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i need some ideas - 10/7/2007 8:14:46 PM   
RayRay531


Posts: 2
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline 		my boyfriend is really into bondage & bdsm, and up until i met him i never thought much of it, however, ive really started to enjoy it and im usually the submissive one. But, he recently gave me a task. The next time we're together, I have to dominate him. I have every right to do whatever I want with him and to him. I'm trying to come up with some ideas of my own and my imagination sucks. I plan on teasing him with outfits that i know he has a fetish for, but he'll be blindfolded & handcuffed so he can't see or touch them. He told me about his ex girlfriend putting him in a cold shower, so I can do something with that, and he said he loves using food products. But he keeps saying I have to do stuff to turn him on, have him scared, etc. I wish I could use my imagination, but since im still new at this it's not that great. Do you guys have any ideas?
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RE: i need some ideas - 10/7/2007 8:25:41 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline 		Keep it short and simple.  You seem to have plenty of ideas.  Because this is new for you, there's no need to go hog wild; plan to spend about 45 minutes doing the things you've already mentioned.  I think you'll find the experience to be interesting, but exhausting so don't plan on doing it for a good three hours (though if you're having fun, don't feel you need to cut it short either.)

Enjoy!

Stephan


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RE: i need some ideas - 10/7/2007 8:28:16 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RayRay531

my boyfriend is really into bondage & bdsm, and up until i met him i never thought much of it, however, ive really started to enjoy it and im usually the submissive one. But, he recently gave me a task. The next time we're together, I have to dominate him. I have every right to do whatever I want with him and to him. I'm trying to come up with some ideas of my own and my imagination sucks. I plan on teasing him with outfits that i know he has a fetish for, but he'll be blindfolded & handcuffed so he can't see or touch them. He told me about his ex girlfriend putting him in a cold shower, so I can do something with that, and he said he loves using food products. But he keeps saying I have to do stuff to turn him on, have him scared, etc. I wish I could use my imagination, but since im still new at this it's not that great. Do you guys have any ideas?


What is going to be more important than the acts themselves is your ability to do them, enjoy them, and have him KNOW you are enjoying them.  Also, to have him unsure of what is next, and how far you will go.  The question is - what turns you on? What pushes your buttons?  Are you already worried about what he will think, whether you are "doing it right" or "what if he is bored?"  If those thoughts are in your head, you need to work on that first.

The rest is easy!

Akasha


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RE: i need some ideas - 10/7/2007 8:29:04 PM   
mischievousone


Posts: 164
Joined: 8/15/2007
Status: offline 		If you are to dominate him its not your responsibility to turn him on or scare him.  If he is the submissive, his job is to please you or receive his punishment.  Sounds like he still wants to remain in control to my.  My suggestion would be to redden his behind then Queen him.

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RE: i need some ideas - 10/7/2007 8:34:05 PM   
RayRay531


Posts: 2
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline 		thanks for all the help guys.

and, if im not mistaken, i was always told that if im the dominant one than im in control, and i have my way with him. when ive gotten him submissive before...he's all mine. he gets weak and i can just do whatever i want to him.

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RE: i need some ideas - 10/7/2007 8:36:28 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline 		rayray,

yup, that's the idea.  Sounds like you know more or less what to expect with him.  Just have fun with it, and don't worry too much about if it's 'right' or not, so long as you're not doing anything that could damage him permanently.

Stephan


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RE: i need some ideas - 10/7/2007 8:38:03 PM   
DrkJourney


Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline 		I agree with the above....do what turns "you" on.....you are the Domme for the evening, it's all about you, not if he's turned on or not...keeping it simple as one said is the best, tie him, tease him...forbid him to cum.

one thing...with me...I always have music playing in the background...really get's me into it...dead silence drives me insane, for me it really is deafening...and I can't hear myself think.....lol   That's just one of my little tricks any way

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RE: i need some ideas - 10/7/2007 8:41:56 PM   
Mstry


Posts: 21
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline 		Make him feel wanted by you.

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RE: i need some ideas - 10/7/2007 10:02:58 PM   
CollarNLeash


Posts: 10
Joined: 10/5/2007
Status: offline 		Im in the same boat so to speak as you RayRay, My boyfriend and I have been delving into bondage for about 12 months now. Normally hes the submissive one, and Im the dom. But we often change rolls and thats a turn on for the both of us. For our last weekend away we stayed at a cabin in the mountains it had no electricity outdoor bath and shower. We spent the weekend totally naked, I started tying him up to the trees in the open also I staked him to the ground he was blind folded. Then I walked away came back a little while later , sat a chair over his body and masterbated, he could hear me but couldnt touch me, this drove him wild.
But I'm always open to new ideas !! if anyone has any?

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Profile   Post #: 9
secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/7/2007 10:11:13 PM   
CollarNLeash


Posts: 10
Joined: 10/5/2007
Status: offline 		Recently my boyfriend and I spent a weekend in the mountains it was secluded no electricity.No neighbours -  Had a outdoor shower and bath in the  - you had to heat by lighting a fire under it - it was very romantic. We spend the weekend naked and left to our thoughts and ideas of where we could tie each other up. How to stimulate our senses and each other bodies.
We are from South East Queensland -Australia - we are looking for simular accommodation if anyone can help us ? even in Northern NSW would be okay !!

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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/8/2007 12:24:52 AM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		RayRay seems to have plenty of ideas, so run with them. I'll add one My former sub thoroughly enjoyed, and it was a spontaneous idea. We'd just got home with the shopping, he was a CD so got into his high heels. Then I fastened his arms behind his back by wrist cuffs - sat on a stool and told him to put the shopping away! Well, he was incredulous at first ... but once he realised I meant him, he became remarkably creative and it was heaps of fun to watch. His best was the way he got the pack of 6 toilet rolls on top of the high cupboard where they are stored ... after several attempts to throw them, he speared the packet with a broom handle and raised them up! Ingenious! So think of a twist on an everyday chore ... and make it fun!

Good luck!
Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/8/2007 6:53:51 AM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		yes! key...don't forget (i can't believe i am giving this secret away) you are the Dominant one....sooo you don't have to do all the work unless you want to....
if you want to be "lazy" and have an evening of service - coffee served before he gives you a manicure and a pedicure and a full body massage and the gets you off and maybe if he does it all right he can get off too the way you want him to...thats still being Dominant...and if thats not what he had in mind...well he should negotiate better...

lots of purrs
chelle


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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/8/2007 7:55:06 AM   
LadyLynx


Posts: 1098
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline 		teasing always works. tie him up so he can't touch himself, spank him, slap his cock and balls alittle bit. ( Don't have dinner, instead go with eating erotic foods, but only if he is good. if he isn't he gets a food he doesn't like. Or nothing at all.) And what is good, that you don't to get anything fancy.  You can go to the Dollar store, so many things you can get there.  There are quite a few threads on that subject, look them up.  Good Luck and report back to us what you did!

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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/8/2007 8:00:17 AM   
TotalState


Posts: 278
Joined: 9/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

if you want to be "lazy" and have an evening of service - coffee served before he gives you a manicure and a pedicure and a full body massage and the gets you off and maybe if he does it all right he can get off too the way you want him to...thats still being Dominant...and if thats not what he had in mind...well he should negotiate better...



I firmly believe in that a top/dom should at least be somewhat considerate of what the bottom/sub is expecting.  And although I could easily see myself pulling something like that off on my sub, as a part of an ongoing relationship, I wouldn't recommend it for the first session.  It might lead to frustration and resentment, and thinking that she wasn't taking it seriously.

Just a thought.


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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/8/2007 8:06:03 AM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		fine...he want food play? corn feels really good inserted...and no it doesn't have to be that big ole state fair sized ear of corn


oh yea...inserted RAW...the texture is important...and use a condom if you're that worried....the ultra thin ones...


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One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/8/2007 8:30:59 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline 		~Fast Reply

It always amazes me to see a "DO ME!" requested posted; either as a request from either side of the flogger; appreciating that the OP didn't reference any label for either participant. Is it a function of mastery, dominance, submission or slavery, or is it a display of ultimate boredom and laziness?

Think of the "dominance" involved with flopping spread eagle on a bed and shouting "DO ME!"; with or without the use of silk scarves and blindfold. Is it far removed from folding your arms looking at someone and saying to someone "amuse me!"?  Then there are always the "clues" and "hints" given to the service facilitator; "My former SO did _________(fill in the blank!", and I really liked that!"

Is spontaneity a lost 'art'? Doesn't anyone know their partner better than the strangers that they solicit ideas? Has all imagination and independent thought been stripped away? Is it the universally pervasive lack of confidence to try something only after is was validated by it 'working' for someone else.

I feel very sorry for the those put in charge of "entrainment" in their relationships; the relationship "cruise directors" if you will. It's tremendous pressure to be the one responsible for the "fun". Once you stop being the facilitator of sensation and creator of interesting scenes then what? What can you hope to achieve? At best, if you come up with something he/she really likes, you'll be immortalized by a reference in a post..."He told me about his ex girlfriend putting him in a cold shower."

To the OP -
GOOD LUCK with your effort. There is a LOT of pressure on you. The two concepts "pressure" and "fun" rarely exist together. Hope you can pull it off.

(in reply to TotalState)
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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/8/2007 9:02:33 AM   
lonlyrossInNeed


Posts: 3144
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline 		Just make sure that what ever it is its fun when you stop having fun is when it stops being good .
keep him guessing what will be next ;) .

puppy

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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/9/2007 9:25:40 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		If he is blindfolded play mind games with him. Run the blade of a knife against him and tell him that you are going to prick your initals in him. The use a toothpick to simulate it. Click a pair of sissors next to his ear and tell me you are going to cut your initals on the back of his head. Tug on his hair and click the sissors and drop some strands of string along his back at the same time. Heck use your imagination if you have on.

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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/9/2007 1:35:42 PM   
murmur


Posts: 394
Joined: 9/26/2005
Status: offline 		the part about the ex-girlfriend had me frowning. Do everything you want with him, just dont let his expectations come from the past and do a parallel with you, that wouldnt be fair to you; he and you have to work with what you've got in the present or else, it's a reminiscence of what he's already experienced. Does that sound fun to you?
Use your imagination and inspiration *from* the idea of the cold shower (good ideas already been said), but dont use that project on him. Comparaisons goes a long way, I think you can understand why.

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RE: secluded accommodation wanted !! - 10/9/2007 7:08:53 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		I have tetered on answering this question for a little while as I didn't know exactly how I wanted to respond.

I have decided to give you only what you have asked for and leave my own opinion out of this because if you wanted to know how I felt about you and your relationship you would have asked about that. Instead you asked very seriously for ideas about what you could do with your Partner in a Switch type setting.

This Advice for what to do involves you taking control from the get go.

The second he comes over put your finger over his lips and say "Shhhhhh" then gag him. a pair of panties is always a nice touch. I would leave it at yourt discression to determine if they would be previously worn or fresh. I would then have him raise both hands above his head and then bind his wrists.

Undress him and then tie a leash to his penis like a cock ring, around the base of his shaft all the way around his balls and be careful not to tie it too lose otherwise it will not hold and don't tie it too tight of you will create a turnicate on the pecker and that would be bad then lead him aroud with the leash.

Have him kneel and rather than blindfolding him for the fetich fashion walk (Which by the way how can you tease him in an outfit he can't see you in?) make him kneel before you while you try on an outfit or two or three and each time get close enough for him to touch you and if he tries knock him backward with your foot and the tap in on the cheek and say "NO" like he were a pet.

Take him by the leash to the bed and time him down again and then Paint him with choolate syrup or Honey. (If you use Honey, Lay a Plastic Trash bag down first as it tends to get EVERYWHERE) Then take your time licking it off.

The next 20 mins to an hour depending on your lover are all up to you.

::This is how my slave answered the question should it be me we were talking about, I thought it was a little hot so I thought I would share it.::

Happy Hunting

As Always

Steel

< Message edited by SteelofUtah -- 10/9/2007 7:10:33 PM >

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