Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels...

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels...

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels...

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 5:54:13 PM

Griswold

Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline

I just bought one of those underwater (throw away) cameras...and I decided to read the instructions (I'm a guy...I never read the instructions...this time...I did):

"This camera should not be used as a floatation device".

(Seriously...I kid you not).

What else ya got?

Post #: 1

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 5:55:32 PM

MsPoetress

Posts: 1066
Joined: 4/4/2006
Status: offline

Stupid people need stupid labels.

Remember the lady that spilled coffee on her lap and sued McDonalds for 3 million?

These labels are just to cover their asses from stupid people and liberal juries

_____________________________

~poe

I'm mad, you're mad, we're all mad here, it's the fad for many a year, if you think we're crazy my dear, you're right cause I'M mad, YOU'RE mad, we're ALL mad here! - Mad Hatter

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 2

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 5:58:26 PM

TheHeretic

Posts: 19100
Joined: 3/25/2007
From: California, USA
Status: offline

I sometimes cook cedar plank salmon out on the grill. The planks come with a warning in big letters that "wood can catch fire."

_____________________________

If you lose one sense, your other senses are enhanced.
That's why people with no sense of humor have such an inflated sense of self-importance.

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 3

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 6:01:35 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

My hairdryer says "Do not use while bathing"

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to TheHeretic)

Post #: 4

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 6:28:07 PM

PlayfulOne

Posts: 1047
Status: offline

I have a friend that while getting his mechanical engineering degree had to take a class where they sat around to think up labels to put on products for stupid people. The case they reference back to was when an idiot used his craftsman lawnmower to trim his hedges and cut off his arm. He sued Sears because it didn't say he shouldn't have done that.

K

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 5

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 6:35:52 PM

astarri

Posts: 265
Joined: 4/22/2007
Status: offline

When i bought my new iron it said "Do not attempt to iron clothing while wearing them" or something of that sort

(in reply to PlayfulOne)

Post #: 6

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 6:38:19 PM

soultoshare

Posts: 519
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline

warning on the label of my OTC sleeping pills...."Do not operate heavy machinery or vehicles, could cause drowsiness"......

_____________________________

This is where I should say something witty.....well, "SOMETHING WITTY!"

**********************************************

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...

It's about learning to dance in the rain.

(in reply to astarri)

Post #: 7

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 6:38:22 PM

Devoura

Posts: 17
Joined: 5/23/2007
From: Florida
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: astarri

When i bought my new iron it said "Do not attempt to iron clothing while wearing them" or something of that sort

Uh..why not?!?

(in reply to astarri)

Post #: 8

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 6:53:33 PM

Real0ne

Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold

I just bought one of those underwater (throw away) cameras...and I decided to read the instructions (I'm a guy...I never read the instructions...this time...I did):

"This camera should not be used as a floatation device".

(Seriously...I kid you not).

What else ya got?

but i can just hit the transporter button and scotty will beam me up tho right?

_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 9

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 6:57:51 PM

DiurnalVampire

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

On a box of christmas lights :
These lights are intended for indoor or outdoor use ONLY
(as opposed to... internal?)

Allergy warning on a Cheese Bread:
WARNING: May contain cheese
(It damn well better...)

And my favorite, on a hair straightener in my store, discontinued now.
"This product was intended for use as the intended use only, not responsable for injury caused by using the product for a use not the intended use"... (however, the intended use is never actually mentioned.)

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to Real0ne)

Post #: 10

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 7:14:30 PM

windchymes

Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline

My favorite was always the instructions on the shampoo bottle: Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Duh.

_____________________________

You know it's going to be a GOOD blow job when she puts a Breathe Right strip on first.

Pick-up artists and garbage men should trade names.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)

Post #: 11

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 7:22:37 PM

Sinergy

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

I have to go with Douglas Adams who cited the instructions on a box of toothpicks.

Moisten, insert with a gentle in and out motion.

Sinergy

Close second are all the dental warnings to not use metal objects to pick your teeth; go to a dentist, wtf does
he use?

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 12

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 7:26:50 PM

Griswold

Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

My favorite was always the instructions on the shampoo bottle: Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Duh.

(Uh oh...I sense a Mobius strip here).

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 13

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 9:17:59 PM

slaverosebeauty

Posts: 1941
Joined: 12/12/2004
From: Cali
Status: offline

My fav.. on a tube of Perparation H "Do not injest." Ok, what morons did that?? yuck

_____________________________

http://slaverosebeauty.livejournal.com/

"Friends live on in our hearts, regardless if they are here or not."

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 14

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 10:27:56 PM

Termyn8or

Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline

An old Jeff Foxworthy : On a ladder it said "Do not eat" .

Of course his remarks ensued.

T

(in reply to slaverosebeauty)

Post #: 15

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 10:33:24 PM

TheHeretic

Posts: 19100
Joined: 3/25/2007
From: California, USA
Status: offline

I impulse bought a little tin of Hershey's new (in this market anyway) Dark Chocolate Truffles. 65% cacao. It's pretty tame, but would you believe it has a little "enjoy in moderation" warning???

_____________________________

If you lose one sense, your other senses are enhanced.
That's why people with no sense of humor have such an inflated sense of self-importance.

(in reply to Termyn8or)

Post #: 16

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 10:41:52 PM

Termyn8or

Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline

I thought I was done but I was wrong. I work on home theater bigscreens and all that, the service manuals can be quite.......... well.

2. ADJUSTING THE FOCUS

Symptom if focus is not adjusted properly : Picture is out of focus.

How enlightening, I learn to do this shit for twenty fuckin years and they got such explicit instructions a five year old should be able to do it.

Also, there is an IC in your TV called a jungle IC. It is called that because it is incredibly complex and it does alot to sharpen the picture on regular TV. Many hi-def sets have one too, but.......

"When replacing the video rain forest IC adjustment may be required".

What, there's trees growing inside that thing ?

Look, I didn't mean to upset anyone. As long as you don't eat a ladder you'll be fine. By the way, what kind of sauce would you use ?

We missed a few too. On a CD player "Invisible laser radiation inside, do not stare into beam". Now if it's invisible, how the f ..........

Forget it. We are doomed at best.

T

< Message edited by Termyn8or -- 5/29/2007 10:43:43 PM >

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 17

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 10:59:51 PM

SDFemDom4cuck

Posts: 2809
Joined: 5/23/2005
From: P'burgh PA
Status: offline

quote:

Look, I didn't mean to upset anyone. As long as you don't eat a ladder you'll be fine. By the way, what kind of sauce would you use ?

A Remouladder....it was so obvious....jeez.

_____________________________

Ms Jo

She dealt her pretty words like Blades -
How glittering they shone -
And every One unbared a Nerve
Or wantoned with a Bone -

I want a sensitive man - one who'll cry when I hit him.

(in reply to Termyn8or)

Post #: 18

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/29/2007 11:06:34 PM

Owned1

Posts: 847
Joined: 7/6/2005
From: Toronto, Ontario
Status: offline

This is not a useless label but when I was in VA I went to a drive through McD's and the drive through menu was in brail!?!?!?!

wtf is up with that, think about it, if the driver needed brail should he/she be driving? If the passenger was blind could the driver not read the menu to them and besides what would you do get outta your car and "read" the menu as you were struck down by the next driver?

That one has puzzled me for a few years now.

Owned

_____________________________

~~in His Chains i am free~~

(in reply to Griswold)

Post #: 19

RE: Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels... - 5/30/2007 12:21:55 AM

MadameDahlia

Posts: 2021
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: astarri

When i bought my new iron it said "Do not attempt to iron clothing while wearing them" or something of that sort

Or if you're going to... at least start with your groin area so there's less of a chance that you'll spawn.

I've seen a few nifty ones. And heard of some really odd ones.

A chainsaw bore the words "do not attempt to stop blades with genitals". Uhh... 'kay. I think I can safely avoid that one.

On an imported kitchen knife (all-time favorite): Keep out of children. But feel free to store them in your household pet.

_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

"Oh, but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away."

(in reply to astarri)

Post #: 20

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> Really...INCREDIBLY...(Stupid) warning labels...

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.109