RE: LA's 6 month rule

RE: LA's 6 month rule (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 5:04:51 PM)
Nope I totally did NOT follow the rule. I didn't even have a rule. I wish I had.

chellekitty -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 5:04:54 PM)
does it count if you followed the rule because you were jail bait when you found the lifestyle?

OsideGirl -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 5:16:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kc692 quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl quote: ORIGINAL: xoxi 6 months of dating and doing kinky stuff before committing to a 'collar' or committed relationship? This is what the rule is. Don't make a commitment for the first six months. No offense to anyone, but that is what LA's rule is, and I assume it fits her. When I looked in the "twue" bdsm handbook, I didn't see a rule, or was aware that there were steadfast rules we should abide by because "someone" decided that every body was the same(and also decided they were the "someone" to decide) LA has never insisted that the rule fits everyone. It's her advice to people that are new to BDSM. I happen to agree with her. The word "rule" was posted by the OP of this thread, not a self given title by LA (or myself for that matter). So you just jumped all over someone for nothing.

kc692 -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 5:19:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross Nope I totally did NOT follow the rule. I didn't even have a rule. I wish I had. Wow..I didn't have any idea. That explains it. I was just confused, because as I said, I was here when you posted under the other nick as profusely as this one, unlike a lot of the posters responding to this thread, and I surely didn't remember you having any problem's in the relationship arena from "day one", rather that you were very happy and happy to share the details,with multiple owners and boyfriends at the same time(and I am poly, so I am not saying that like it's a bad thing), and that you had no bad experiences from the beginning; to the best of my knowledge you have always had the same attitude. My memory must be skewed, sorry...or is it?

kc692 -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 5:31:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl quote: ORIGINAL: kc692 quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl quote: ORIGINAL: xoxi 6 months of dating and doing kinky stuff before committing to a 'collar' or committed relationship? This is what the rule is. Don't make a commitment for the first six months. No offense to anyone, but that is what LA's rule is, and I assume it fits her. When I looked in the "twue" bdsm handbook, I didn't see a rule, or was aware that there were steadfast rules we should abide by because "someone" decided that every body was the same(and also decided they were the "someone" to decide) LA has never insisted that the rule fits everyone. It's her advice to people that are new to BDSM. I happen to agree with her. The word "rule" was posted by the OP of this thread, not a self given title by LA (or myself for that matter). So you just jumped all over someone for nothing. Last time yet again I'm going on this thread. I did not jump all over anyone..and think I plainly said that. I just said that NOONE could have a definite time frame as everyone is different and that it is ludicrous to think that one rule as far as time frame fits even most people. I also said that noone should jump into anything, and that I agreed with that ...but to banter around statistics as an expert to say things like VERY FEW people can handle things in 2 months is a GROSS generalization, and should not be made, and asked how that term was arrived at. My only point was not that one should jump into collars but that the time frame was different for everyone and could NOT be set. As another poster said when the disclaimer was made that this was for new subs, then by default a more experienced sub should not worry about taking things at a comfortable pace. My only point is that pace is different for everyone, and should be remembered. I do not remember jumping on anyone, least of all you, and I made that clear, didn't I, although you were the one that appeared to take umbrance...but thanks for your viewpoint. I will watch the answers to anyone that wants to reply to my last replies, but I will reiterate...I had nor have any desire to turn this into an angry thread. I realize it was started by the OP that had a genuine question and deserved input from everyone. I thought he was seeking everyone's opinions, or he could have just mailed LA himself privately. Having the same desire that I am sure you did to try to help and answer his question, I wanted to ensure that he was aware that the 6 month timeframe was not the viewpoint of everyone,and that some differing opinions were held by others that had just as much more experience as anyone on these boards, and that he should decide his time frame himself, as long as he wasn't rushing. edited : typo

chellekitty -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 5:33:31 PM)
to the OP....LA is not a Goddess and therefore not omnipotent...in fact she is much shorter than her picture looks....and has color...and does not walk around sideways....tis very confusing when you are looking for her in a hamburger joint....

kc692 -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 5:43:48 PM)
LOL, thank you for the humor chellekitty...kisses to ya!

chellekitty -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 5:49:06 PM)
its true...she did turn sideways and lean back for me, though...couldn't turn off the "color" thing though...i "recognized" her after that lol...

YourhandMyAss -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 5:52:28 PM)
I've had three dominants and maybe except for the first, I never went into "sub frenzy" not all women do. some do some don't. quote: ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub I agree with the translation the others have found..6 month rule gives newbies a chance to learn, and grow to open their eyes to the possibilities, while avoiding that sub frenzie thing, and to become a bit more wiser in their choice..and 6 month between relationship as others have observed for the rebound mistakes...cool/calmer heads always prevail..Tempting

chellekitty -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 6:27:21 PM)
its cause you were jail bait when you found the lifestyle too [:D]

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 7:01:44 PM)
A) No jailbait doesn't count, I know plenty of jailbait who never let that stop them B) Funny I was just talking to my partner about this today. No, I've never been in an abusive relationship, or even a "decent guy with good intentions but ultimately a loser"- I was pretty smart and kinda lucky and the guys I started with were all pretty smart, caring, sincere individuals. But they ultimately weren't "right" for me, and at the place in my life at that age, just getting into the scene, I wish I'd have given myself some room to breathe and grow before making a commitment, or at least let myself let go of it before I did. My LAST owner I can speak nothing but praise of- well he's human with faults so I could talk about those, but really, he gave me what I needed to get to where I am now. And considering how blessed and grateful I am now, that's a lot for me. However, I know myself well enough to know I'd never let my own experiences and feelings alone be the cause of a rule for everyone. The "rule" is based on years of experience, exposure, and common sense.

chellekitty -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 7:05:24 PM)
woooohoooooo that must mean i am special tooooo, cause i waited over a year...

amiciaN -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 7:08:59 PM)
I waited almost 2 years! Was I special or just a slow learner? [sm=confused.gif]

chellekitty -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 7:35:22 PM)
you can be both....special ed!

MstrSkyWoIf -> RE: La's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 11:14:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: heart cream personally i dont love 'rules' of this nature. something that may apply to one is not at all conducive to the other. i do feel there is merit in coming here, having that sort of nutty feeling take over somewhat and then getting to the other side of it safely would be the best. i am new here, inexperienced at this point and watching and learning as much as i can. i am not sure what is on the horizon for me here. maybe cuz i am older my presence here is different than had i still been a young woman. i aim to best follow my heart, intuition and my own mind. lordy, i have made zillions mistakes in my life and maybe now i avoid some of the pitfalls. i think if you resonate with this advice that is cool. then again if you dont i think that is fine too. I agree with you on this one heartcream I would also add for me it depends a lot on the gut feeling I get when talking to someone. You have to trust your instinct. If you can't then time might be your friend. I do agree no one should be in a rush if you cant take your time to get to know someone or they you something is not right.

rmanrr -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/23/2007 11:37:22 PM)
Greetings hmmm....well then ...I must have broken the rule. But being a Dom I get to do that. (smirks) What works for us works for us. The interesting thing is that we had a foundation that was built before we began speaking about anything else. In our case most likely the rule was followed albeit unconsciously.

agirl -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/24/2007 3:38:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: chellekitty no, thereafter, be reasonable, because after that you typically have some sense in you and one would hope you're not going to jump into the lap of every dude who calls himself Dominant Master or just plain cap's his screen name and devote your life to him because you have finally found your one true calling...which is what sub-frenzy typically is... do i really have to spell out assume in three words...i would think after oooh i don't know somewhere around 1500 posts you would have figured that one out.... Definitely should have added a wink.....It was a tease; poorly executed. quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross Did anyone else actually read my own response in this thread? Or are they just going to keep saying what I think or how I mean it without checking that out first? .........and that's what I meant by a life of it's own. agirl

Mercnbeth -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/24/2007 9:33:46 AM)
this slave agrees that it is a good idea to have one's own set period of time that one will use as a marker of when to decide on taking a plunge as serious as entering into a committed relationship with another...and wouldn't consider the specific time period of 6 months the "rule" that would apply to everyone.

angelthighhighs -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/24/2007 8:19:29 PM)
i went back to the original thread on this and something bothered me. not about the 6 month idea.......that one i believe is good. i tell many that are new that first searching for answers about themselves, their needs, wants, what they want out of this lifestyle and from it. to take the time to decide the type of partner they're looking for and etc. what bothered me was Jena had said many gave her the advice of putting that she already had a Master. we put great weight on honesty and being truthful and doing that to me is starting out lying. also, if you have that on your profile and then start talking with a potential and things get a little "hot" you are giving the appearance of not being loyal to the "Master" your profile states you have. so it shows dishonesty, disloyality, disrespect for this "Master". am i making too much of this, am i the only one that has a problem with that way of thinking?

DominaSmartass -> RE: LA's 6 month rule (9/25/2007 10:21:55 PM)
If only I had known of this rule and followed it, it would have saved a lot of heartache. Where was LA when I was new to the scene, huh? I certainly agree with it for when someone is just entering the scene if nothing else. Maybe we should make up little cards with the 6 month rule on them and pass them out at munches?

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.046875