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grlneedstolearn -> Profile (8/17/2007 3:26:19 PM)

i was just wondering why people don't like to put their interests in their profile. Not that it's a bad thing in anyway, but when i get messages from people i like to look at their profile and see if we have some similar interests. To me this is easier then having to ask for it, but that's just me. So my question is: Why do people put a paragraph in their profile and not fill out at least 1 interest?
   Thank you




Dom87110 -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 3:29:04 PM)

They might just cherish their privacy.

Or maybe, just maybe, they would like to see that question in their email inbox instead of in a public post?




grlneedstolearn -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 3:31:51 PM)

Makes a little more sense, ty Dom87110




DiurnalVampire -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 3:33:55 PM)

I only have interests in my profile becasue Angel asked me t take a look at the list and do it.  For me, I dont have interests in activities so much as I do in the people I am with. Giving someone a list of what I am "iot" is misleading since having an interest in an activity doesnt gaurantee an interest in that activity WITH that person. Some of my interests are limited to Angel, others limited to Sneipre... so on so forth.
Id rather have someone talk to me, find out what they are into, and get to know them and see what we mutually enjoy rather than having them work off a list.

DV




mstrjx -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 3:57:25 PM)

The interest list can be useful, but at least the one here can be misleading.  While it is possible to denote a level of experience with certain things, things that are 'future' interests come across as 'current' interests.  What I mean by that is if I want to try something, but haven't, I'm still likely to put it as an interest.

As these interests grow, as do the years of experience, things that you've tried that you like grow numerically.  Having a large list gets to a point of intimidation.  'You've done all THAT?  You're going to do all THAT to ME?'  Maybe, maybe not.

But I certainly wouldn't want to have someone 'not' contact me because I'm 'too much'.  Let a converation determine that, not an arbitrary list.

Jeff




puella -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 4:03:50 PM)

Hello grl (please forgive my shortening of your name, my typing rather sucks due to a broken wrist...wait that took much longer to type than your actual name...hrm....),

I personally do not fill out all those likes and dislikes because a lot of the time, they seem pretty random and without clarification, mean nothing more than dingle berries dangling off the ass of a mangy dog...

I also have chuckled at too many of them to include them on my profile without being some sort of a hypocrite...EXPERT at receiving massage... really?  hehehe

I find that by not cramping my profile with endless lists of things I mighty slimly like, that when I put something down as, say, a hard limit, it has a bit more punch.  Also, I prefer for people to read my actual words and not the pre-defined hot topics that collarme has provided for likes and dislikes, etc. 

The fact that few read either my short (one hard limit) dislikes/likes or much of my profile/journal (too vast for common sense anyway) has greatly helped me in weeding out the undesirables.

Good luck out there,

the gimp




windchymes -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 4:16:11 PM)

While I agree with the less-than-impressive "expert at getting massage" trait, lol.....I think you can tell a lot about a person by the interests they check.  Those give me a starting point for questions that I can then throw into their email box.  I'm going to be much more interested in someone with at least a few of the same interests that I have than one with totally different interests.  Someone listing likes such as sailing, museums, photography and literature are going to appeal to me more than someone listing sports, NASCAR, deer hunting and gorean lifestyle.  Not that I think there's anything wrong with those, I don't....but we most likely won't have a lot in common to talk about. 

I don't think we need to run down the entire checklist and post it, but a few likes and dislikes will definitely catch my interest.  I mean, how many paragraphs of "I'm a strict but kindly dom, been in the lifestyle x years, love whips and canes, searching for blah blahblahblahblbhblblblblah"  can you read?   I'd rather skim down some likes and dislikes and see if there's something there that interests me, and take the conversation from there.  And, I'd rather see what they write to me personally instead of to the whole world.  




Padriag -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 4:23:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn

So my question is: Why do people put a paragraph in their profile and not fill out at least 1 interest?

Because that's not where I wished attention to be drawn.  There's quite a bit more than just a paragraph in my profile, and some reading through that could pick quite a lot regarding my interests.  I prefer to represent myself through my own words rather than short lists that are sometimes ambiguous, inaccurate or incomplete expressions.




Griswold -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 5:15:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn

i was just wondering why people don't like to put their interests in their profile. Not that it's a bad thing in anyway, but when i get messages from people i like to look at their profile and see if we have some similar interests. To me this is easier then having to ask for it, but that's just me. So my question is: Why do people put a paragraph in their profile and not fill out at least 1 interest?
  Thank you


I actually put my interests in some months back...but what I discovered was....

(I don't give a shit).




windchymes -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 6:32:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Padriag

quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn

So my question is: Why do people put a paragraph in their profile and not fill out at least 1 interest?

Because that's not where I wished attention to be drawn.  There's quite a bit more than just a paragraph in my profile, and some reading through that could pick quite a lot regarding my interests.  I prefer to represent myself through my own words rather than short lists that are sometimes ambiguous, inaccurate or incomplete expressions.


Yes, but you're in the small minority that actually writes a good profile paragraph!  The majority out there are just blathering mumbo-jumbo about their domly prowess and wankerly desires. [;)]




Padriag -> RE: Profile (8/17/2007 8:03:41 PM)

Are you trying to say I'm special? [8D]

I've not seen enough "dominant" profiles to know what they typically look like, but I have observed that many of the "submissive" profiles leave a lot to be desired.  A few don't write much because they aren't really looking or trying to attract anything, but the rest its hard to say.  Ironically, women don't have to write anything to attract attention, just being female is enough.  However, if they want to attract quality partners, then a good profile certainly helps.  Men on the other hand have the odds against them from the beginning, so to improve their odds of attracting attention a good profile is virtually a requirement.  The fact that apparently many don't, amuses me to no end.  Bringing this back to the topic, if a person can't write a good profile description, the I think they at least ought to make use of the interests.  Anything that creates an opening point for conversation is a plus when trying to meet people.




wandersalone -> RE: Profile (8/18/2007 9:45:47 AM)

I used to find that I was updating my interests every other day and still felt that they didn't capture too much of the person I am so I decided to write a fuller (is that a word?) profile.  My own interests can depend upon the person I am with so many of them are fairly fluid. I admit to reading peoples interest lists and being put off if they have loads and loads of dislikes.




FullCircle -> RE: Profile (8/18/2007 12:04:19 PM)

I like Ultimate Frisbee, Flea infested markets and Boot sales, does that help?




realtuffdom -> RE: Profile (8/18/2007 12:14:25 PM)

My profile has all my interests and says everything about me.




breatheasone -> RE: Profile (8/18/2007 12:17:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: realtuffdom

My profile has all my interests and says everything about me.

Oh really?.....wow, good job...i'm not that good LOL




UR2Badored -> RE: Profile (8/18/2007 12:30:26 PM)

 
My main BDSM interest is not even an option on the interest feature.(go figure)[8|]  Anyhoo, I think sometimes clarification on interests is needed (at least in my case) and besides, i am here for the boards, mainly......I dont want interests to define me because I dont view a person with the same interest neatly checked off as necessarilly a person actually compatible with me.  My interest lies in the person behind the interests as well.




FullCircle -> RE: Profile (8/18/2007 4:57:16 PM)

Does anyone know what Ultimate Frisbee is by the way? Let me tell you that once you’ve tried UF you never go back to the standard type of Frisbeing oh no.




Fnordstrum -> RE: Profile (8/18/2007 5:54:46 PM)

Heh, I have interests in my profile.. So, fnord.

¤¤¤¤¤¤¤




cuddleheart50 -> RE: Profile (8/18/2007 6:00:04 PM)

I would rather talk about my interests in person than list them.  And sometimes they change.




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