

(As a woman of 40-something, it is why I don't do casual play or scene with "we'll see friends". I know myself too well.) It's all a matter of knowing one's limitations. Although after considering it for awhile, it's definitely on my list of regrets. "I regret I didn't scene casually with RRafe."

Ohhh dear. And that seems so easily fixable too. I hate regrets.

Maybe in your case I could make an exception.

(I'm such a pig.)


Smiles..........."we'll see" usually means non sexual for quite a while. Have had a few really crazy ones in the past. Came from seeing kink as more important than personality-very very stupid on my part.

But with friends-just friends? I'll keep my options open. I have a business to get set up-interesting people I am working with to get there-time really WILL tell. Not as if I have nothing better to do.

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:35:58 AM   
gracieamelia


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

I doubt it, too.  A girl once told me she was flogged for two hours straight and loved it.  I said if Master flogged me for two hours straight, I'd be in sorry shape.  She insisted I must just be a wimp (duh) and 2 hours is nothing.

Upon further questioning, I discovered he was flogging her with silk.


emotionally this would be a marathon for me and physically I'd need a week of bedest...silk, leather or chains

reaching for some cymbolta 

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:39:08 AM   
batshalom


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quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

Smiles..........."we'll see" usually means non sexual for quite a while. Have had a few really crazy ones in the past. Came from seeing kink as more important than personality-very very stupid on my part.



Yes yes. Sex has a way of mucking things up. I've had a few really crazy ones in the past as well, seeing kink, scening, and sex as the beginnings of a beautifuly happily-ever-after when, in fact, it was just kink, scening, and sex to the other person(s), which also meant the same for me. I can be extraordinarly hardheaded though.

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:41:47 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
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Status: offline 		I'm with you Batshalom....I despise "We'll see".....HATE it even....lol....but thats just me....

_____________________________

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:46:21 AM   
RRafe


Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline 		I'm a real asshole when it comes to casual sex or play. It stems a lot from my objectification fetish. When I do a casual scene, a bottom is just a piece of meat to me. Something I am using to get a pleasureable reaction out of. I do just enough to make the scene safe for us both-and make sure we both stay in bounds. But I also play with very intense energy, and it can have a very strong impact on someone who bottoms to me that way. Thing is, I may not be willing to keep feeding the hunger I awaken-and that gets a bad reaction-when I decide to say no.

So really, I have to look at a bigger picture now. I don't want to forge bonds that I won't be able to honor later-especially with women that can't possibly integrate into the sort of life I am planning to lead.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:48:54 AM   
batshalom


Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline 		That's the good thing about aging, RRafe. ~smiling~ Well-defined boundaries.

< Message edited by batshalom -- 11/3/2007 8:49:17 AM >

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:50:59 AM   
laurell3


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Joined: 5/5/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

I'm with you Batshalom....I despise "We'll see".....HATE it even....lol....but thats just me....


I agree, however, having talked to Rrafe about this topic, I know that he doesn't mean play and we'll see if we fit, he means no play and we'll see if we fit.  Which is admirable.


_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

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Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 8:54:04 AM   
gracieamelia


Posts: 26
Joined: 10/21/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

No worries, RRafe. I wouldn't need refs. I'm pretty well experimental. The only problem is I tend to equate play with deeper feelings, and after such an intimate and personal scene I'm afraid you'd have a sub with a bad case of the LoveBug.


Why or how should intimate "feelings" always = love?

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 9:06:44 AM   
breatheasone


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Joined: 7/14/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

I'm with you Batshalom....I despise "We'll see".....HATE it even....lol....but thats just me....


I agree, however, having talked to Rrafe about this topic, I know that he doesn't mean play and we'll see if we fit, he means no play and we'll see if we fit.  Which is admirable.


I was speaking of the term "we'll see" in general. Sorry there was confusion


_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
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candy posts in pink font

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Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 9:07:55 AM   
RRafe


Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

I'm with you Batshalom....I despise "We'll see".....HATE it even....lol....but thats just me....


I agree, however, having talked to Rrafe about this topic, I know that he doesn't mean play and we'll see if we fit, he means no play and we'll see if we fit.  Which is admirable.




Admirable? More of a defense mechanism. I just want to avoid starting something I can't finish.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 9:10:28 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		oh Rrafe stop trying to avoid being cuddly dom.  It is admirable that you can forsee that you may end up in a situation that hurts one or both parties.  Use whatever word you want, however, I was merely pointing out it wasn't in the disposable sub context we see it in often.


_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to RRafe)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 9:23:29 AM   
RRafe


Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

oh Rrafe stop trying to avoid being cuddly dom.  It is admirable that you can forsee that you may end up in a situation that hurts one or both parties.  Use whatever word you want, however, I was merely pointing out it wasn't in the disposable sub context we see it in often.



Or the disposable dom concept. I know that peoiple hurt each other inadvertently.  Sensation play is just goofing around with nerves. But humans are wired with certain instinctive responses that DO program them, in the right situations. And I know what I am capable of-with the right sort of woman. I'm more than a little wary of how badly power like that can be weilded.

I beleive that I am accountable to a higher power in the end. And how I treat the creations of that power-is going to be my ultimate judgement.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

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Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 10:59:51 AM   
batshalom


Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: gracieamelia

quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

No worries, RRafe. I wouldn't need refs. I'm pretty well experimental. The only problem is I tend to equate play with deeper feelings, and after such an intimate and personal scene I'm afraid you'd have a sub with a bad case of the LoveBug.


Why or how should intimate "feelings" always = love?


I'm not saying they do for everyone. They do for me, always have, maybe always will. I cannot separate the two things, and god knows I've tried. A lot. Like so often that I should win some kind of award.

Ahhh crap.

~heavy sigh, writing another therapy check~

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 3:03:15 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I'm not sure about slicing flesh open type whipping for four hours straight- but varied strokes and stuff I could see that happening.  Of course the fact that this is a guy who places focus on TIME of a scene over actually connecting with the person says more than anything.

The physical body can withstand a lot more than most masochists would ever desire to approach- that doesn't necessarily mean you want to do that in a scene.

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RE: Endurance---how long can you go? - 11/3/2007 3:20:37 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

oh Rrafe stop trying to avoid being cuddly dom.  It is admirable that you can forsee that you may end up in a situation that hurts one or both parties.  Use whatever word you want, however, I was merely pointing out it wasn't in the disposable sub context we see it in often.



Or the disposable dom concept. I know that peoiple hurt each other inadvertently.  Sensation play is just goofing around with nerves. But humans are wired with certain instinctive responses that DO program them, in the right situations. And I know what I am capable of-with the right sort of woman. I'm more than a little wary of how badly power like that can be weilded.

I beleive that I am accountable to a higher power in the end. And how I treat the creations of that power-is going to be my ultimate judgement.


It's that pesky hormone, oxytocin. Once you get to a woman, even if just sensation play, some get emotionally attached to that object that made them feel that way. So, I also agree with the ladies that say it is admirable that you prioritize your long term goals over your short term fun.

(in reply to RRafe)
Profile   Post #: 60
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