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I need help. - 9/26/2007 10:35:50 PM

Kagira

Posts: 5
Joined: 9/23/2007
Status: offline

OK, here is the deal. I am male to female transgendered. I think I am bi but maybe I am lesbian. I want to experiment to figure this out. One of my fantasies; probably every womans, is to be enslaved by a powerful, loving and intelligent man who will put me in my place. Maybe a collar and some chains and some punishment when I misbehave; which is often. LOL

I am really shy and inexperienced. About two years ago I was very lonely and managed to get in touch with this guy who said he was from "the scene". What ever that is.

Well, one thing led to another and the last thing I remember about the evening is that I am across his lap and he is spanking me. The next thing I remember is I am clear across the bed, lying on my back and he is shaking me and asking if I am alright. He said that he did not want to push me any farther; it seemed to freak him out, and he was quickly gone.

Well, it is a couple years later and I am curious about what happened to me. I would really like to find someone to lead me through that experience again to see what the trouble is. It is bothering me and as long as I am afraid of it, there is power over me that maybe I don't want there.

Is this creepy enough for you?

Kajira

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Post #: 1

RE: I need help. - 9/27/2007 12:44:08 AM

HollyBlue

Posts: 144
Joined: 9/13/2007
Status: offline

I don't think it's creepy, necessarily, but it probably does need an explanation before you try being spanked again.

I'm not experienced enough myself to offer you any possible reasons for what happened, but do want to extend my sympathy. That must be very frustrating!

I hope you find more experienced players here or in your local BDSM community who can help you uncover what happened.