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RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 6:24:40 AM

MistressLikeToys

Posts: 17
Joined: 9/14/2007
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If you would have asked me this question 10 or more years ago then my answer would have been very self biased, without the ability to see who I really was. Today I can tell you who I am, what I seek in life, and the reality that I will probably never find it. I think being able to see inside ourselves and understand what we see comes from maturity. No matter your age, if you are immature by nature, you will have a harder time of seeing who you really are.

Though I think alot of it comes from self confidence and life experiences as well.

(in reply to murmur)

Post #: 21

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 6:42:28 AM

breatheasone

Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

Tough one.

Can you be honest enough with yourself-and see who you are.

Rather than an ideal of who you are?

So that you can be honest with others?

"Can" i be? yes... am i ? no, not always...i dont think i'm very objective about myself. Some of the hardest life lessons i've learned were finding out how i "come acrossed" to others.

_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to RRafe)

Post #: 22

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 6:46:04 AM

jaxnsax

Posts: 106
Status: offline

Greetings
Can you be honest enough with yourself-and see who you are.

Rather than an ideal of who you are?

So that you can be honest with others?
Yes . Of course, what I perceive as honest, others may not. J
jaxon

_____________________________

A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows the public opinion.
~Chinese Proverb~

(in reply to RRafe)

Post #: 23

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 7:04:47 AM

sublizzie

Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
Status: offline

I think it's difficult to be honestly self-aware. I know I try to be but there are so many parts of me that I keep hidden from myself and everyone else. I know myself much better now than I did 10, 20, 30 years ago. Perhaps we aren't truly able to delve into the true depths of ourselves until we are 70, 80, 90. After all, we've gotta have something to do with ourselves when we're sitting in rockers and biding our time.

As honest as I am able to be with myself, I am willing to share with most people in my life. Not all people get all of the honest me, but most people do.

Just my thoughts.........

_____________________________

"cooking is my kink"

Collared June 19, 2008
(uncollared 12/21/09 with his death. RIP my Santa)

(in reply to RRafe)

Post #: 24

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 7:23:09 AM

feastie

Posts: 1793
Joined: 6/4/2004
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The thing I have found is that no matter how honest I am with myself, there is always something that escapes me. My perception of that particular facet of me doesn't match what others perceive. I actually enjoy this most of the time, as it gives me the opportunity to spend more time in introspection and to address or embrace this newfound self-knowledge. So yes, I am honest with myself, about myself, as I can be; I'm not afraid of it at all. It just is something that always requires alignment. Also, as I grow and increase my experiences and develop my personal truths, introspection must be employed to maintain my self-honesty.

The problem that I contend with more often than not is that I'm not very adept at sharing a lot of who I am with others. The unfortunate thing is that many times, friends, family members, colleagues do not have a true perception of certain parts of me. It's a conundrum and a complete circumlocution.

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Snarky and loving it.

Disclaimer: Any views expressed in any post are my opinions only. They may or may not be yours.

(in reply to sublizzie)

Post #: 25

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 7:26:17 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
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Learning my faults helps me to manage them.

I don't see that as a weakness.

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I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

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Post #: 26

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 7:38:25 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
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I've worked really hard to get to know myself. I think that I am as honest as I can be. I have accepted the fact that I am an imperfect being. I don't think that I am done learning myself though...and probably never will be as I change a bit with each passing day. Sometimes, someone will give me an observation about me and it will allow me to view myself from a different perspective and I learn something new.

Oh and Btw, you're all wrong....it's horsepuckey!

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to RRafe)

Post #: 27

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 7:43:30 AM

julietsierra

Posts: 1841
Joined: 9/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Oh and Btw, you're all wrong....it's horsepuckey!

Now come on! When was the last time you ever saw horses on skates chasing around an ice rink with hockey sticks in their hands?! It can't be horsepuckey!!

juliet

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 28

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 7:51:41 AM

sexyred1

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Joined: 8/9/2007
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I feel that you can be self aware and honest, but still hide things from others and most importantly, not address certain things about yourself, even while being aware of them. So I am not sure this counts as being dishonest with yourself, as much as deluding yourself.

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 29

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 7:54:20 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

I feel that you can be self aware and honest, but still hide things from others and most importantly, not address certain things about yourself, even while being aware of them. So I am not sure this counts as being dishonest with yourself, as much as deluding yourself.

It's denial.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to sexyred1)

Post #: 30

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 8:00:44 AM

LATEXBABY64

Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
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In the great words of Popeye

i am what i am what i am

(in reply to sexyred1)

Post #: 31

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 8:10:24 AM

Satyr6406

Posts: 820
Joined: 3/27/2006
From: New Brunswick, N.J.
Status: offline

I've shared this with others, before ...

I don't really go in for much of the modern-day psycho-babble bullshit but, I remember back to when my marriage ended. It was a horrible time for me, being (at that time) a Traditional Catholic and VERY aware that I didn't want my son growing up as a child of divorce; as I had.

Usually for me, when a relationship ended, I would "go out and get laid with someone else" to - kind of - "put a period on the relationship".

At that time, for whatever reason, I had what I like to call a "moment of clarity". I recognized the changes in myself that I had allowed to happen. I didn't like the person I had become.

I decided that I needed to "take stock" and fix whatever I could. For this time, I decided that I would not get involved with anyone, in ANY way. Not a "coffee date". Not a "fuck buddy". Not even a hooker! LOL!

One of my biggest woes was that, through my marriage, I had come to treat honesty very fluidly. In order to keep peace in the household (my ex is a shrew), I would tell "little white lies" ("Yes, I took out the garbage" when I hadn't and knew I would just be getting up, early and taking it out, in the morning).

That was very problematic for me because I have always abhorred dishonesty.

The short version of the story is that I spent a year re-teaching myself to be the person I wanted to be. By doing that, I was able to gain a lot of self-awareness and confidence; I was able to know what it was that I had to offer. I believe it made me a much better person.

Peace and comfort,

Michael

_____________________________

Peace and comfort,

Michael

Former Vice-President Gore didn't invent the internet but, he DID make up global warming!

(in reply to RRafe)

Post #: 32

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 8:14:31 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Satyr6406

I've shared this with others, before ...

I don't really go in for much of the modern-day psycho-babble bullshit but, I remember back to when my marriage ended. It was a horrible time for me, being (at that time) a Traditional Catholic and VERY aware that I didn't want my son growing up as a child of divorce; as I had.

Usually for me, when a relationship ended, I would "go out and get laid with someone else" to - kind of - "put a period on the relationship".

At that time, for whatever reason, I had what I like to call a "moment of clarity". I recognized the changes in myself that I had allowed to happen. I didn't like the person I had become.

I decided that I needed to "take stock" and fix whatever I could. For this time, I decided that I would not get involved with anyone, in ANY way. Not a "coffee date". Not a "fuck buddy". Not even a hooker! LOL!

One of my biggest woes was that, through my marriage, I had come to treat honesty very fluidly. In order to keep peace in the household (my ex is a shrew), I would tell "little white lies" ("Yes, I took out the garbage" when I hadn't and knew I would just be getting up, early and taking it out, in the morning).

That was very problematic for me because I have always abhorred dishonesty.

The short version of the story is that I spent a year re-teaching myself to be the person I wanted to be. By doing that, I was able to gain a lot of self-awareness and confidence; I was able to know what it was that I had to offer. I believe it made me a much better person.

Peace and comfort,

Michael

Kudos.

Sufering that comes to us can teach the meaning of stillness. Of a time to say "I have no one else to blame-what can I do?" That's when you make progress. If not, you are like alice in wonderland............

Running as fast as you can-just to stay in the same place.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to Satyr6406)

Post #: 33

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 11:43:28 AM

velvetears

Posts: 2933
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

Tough one.

Can you be honest enough with yourself-and see who you are.

Rather than an ideal of who you are?

So that you can be honest with others?

i can only be honest in that moment of who i am because who i am is always changing. So in this sense honesty must be looked at as a variable and not a constant. If i change and others tell me well you said xyz.. and that was 10 yrs ago i wasn't being dishonest, i simply changed. We can only be as honest as we are self aware.

_____________________________

Religion is for people who are scared of hell, Spirituality is for people who have been there

(in reply to RRafe)

Post #: 34

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 12:35:43 PM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline

we all build our own prisons. make or not make our own beds. we personally must live with the results of the choices we make in life. while others can cheerlead you to do xyz- it is on YOU to reap the outcome of YOUR CHOICES in life.

it is that simple.

any azzhole can give advice. but if your bed is unkempt- dont expect a person to show up and make your bed all nice. it doesnt happen.

one can whine. bemoan how "unfair" life is. think of it is sorta like a monopoly game. the rules and parameters are good bad and ugly....how you navigate life is on YOU.

so if a pity party is vehemently decriying how unfair every thing is- that energy could make up teh bed- with clean linens- vacumn and dust.

negative energy can consume a person. it serves no positive purpose.

it robs you of the moment- robs you of taking constructive action to cushion the blow.

see?

(in reply to velvetears)

Post #: 35

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 1:51:19 PM

murmur

Posts: 394
Joined: 9/26/2005
Status: offline

Reading your post made me think about the philosophy of Descartes : I think, so i am (Je pense donc je suis.) Have you read him? you could (my humble opinion) relate to him quite easily.

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Become who you are. - Socrate

(in reply to julietsierra)

Post #: 36

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 2:31:23 PM

cuddleheart50

Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

I have plenty of faults and I work on them daily.

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.

(in reply to murmur)

Post #: 37

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 8:38:24 PM

FullfigRIMaam

Posts: 718
Joined: 6/21/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: murmur
weird how that seems to be an universal thing...

Not so at all! I love my tits and ass... The tummy and arms I'd consider reducing a lil, but not the others... And Lane B finally made jeans that fit them just right too, so I'm in heaven (as far as jeans go).

To the OP, I am honest with myself, after doing way too much introspecting over the last 10years or so. M

_____________________________

"touching was and still is and will always be the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni
"Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence." Erich Fromm

(in reply to murmur)

Post #: 38

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 8:45:22 PM

KruelMistressK

Posts: 13
Joined: 7/27/2007
Status: offline

S’io credesse che mia risposta fosse

A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,

Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.

Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo

Non torno vivo alcun, s’i’odo il vero,

Senza tema d’infamia ti rispondo.

(in reply to FullfigRIMaam)

Post #: 39

RE: On Honesty - 9/16/2007 8:50:46 PM

FullfigRIMaam

Posts: 718
Joined: 6/21/2007
Status: offline

Beautifully said, even if I have no idea what you said (beyond I wish/response)...

M

_____________________________

"touching was and still is and will always be the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni
"Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence." Erich Fromm

(in reply to KruelMistressK)

Post #: 40

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