I don't like being tied up, but....... (Full Version)

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roland23 -> I don't like being tied up, but....... (10/30/2007 4:11:25 PM)

I find that it is often easier and more rewarding to "convert" vanilla people into subs than to enlist subs who have been in the "scene" for years and years. Has anyone else experienced this?  



batshalom -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (10/30/2007 4:35:46 PM)

I am entirely ... puzzled. What do you mean, roland?



KinkyYoungCouple -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (10/30/2007 5:53:23 PM)

I don't think you can really "convert" someone.  I think you can find someone with no knowledge of or experience with domination and submission and introduce them to the idea.  Some people will be into it and some will not.

I was fortunate.  My girlfriend was "vanilla" when we began dating, but she was actually a submissive and masochist who had not yet found herself.



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (10/30/2007 6:18:07 PM)

It's easy to get someone fairly open about sex into kinky sex.

It's not easy to maintain a long term Ds relationship, specially with someone not initially oriented towards it.



Estring -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (10/30/2007 6:39:50 PM)

Maybe the experienced subs see through you?



Celeste43 -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (10/30/2007 8:28:36 PM)

Turn someone who needs a power equal relationship into someone who prefers an unequal power component to their relationship, nope.

Ask someone who isn't a Southern Baptist if she'd like to try a little kink, the kind of stuff comedians on Leno joke about, of course. Tying someone upwith a few scarves is vanilla.



MasterFireMaam -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (10/30/2007 9:49:56 PM)

I call this the 'corruption fetish'. I have a bit of it, too. Kinda related to a virgin fetish.

As far as what is easier or not, it all depends on what you consider to be submission. If you're looking for kinky sex partners, you'll find lots in the vanilla world who are curious. If you're looking for a major domo, then it's not quite that easy.

Master Fire



Taboo4Two -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (10/30/2007 10:39:31 PM)

To me its a nature nurture thing. You can "convert" someone and wind up with a great bottom or top but its unlikely that he/she will become the submissive or Dominant of your dreams if they were not hard wired for it to begin with.



CuriousLord -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (10/30/2007 10:53:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: roland23

I find that it is often easier and more rewarding to "convert" vanilla people into subs than to enlist subs who have been in the "scene" for years and years. Has anyone else experienced this?


Definately.

I think part of my reason for enjoying converting over finding someone already in the lifestyle is the selection.  There's a lot more people in the vanilla world, and, in the lifestyle I live, I meet far more people in the vanilla world than the BDSM one.  Therefore, it seems that I'm far more likely to meet someone I'm compatiable with in normal life.  And, well, getting someone into M/s is really pretty easy.  (I don't have to worry about converting into the sadomasochistic bit as I'm not interested in it myself.)



roland23 -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/5/2007 7:30:32 PM)

Experienced subs see through me. You are right. These so-called "experienced subs" are looking for a hunk or a guy with money who might tie them up. That's not BDSM, that's High School.  



xoxi -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/5/2007 7:38:48 PM)

~laughs~

Sooo you're broke and ugly and to top it off when a woman isn't attracted to you, you criticize her by implying she's superficial or a golddigger?

Gee how can such a good catch be single?



sexyred1 -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/5/2007 8:08:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: roland23

Experienced subs see through me. You are right. These so-called "experienced subs" are looking for a hunk or a guy with money who might tie them up. That's not BDSM, that's High School.  


Right. All of us experienced subs are all the same. It could not possibly be that the experienced subs you have met are just not that into you.



IrishMist -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/5/2007 8:10:43 PM)

/scratches head in confusion

Dayum.... you mean we were supposed to be converted ?
WElllllllllllllllllllllllllll fiddle fuck

I sure missed out somewhere

[:o]



slaveofKaos -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/5/2007 8:53:07 PM)

A former Master once told me that, but the way he explained it was that subs or slaves that have been in the lifestyle for awhile tend to have certian ideas of how they want the relationship to be and this is usually based on past M/s relationships they have had, and arent necessarily wanting to adapt to a new Masters way of doing things. If he found someone new to the lifestyle without much experience they might have certian expetations, but are a lot more willing to adapt to a new Master.



CollegeConundrum -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/5/2007 10:16:23 PM)

I would dig that.  Helping create a new person, almost.  Someone who had no inkling or intention of ever knowing or developing their sense of dominance or submission and you're the one to pull those emotions, I guess for lack of a better term, out of them.



Twicehappy2x -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/6/2007 3:41:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: roland23

These so-called "experienced subs" are looking for a hunk or a guy with money who might tie them up. That's not BDSM, that's High School.  


Wow post number 33 and insulting an entire group of people, good job.
 
There are lots of experienced subs on cm who are not looking for either.



bandit25 -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/6/2007 3:45:58 AM)

Let me know how those insults are working out for you.



twistedwillow -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/6/2007 3:59:24 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: xoxi

~laughs~

Sooo you're broke and ugly and to top it off when a woman isn't attracted to you, you criticize her by implying she's superficial or a golddigger?

Gee how can such a good catch be single?



Yup, what xoxi said ... 

twisted~   wanders off looking for a rich, hot Dom ( or sub, cause I'm easy pleased )



openmindedslave -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/6/2007 4:03:50 AM)

If  your saying that people who consider themselves vanilla( or maybe better said, "you consider them vanilla by how erver means) are more willing to try a little BDSM for play  and are open to new ideas, well yes there is some truth there I am sure
Go into Spencer Gifts or any adult shop and you will find some form of bondage or riding crop or what ever that could add a little spice to a play. Even if you add role playing in there for a extended amouth of time, you can find that in the vanilla world.

But converting to me , .. sounds more like you have changed that persons desires and needs to the BDSM side permantly. Which is a far cry from for most?

A real person who has an atural desire or is wired that way will know the difference between a real dom or a real sub/slave .They want to live it and mostly in any type of realtionship..just becasue your a dom and they are a sub by nature, does not mean it will work out between you two.There is so much more to it. And



meatcleaver -> RE: I don't like being tied up, but....... (11/6/2007 4:20:00 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: roland23

I find that it is often easier and more rewarding to "convert" vanilla people into subs than to enlist subs who have been in the "scene" for years and years. Has anyone else experienced this?  


Every god'amn time! Subs that have been in the game for a long time always seem to have issues of one sort or another, they seem to have an inability to go with the flow as thosugh they are fighting themselves. Never had a problem of introducing a vanilla to BDSM though and when they get the taste, boy, do all you birthdays come at once![;)]



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