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My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 2:15:13 PM   
spanklette


Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		Okay...here's the skinny. I have a dog who is overly protective of my person. We've gone to training. We've gotten another dog to keep him from being so dependant on me. I'm even considering Prozac...but he just loses his mind when someone enters my personal space.
 
Unfortunately, we live in an apartment, and while the dogs are kenneled in another room...I'm sure they can hear us playing. Boudreaux (the dog) has become Kujo around my Daddy. In fact, Daddy came home today, unexpectedly, and Boudreaux bit Him. Thank God Daddy had His leather jacket on, but it still broke the skin.
 
This did not go over well with my Daddy, as you might imagine. But, I'm not sure what else to do. I mean, it's not like you can explain consent to a dog. I really think that Boudreaux thinks that I'm being abused...and is just trying to be protective. But, he can't go around biting Daddy either. 
 
I'm at my wit's end...any animal people got any advice?

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"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers
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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 2:29:08 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		My personal opinion is that to expose your dog to any witness of BDSM play that could be construed as abuse really is abusive to the animal itself. I just feel it is too stressful for them simply because they are not able to differentiate. To expect your dog to know it should not protect you from harm because it is "fun harm" is too much. Plain and simple he sees your Daddy as the enemy.

I have pets myself and am fortunate to have a large enough property that they can be blissfully unaware. In your case I would suggest either playing at another location or taking your dogs to a pet sitter/doggie day care etc.


< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 5/9/2007 2:31:06 PM >

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 2:38:30 PM   
seeksfemslave


Posts: 4011
Joined: 6/16/2006
Status: offline 		Except for the abuse to the animal point I think you have got the sensible answer.

My answer is that the dog is also a dom.and you upset him when submitting to a mere two legged  kind.

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 3:10:27 PM   
spanklette


Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		I've, sort of, come to that conclusion myself...I guess I just had to hear someone say it. The other dog could really care less, but this one has had an abusive history...he's a nervous animal anyway, so this has really, kind of, pushed him over the edge. It's completely my fault...but it just didn't occur to me, until it was too late.
 
Unfortunately, I haven't had much luck with dog-sitters. He's one of those animals that has to be treated with kid gloves. When I took him to the vet to get neutered, they actually called me to pick him up early because he was disturbing the other animals. He has his moments. lol I'm working so hard to socialize him...and then I turn around and basically shoot myself, and his progress, in the foot. Ack!!!
 
Thanks for the advice. You're right. I've just got to find the right place to put them up for our kinky evenings. 

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~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 4:17:52 PM   
iwannapullurhair


Posts: 283
Joined: 10/11/2005
Status: offline 		What type of dog is it? I have a Sharpei mix and it is a one person dog. It is my mom's dog, but I've fed her for years and given her dog cookies everyday, so she thinks I'm okay now(unless I run out of dog cookies! LOL!).

Go to Walmart and get dog cookies-dogs love them. They are called Lick'n'Crunch. My dogs love them. For a dog, they are like crack.

Have your master feed the dog a cookie or two everyday-before and after you play. The dog will begin to associate the sounds of your play as happy cookie time!

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 4:24:15 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline 		you can train your dog to protect you ONLY at your command...as long as your dog understands that YOU are the alpha, not the dog.  the difficulty of the task depends a lot on the breed and your patience level. it's a lot harder than teaching them to protect you against threats THEY perceive, but a lot nicer to everyone else involved.
 
However, after you have trained him that way, don't expect your dog to protect you from an unwanted intruder while you sleep.

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 4:28:58 PM   
NakedGirlScout


Posts: 370
Joined: 1/10/2006
From: Toronto
Status: offline 		I agree with iwannapullurhair. Dogs learn by association so your Daddy should give the dog treats and you should make his coming in a very happy event for the dog. Save some extra special treats only for the occasions that he is there and he gives them to the dog, talks to the dog, plays the dog's favorite game with it. Little by little the dog should accept him as part of the "pack" and stop feeling like he's the intruder. Most dogs get excited when they see humans playing or having sex so they need to be put somewhere where they can't see or hear the action (even non-biting dogs will jump all over you).

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 4:42:45 PM   
spanklette


Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		~fast reply~
He's a pound puppy...some sort of shepherd mix.
 
We're working on the commands...he's learning. And, he's just over a year old, so he's still got that hyper thing going on. A lot of times, he's not being aggressive, but playful.

As far as the treat thing goes...he won't accept treats from anyone but me and one (just one) of the trainers at Petco. Literally. Since we live together, Daddy and he just, kind of co-exist. He's not really food motivated, so training him has been a challenge. I tried getting extra special treats that only Daddy would give him, but that was a no-go. The closest Daddy has been able to come is with leftovers...and even then he has to put in on the floor after making Boudreaux sit or lay down or whatever He's trying to get him to do. But, little by little we were making progress...until this morning.

As bad as this all sounds, it's actually a whole lot better than it was. He's a special needs animal, and I knew that when I took him in. Did I mention he's blind too? I don't know if that's part of what happened this morning.
 
I'm starting to think that maybe they just surprised each other. Neither was expecting the other to be just on the other side of the door...but, still...he can't bite first and ask questions later.

Edited to add:
I didn't get him for protection, just companionship. So, really,  I'm not trying to train him to be protective...I just can't have him out of control.

< Message edited by spanklette -- 5/9/2007 4:49:06 PM >

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"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 4:49:14 PM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline 		what you have is an issue of establishing dominance with your animal

you can be as submissive as you wish to your Daddy but you have to be the alpha with your dog

by him expressing dominance over you (some people call it protectiveness) in this dog's eyes you are his mate & your Daddy, well he is crowding in on his girl. Your Daddy is in danger of being severely harmed by this dog. Now that he has bitten him it will get worse & you are not doing this dog any favors by not putting him in his place.... naturally submissive to you.

It is a hard fact & it is often a nearly impossible thing for a person to do but only because they treat the dog as human & think they are going to hurt the animals feelings.... it is a dog & it doesn't have human feelings no matter how much you feel they respond "like your baby"

<edited to add>

I didn't see the post mentioning the dog being blind.... this opens up lots of other issues & you may have to look toward muzzling him when he is not completely supervised. This is not cruel & it is for his own protection as well as everyone elses.... consider the worst case scenario... he severely injures someone & you are faced with having to put him down because he is labeled as a dangerous animal. Some states it only takes a bite or two before you are ordered to have the dog put down.

< Message edited by MstrssPassion -- 5/9/2007 4:56:25 PM >

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 5:03:59 PM   
spanklette


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Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		Well, I have been working on that part of it with his training. He is in private training(mostly for me) and a more public training for him to socialize. He's fine with other dogs, but he's scared of people, which he's beginning to overcome...slowly.
 
He does listen to me...and I was upstairs when all of the commotion happened. If I would have been there, it never would have happened, but we live together, and the fact of the matter, is that I can't always be here.
 
Like I said earlier, though, Daddy and the dog co-exist. There's another dog in the house and they generally occupy each other. Daddy has been home since the incident and they seem to be tolerating each other, so I suppose I'll just continue with his training and find a doggy day care. 

Edited to add:

He does have a muzzle, however we were using it for nuisance barking...I really haven't had to thing about using it because he might bite. He growls and carries on, but if you approach him and he has some place to go (like under the bed)...he's gone in a flash.
 
It was just such a weird event this morning, and I guess I linked it to play, because we scened yesterday. I dunno...I'm just glad he's got class tomorrow.  

< Message edited by spanklette -- 5/9/2007 5:10:14 PM >

_____________________________

~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 5:24:31 PM   
CuriousLord


Posts: 3911
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline 		I'm sorry, I understand your plight is serious and it's an actual problem, but I'd like to say that the OP was pretty funny at the part about giving the dog Prozac.  :P

About the rest.. a muzzle, maybe?  Or perhaps he starts feeding the dog from now on?  (Dogs aren't very liable to bite their source of food unless it itself is the food it's providing!)

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 5:36:19 PM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		Hey Mickey the WonderDog is on Prozac.
Yup she too is a pound puppy (okay she is 11) with issues but I wuv her to bits. She has always been people/animal shy and I strongly regret not knowing that I needed to be the alpha for so long.
Blind dogs can be so easily startled that they get snappy, maybe your master can make sure to create some noise when entering the room til the dog knows he is there?
Good luck to all of you.

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 6:10:01 PM   
spanklette


Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		Yep...Prozac...if it helps the problem, I'm all about it...no matter how silly it sounds. He's really a good dog, despite his issues. I just want to make sure I don't put him in a dangerous situation.
 
I've been around animals all of my life, but I've never met an animal who has come so far and still has such a long way to go...

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~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 6:12:05 PM   
CuriousLord


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Status: offline 		That's so cute.. now I wanna pet Mickey the WonderDog!  (Just like a mother's children, they're puppies forever.)

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 7:20:31 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
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Status: offline 		Go get a feral cat.

(Problem solved).

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 9:01:54 PM   
iwannapullurhair


Posts: 283
Joined: 10/11/2005
Status: offline 		I have a dog that got infected eyes. She never did see that well, running into doors before the eye infection. Now she doesn't see too much at all. I try cleaning her eyes and anti-biotics didn't do the trick way back. She would always rub her eyes on things because they itched(reinfecting them maybe?). Today I tried Johnson's baby shampoo. It helped alot.

Sometimes she will growl or bark at me out of blindness, hearing me or seeing me as a vague shape or shadow. Then I talk to her and she calms down. I would think she would know my scent and that she wouldn't mistake me for someone else, but she does.

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 9:31:34 PM   
spanklette


Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		If they hadn't told me he was blind, I would never have known. The blindness was caused by the former abuse. The vet told me  that to keep him as highly functioning as possible to move things around frequently...in other words, so he has to rely on his other senses to negotiate around the house.
 
He's a spaz so I just thought that was why he was running into stuff or he'll be following me and run into me when I stop. I just thought he was following too closely...but nope, he's blind. The vet said that he can see shadows and light, but that's about it.
 
The damage was done when he was a small puppy, so there's no chance of any sort of repair. She said that there was some sort of nerve damage. I wish I could have a few minutes alone with the person that did this to him...really. I'm not a violent person, but I think I could be in this instance.
 
But, that's just a fantasy and now he's spoiled and soon to be on Prozac. He's got a pound puppy brother that he adores and hopefully he'll keep doing well socializing. We just had a set-back today. And, he and Daddy have gotten along much better tonight...he even wanted to snuggle with Daddy a little bit! Woo hoo! Progress. Little steps. 

_____________________________

~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 9:54:22 PM   
disciplinedslave


Posts: 25
Joined: 3/24/2007
Status: offline 		Hello spanklette,

i have trained dogs in the past, one of which was blind, another deaf. some of what other people have said is true. you need to be the one in charge, you need to make sure that when he does something that you dont like, you correct him and make sure that he knows that you are in charge. your daddy also needs to do this. when the dog does something wrong  have your daddy grab his scruff, stand over him and growl no in his face. this is what dogs actually do in packs, it will tell the dog that he is not in control and he will eventually submit to your daddy. also when someone enters the apartment or where ever the dog is say something to him so that he knows that you  or your daddy are there. he may not know until suddenly someone is there and now you have startled him. also dont play around the dogs, sorry but its just common sense that they will not understand and if he is protective of you then he will persieve this as a threat, and will inevidably attack. dogs are social creatures make sure that your daddy is around the dog as much as possible so that he gets to know and understand that he is not going to leave, but make sure that he understands that he is below you and your daddy.
i hope that this helps sorry if i came across a little strong.

disciplined slave
owned and collared since 3/4/07

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 10:17:15 PM   
spanklette


Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		Nope, not too strong at all. We don't play "in front" of the dogs. They are in the farthest room and all kenneled up with toys for entertainment. We turn the music on and that sort of thing. I equated this morning's problem to the scene, but we've played in the past and this hasn't happened. We also kennel them and put background noise for sex. I certainly have taken every precaution possible, because I know that their relationship is tenuous, at best. Boudreaux is very uncomfortable around men...Daddy is the only man that he let's near him.
 
You've given some advice that I've heard before...except for the growling in his face. I'm not sure that would go over so well. I think I'll ask my vet about that one...it seems like that would be a little too hardcore for a dog that is already scared. But, it's a new one and we'll look into it!
 
Thanks for your advice!

Edited to add:
After doing a small experiment, we can't hear what's going on where the dogs are kept when we play, even the loud stuff...although, dogs can hear better than humans...I think I might have just freaked out about the scene last night and the problem this morning.

< Message edited by spanklette -- 5/9/2007 10:21:57 PM >

_____________________________

~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

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RE: My dog thinks BDSM is abuse... - 5/9/2007 10:59:25 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline 		my last male dog went blind.  and he bit me.  when i said his name in a shocked tone of voice, he got this look of horror on his face and SHOT into his kennel.  i had to coax him out and he belly crawled to me for the next day or two.

we have two female german shepherds now, one is purebred and the other is a mix.  the mix we occasionally have problems with, because she IS a bit of a spaz, and had been a street dog, then a shelter dog for months.  she'll listen, but i occasionally have to remind her that i am the Big Mama and my word goes.  she doesnt like Sir very much.

the other dog, once she realized that Sir makes mama  *ahem* sing, and i'm happy, decided that Sir was just fine, and belched in his face.  that's a kiara stamp of approval.  Sir was amused....my husband was releived.  "if she belched, i can trust him with you."

good luck in the dog training, spanklette.

kitten, who is just over-amused when she has to go Alpha on the dogs.....me, a submissive, trying to be an alpha!

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